A shout out to all those shunned by family...

by Luke 14 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  Luke

  Hello people. I am a new poster here, although I have lurked for about 3 years now. So most people will not recognise me.
  
  On this forum, I have heard stories of people who are shunned by members of their own families - mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, and even their own children. Until now, I had never fully thought of the impact such shunning would have on a person. But today, it finally hit me, as I will explain.

  I had been a devout member of my church from childhood before I joined the witnesses (I'm yet to be baptised. NEVER gonna happen!). At the start of my involvement, my family members were furious, as would be expected. But over time, they finally cooled down and gradually accepted my new-found faith. Other than the occasional teasing, I have no problems whatsoever.

  Long story short. I was talking to my brother today and he casually joked about me not celebrating christmas (they think I'm still a devout witness as we don't live together). So I thought: What if my family were witnesses and I had to leave for another religion? Then they would have shunned me. That would mean the loss of the people I love with all of my life! Being how close we are, I cannot comprehend a scenerio like that. I would kill myself, I'm sure.

  Sadly, there are people here who are in this situation right how. I just want to say my heart breaks for you. I can barely imagine what you are going through. I wish you all the strength you need.
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  Azazel

  Thx Luke and welcome to the forum.

  If you have no family ties to JW you should perhaps just cut n run. (Wish i could. Family still in.)

  Regards

  Az
• 

  Luke

  Thanks Azazel. No I don't have any family member in the religion thankfully. And yes I almost don't go to the meetings anymore. The funny thing is, I put off my baptism for other reasons. I wasn't really doubting the doctrines at all. I just felt there is no point in horrying for baptism. Turns out, that was the best decision I have ever made in the religion, because 'officially' I cannot be disfellowshipped
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  mamalove

  Hi Luke, so what has made you wane on the meetings? What influenced you to study? Do you get pressure to come back to the hall?

  Welcome and looking forward to more posts!
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  Lozhasleft

  Thank you for your thoughts Luke and a big welcome from me.

  Loz x
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  00DAD

  Thanks Luke for your sympathy. And Welcome!
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  flipper

  LUKE- A warm welcome to you my friend. And thanks for the kind words. Myself as well as many others are experiencing being shunned by JW relatives. It's not easy as we have to have a high self esteem within ourselves to realize that our JW families are being mind controlled and actually are " mentally " off. I'm so glad you are seeing this before you got baptized. One cautionary warning : Do not, and I'll repeat : Do NOT let the WT socoety or Jehovah's Witnesses separate you from your non-Witness family. That is their motive in time. They will do that if you join in the organization. I advise to flee at once for your freedom of mind ! Just my 2 cents. Take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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  andys

  Its very nice to be on here and share experiences of shunning by family members, i am going through the same thing, I called my parents the day before Christmas, I haven't talked to them for almost a year since i left the JW religion, when I was starting to talk to my dad over the phone I had it on speaker phone so my roomate could hear, my dad told me that i am not allowed to come inside the house then he hung up the phone and never even sayed goodbye, my roomate heard everything that my dad said over the phone, she said it sounds like my parents no longer care, also I been educating my roomate about the JW religion and what I have gone through and telling her if the JW's come around on a saturday morning to not listen to anything they say.
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  irondork

  Nice intro, kid!
• 

  TheWanderer

  Unfortunately, this is an experience I know ALL too well, sigh... Nearly all of my immediate family (on my mother's side) is deeply involved with the JW organization.

  My father left us (and the JWs)when I was young, I reconnected with him in my 20s then lost touch when I moved to another state, and he's since disappeared by choice, no contact with anyone) My last contact with anyone in my JW family was 2005. My job had required everyone to pass an extensive background check for a new contract we'd received, so I had to gather information on my immediate family. My boss helped me use an internet service to locate my grandmother, and she was able to help me gather the rest of what I needed for the background check.

  Of course, she worked in a guilt trip comment by asking when I was coming back, which caught me off-guard and made me feel bad, but she let it go. A week later, she called me at work to ask if I'd come back, but this time I was ready, and bluntly said that I don't believe in the religion and while I don't judge them for it, it isn't for me. She got off the phone pretty quickly, and I haven't heard back since.

  I really want to relocate back to southern California, and when I do, I plan to go around and try to visit my family at least once, just to see how they are. To show them that I still care even if they don't. And maybe it won't matter to them.

  But it will to me.