In Limbo

by Apollo 22 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  shopaholic

  Apollo, I have relatives just like your aunt. It's a guilt trip. You're an adult and have the right to decide which religion you want to participate in. Keep in mind that it can be difficult for people that saw you grow up to now see you as an adult. Don't feel like you have to explain yourself to any them.

  I would recommend not avoiding their phone calls. You are letting them control your behavior, albeit unintentionally. You don't have to hold a 3 hour conversation with them. You can end the conversation whenever you want. The thing about being raised a JW is that it takes a while to understand your rights as an adult.

  Regarding them making up a card to DF you...they are not suppose to do that but it doesn't mean they wouldn't. But I think you are fine for a while.

  Life's a journey and I wish you a successful one,

  Shop.
• 

  00DAD

  You've gotten a lot of good suggestions so far. One more idea:

  Tell you aunt that if she wants to be nice you'll talk to her but if she can't, then you won't.
• 

  Ding

  The OP reminds me of the old TV series "The Fugitive" with Richard Kimble always keeping on the move to avoid detection.

  It's a shame the WT religion does this to JWs.
• 

  jamiebowers

  I don't know what they do with the publisher cards, but I've never heard of one being made up in order to df someone. As far as your aunt is concerned, block her number if possible. If not possible, contact her in writing, either by email or certified letter and tell her that you will not respond to any of her messages and to cease and desist under threat of a restraining order.

  Edited to add: Welcome to JWN.
• 

  Apollo

  Thank you for all of your replies. I probably should have responded last night, but I was watching hockey. I just revel in living alone and being able to watch anything on TV any time I want. Anyway, after reading everyone’s responses I’ve come to realize that I have nothing to worry about. I haven’t had contact with either of the local congs in months and they don’t know where I live. My old cong back home can’t do anything to me and I don’t see why they would even care if I’m not around.

  I bought another cheap prepaid phone yesterday and used that to call my mom. I told her about the nasty messages from her sister/my aunt and I asked her not to give the new number to anyone including my aunt. Hopefully she respects my wishes regarding the new number and I can let my aunt and anyone else call the other phone incessantly and just never answer it. Although I must admit it is kind of ridiculous having 3 cell phones. As long as I can talk to my parents and my younger brother on the phone once in a while I’ll be happy.
• 

  Iamallcool

  Welcome to the board!
• 

  hoser

  "You've gotten a lot of good suggestions so far. One more idea:

  Tell you aunt that if she wants to be nice you'll talk to her but if she can't, then you won't. "

  just to add. tell her if she isn't able to apply the fruitage of the spirit , you won't be able to talk to her
• 

  Apollo

  After having read a number of different posts here and elsewhere, it is my understanding that there is no centralized record keeping by the WTBTS with regards to who is and is not baptized, and whether or not they are active, inactive, disassociated or disfellowshiped. So to use an extreme example if one were to move from say New York to Dallas then to Denver then to Los Angeles formally transferring from cong to cong each time, does that mean that one could get disfellowshipped and shunned by his current cong in Los Angeles without his old cong and family back home in New York ever knowing of his status?
• 

  Inisc

  Welcome Apollo, another newbie!

  Theres a lot of us!
• 

  EmptyInside

  Welcome. As far as going to another hall across the country if your disfellowshipped,they will ask for your records from your former congregation. Unless,you act like an interested person all over again,you can't pretend to be a Witness in good standing. Your record follows you,with a letter of introduction from the Body of elders.

  But,in your situation,you moved,they don't know you,rejoice. It's every fader's dream.