Gossip, gossip, gossip

time2keepmoving

Even though I've been disfellowshipped for several months now (looking forward to my 1 year anniversary). I did have a brother contact me about one of my siblings who is still "in" and ask me personal questions about them. He also shared with me a lot of personal info about my sibling that I did not know, obviously my relative shared this information with this brother in confident.

I felt like if my relative wanted me to know they would have told me. Yet in talking with me, he was more than happy to break their confident and fill me in.

I have come to the conclusion that he enjoyed this and has no qualms whatsoever in telling other people business, including to disfellowshiped relatives. In talking to him, I've discerned he does not have all his facts right, but that's okay....because does that really matter in the bOrg?

He has also felt generous enough to inform me about personal info he has heard in passing *eye rolling* about other "friends" I was previously acquainted with in the KH (ex. like one of the sisters being HIV positive ~ if it's true I wonder how that info got out).

Man, the gossiping never stops. He is running his mouth and throwing all kinds of people under the bus with his gossiping, breaching people's confidenality, innuendos, misinformation, etc. and there is no shame in his game. He is also dragggging my relatives name through the mud in the organization (can't say I was too mad about this or discouraged it, maybe this will be the thing to make them leave or at least open the door to the possiblity).

I basically decided to stop taking his phone calls, because this so-called brother is totally negative and 1) I really don't care. I'm out of the Borg. 2) This just reaffirms my decision not to go back 3) I want to move on with my life and I really don't want nor care what is going on with these folks including my relations who are still in. Their in am out!

MMXIV

Does he know you're disfellowshipped, if so why does he think it's ok to talk to you? He seems to be full of negative stuff about people - is he negative about any doctrines or being a JW (i.e. field service)? Is he saying these things because he thinks you have a negative view of JW's so feels comfortable sharing this stuff and maybe having doubts or trying to fade?

Gossip is shocking in some KH's - I've not seen anything so bad and worked in lots of environments.

mmxiv

TOTH

Sounds to me like he's fishing for MORE info. He is filling his rumor mill with anything he can find from anyone he can. I agree with you deciding to not talk to this ass hat.

LongHairGal

time2keepmoving:

The people in the religion are addicted to gossip and it is their favorite passtime. I wonder if this is because JWs are told not to idolize celebrities so therefore they will talk about people in the religion. Somebody DF'd or DA'd is an especially juicy tidbit and this will keep the gossip mill going for quite a while! It is like a soap opera.

Maybe it is because many JWs never go anywhere except to the meetings and their exposure to people is very limited. This may possibly be a factor in their extreme gossip about other people in the religion. Never forget that there is NO expectation of confidentiality in this religion. People are deluded to think anything they tell anybody there is private. It ALWAYS gets out! Elders tell their wives things and then the wives get on the phone and tell whoever. Also, elders may step down. What happens to all the confidential things they have learned over the years? Not a good feeling.

Disillusioned Lost-Lamb

I never, nor will I ever, tell a secret to a witless; they are the "friends" you tell things to when you want a rumor to be spread.

For a group that prides itself on secretiveness and confidentiality, they do an awful lot of blabbing, gossiping and snitching.

Chariklo

IN the local KH they make a big thing about not gossiping, but I have never met anywhere where there is so much gossip.

I've also learned that the biggest virtue among JW's is spying on each other and reporting back to the elders. Ugh.

I Want to Believe

Gossip is also a byproduct of a culture that expects everyone to snitch on anyone doing something they see as wrong, often being told to be wary of bad association even in their own midst. The first thing guests do is look through the host's CD/DVD collection. There's a high level of paranoia is the organization; I don't see how anyone could consider it an upbuilding place.

And if THAT didn't work, then I'd send a few copies to the most assertive people among his victims....