If you show up out of the blue to the KH for the memorial WITH NO SPECIAL INVITATION....you will be love bombed. Not a good idea
Also....it sounds like your wife faded for the wrong reasons. It sounds like she faded out of discontent or perhaps depression. Unless she faded due to the lies and hypocrisy of the Watchtower then I am afraid she is ripe to be lured back into the flock of mindless sheep. It won't take much. A major world event.....a natural disaster.....anything that can trigger the cult mindset to kick back in and the next think you know she'll be front and center at the KH again.
On the same token you don't want to viciously attack the organization right now either because it is CLEAR that she still feels they have SOME sort of truth or she wouldn't want to attend the memorial.
If I were you I would happen to trip upon maybe one more hot topic item. Maybe print the letter that Rutherford sent to Hitler and say in a disheartened tone "I just don't understand how God could tolerate such rhetoric from the leader of the organization let alone direct it." Maybe that will be all she needs to stay home. Beyond that....I wouldn't cause too much of a stink for fear that you'll come across as bitter and evil.....just like what the WT warns her about.
At least your wife will LISTEN to you. If I were you.....and all the above fails....then I'd go with her...but I'd print out ahead of time a good definition of "love bombing" and prime examples of when and how love bombing is used. I'd also make a list (perhaps) of names from the KH that had always been rather indifferent to your wife in times past......but that you suspect may be prime love bombers. On the way home from the memorial, when your wife mentions how nice everyone was......I'd hand both the list of names and the definition/examples of love bombing to your wife and say...."yeah it was nice that everyone was so happy to see you.....but....I've been doing some research on not just witnesses....but other high control groups as well. I knew this would happen. I knew they would "love bomb" you. I wasn't able to predict this because I am some blessed saint.......but because it is a standard action/reaction of any high control group when they see a new prospect or an older prospect that has been disengaged for a while. It isn't unique....but rather a telltale sign of a high control group at work."
If there is anything I've learned it is that this fight is like a boxing match. Only you're a light weight and the Watchtower is a heavy weight. You're ONLY chance at victory is to grind out a 12 round decision by jabbing and moving. Continue to ask pertinent questions and lay seeds. If you go for the knockout punch, you're the only one that will end up on the floor. The Watchtower cannot be knocked out. But it can be defeated.