SAD!

by 2SYN 20 Replies latest jw experiences

  • 2SYN
    2SYN

    Well this isn't just another "BOOHOO, I'm so depressed, bwaaa!" thread...this is a more detailed investigation into the reason behind my sadness. I felt like I could share it with the people on this board, as you lot in general seem to be far more emotionally sensitive than a lot of people on the Internet.

    I've been listening to OK Computer by Radiohead, and I must say, it's by far some of the most emotional music I've ever listened to. (BTW - I'm about to get some shut-eye, it's nearly 1AM in South Africa as I write this...) Thom Yorke's distinctive voice and the bands mind-blowing lyrics are so powerful that they make me want to burst into tears.

    This leads me into the second part of my essay, which is the fact that I haven't cried for nearly 4 years.

    Yip. I kid you not.

    Let me put it this way - when my grandmother died about six months ago, I didn't cry. When my beloved uncle died about three months ago, I didn't cry. I didn't cry when I DA'd myself (although my mom + dad did).

    I'm beginning to wonder whether I might not have some sort of physical disfunction or something. For some reason I'm capable of travelling to bottom-most depths of depression for brief periods of time and then zoom straight back out of them. But I've never shed so much as a tear.

    Maybe I like being depressed

    Doesn't it seem to you guys that the best art in the world is created by sad people? Perhaps sadness and being blue are the highest possible state a human being can achieve, and that's why so much of the best music in my collection is very sad, depressing stuff.

    Cold, emotionless automaton - that's how many people I know see me. Believe me, I've seen some terrible things in my life. You can't live in South Africa and not have these sort of experiences - it's an extremely violent country, on par with Columbia even. Murders and shootings are the order of the day here, and I've seen more than my fair share of deadly criminal activity. I've even been involved in quite a few high-stakes 'jobs', as perpetrated by our local terrorists.

    My years in the BOrg taught me to bottle up my emotions. Maybe this is why I can't cry! In this culture I live in, crying is seen as a sign of great weakness in a man, and derision is sure to follow. Quite different from many other Western cultures, actually. I wonder why this is so?

    A question - when you guys remember things, events, people, what do you experience? Do you remember the way you felt, or just how things looked & stuff? What I'm trying to say is, do you remember the feelings associated with your experiences in life?

    I have a semi-functional photographic memory, which means that I can remember ANYTHING if I concentrate on it for a bit, or if I just make myself remember. I'm not blowing my own trumpet here BTW, this is just the way my mind works. There are probably thousands and thousands of hours of mind-bendingly sad music stored in between my ears that I can replay at will. Many other people have this gift too, I've met a couple. This, along with the God only knows what else, is crammed into my skull. Everything is OK, I'm not mentally falling apart or anything (the opposite in fact, my recall and mental clarity seem to improve substantially as time goes by!), but I still feel like there's something missing, something I've been hiding for too long.

    This might be the last vestige of my time in the BOrg, and I'd like to get rid of it. Suggestions, anyone? Thanks for your time...if you've gotten to this point in my post, I hugely admire your attention span!

    The earlier in the forenoon you take the sun bath, the greater will be the beneficial effect, because you get more of the ultra-violet rays, which are healing. - The Golden Age

  • 2SYN
    2SYN

    OJ Land or what???

    The earlier in the forenoon you take the sun bath, the greater will be the beneficial effect, because you get more of the ultra-violet rays, which are healing. - The Golden Age

  • Shimmer
    Shimmer

    SYN,

    It almost sounds like you have been desensitized by all of the trauma that you have had to endure. Have you thought of therapy? I know that there is a stygma attached to it, but from personal experience it helped me immensely. I had therapy a couple of years ago and I found out things about myself that I didn't know existed. Sometimes just talking to someone about events in your past can help you dig down and find your emotions that you've locked up inside.

    I hope you are able to find the reason to your sadness, you seem like a realy great guy who deserves to be happy. I always enjoy reading your posts.

    Shimmer

    Maybe being oneself is alway an acquired taste.-----PATRICIA HAMPL

  • 2SYN
    2SYN

    Oddly enough, this site seems to be the focal point of a lot of my feelings lately. That's why I attack Dub-supporters and their kin so rabidly! If I offended anyone, sorry, but I try my hardest just to state simple, undisputable facts + things like that. I don't make up stories to discredit the WTBTS - they are doing an excellent job of it themselves already. Go WTBTS GO!

    Anyway, back to the topic - no, I've never tried therapy...maybe I should give it a whirl sometime, you never know what might happen. Maybe I'll scare the willies out of the shrink! Hehe...

    Most of the time I am relatively happy...as happy as a recovering Dub can be, I guess. I would be far happier if I had a nice, warm women (notice the spelling there ) to hold right now, but nothing I say on this site is going to help me with that, so I guess I'd better go do some serious girl-hunting pretty soon.

    And Shimmer, do you really live in Swaziland? 'Cause that's a few hundred kilometers north of Johannesburg! WTF? Or did you just choose it randomly...?

    The earlier in the forenoon you take the sun bath, the greater will be the beneficial effect, because you get more of the ultra-violet rays, which are healing. - The Golden Age

  • Kep
    Kep

    Hi ya Syn,
    You've got me thinking about myself now..
    I also had some counseling, and it did help me at the time.
    My mind is/was like yours, total recall.
    So I needed a way to help turn this thinking into something positive, whereas I was always on the negative.
    My sessions helped me do that.
    "Doesn't it seem to you guys that the best art in the world is created by sad people? Perhaps sadness and being blue are the highest possible state a human being can achieve, and that's why so much of the best music in my collection is very sad, depressing stuff"
    That's a valid comment mate. I found I was more able to write/express my music in this state.
    Now that my life is so much better, my creative ability seems hampered.
    I hope you do find a nice lady to share your life with.
    That's what I needed and thankfully after sorting myself out I did.
    Kep

  • Shimmer
    Shimmer

    SYN,

    No, I'm not really from Swaziland, I just thought the name sounded cool. I thought the United States was too boring to put down.

    My mind is just the opposite of ya'lls, out of sight out of mind. I can't remember much of anything, especially my childhood. Maybe that's a good thing.

    Shimmer

    Maybe being oneself is alway an acquired taste.-----PATRICIA HAMPL

  • proplog2
    proplog2

    The Watchtower taught me to cry. A lot!

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Scents bring back the most vivid memories and feelings.

    The deepest emotions bring out the greatest art - love, sadness, anger. None of these from a dispassionate heart.

    For the record, I've shed more tears in the last six months than I have in my entire life - I joke not!

  • 2SYN
    2SYN

    Shimmer: You wouldn't want to live in Swaziland then! I doubt that you'd like it much...

    LittleToe: Same for me, scents bring back some pretty good (+bad) vibes sometimes...

    The earlier in the forenoon you take the sun bath, the greater will be the beneficial effect, because you get more of the ultra-violet rays, which are healing. - The Golden Age

  • KissAFish
    KissAFish

    Hey Syn...I can relate totally...I went thru that for a long time..It is a totally normal response..It for me was a holding back..something I held, as I had a particularly viscious Mum, who was justified by the WTS by any discipline methods she thought acceptable.. ie>starving ..abuse etc..So whenever she would start up..I was determined NOT to cry..and apparently..when I went to seek help about getting things together ( which I highly recommend).I was told..that it is normal to hold back tears as a form of power if something is taken from you.And in all of our cases being a JW..took power away..the power of free thinking.. so I dont know if that was any use.. but I cry like a fountain now.. sad and happy...which is normal for a latin... LOL..So there is always hope..

    "Reach for the moon. If you miss, you may fall on a star." (Marvin the Martian)

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