Whats the real reason men want to become elders?

by usualusername 41 Replies latest jw friends

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  usualusername

  heart of a boy
  
  You are not suggesting that Jehovah wants to use men of little talent to oversee his sheep?
  
  Shocking...
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  tornapart

  I only know about my own husband who is an elder and it is because he genuinely loves the brothers and wants to do his best to help them. There may be many who do it for the 'prestige' it gives them but I'm sure there are just as many like him.
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  Alfred

  My brother is an elder... However, he NEVER wanted to be an elder or carry that kind of responsibility on his shoulders. In fact, would always avoid the subject and make up excuses whenever he was approached by the BOE. But my brother happens to be a push-over and the BOE knew they could "persuade" him eventually... so they started working on him with the guilt-tripping (i.e. "we really need your help, you can do so much more for Jehovah, etc .) and after many years of this, my brother finally caved in... Now he is extremely miserable but is simply too afraid to speak up and much less step down because of all the pressure he feels (with the congo not having enough elders, etc.) ... so sad.
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  rnewman123

  Some get overcome by it, some abuse it, some handle it well...does it sound like alcoholism??
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  outsmartthesystem

  What Cedars said.
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  undercover

  Ditto what Cedars said. The only thing I would add would be, that for male 'born-ins' the office of elder becomes the expected path that you should want to take as servant of Jehovah. Even if you can't pioneer or go to Bethel, you can still be an elder.

  It's unspoken, but any baptized JW male of reasonable age is expected to be an elder. Anything less and he is "weak" or untrustworthy. Even when you don't really want to be an elder, you feel pressured to become one just to show that you are faithful.

  But there seems to be a shift. Since my leaving, more and more brothers are not reaching out. Out of all my (so-called) buddies growing up, only a few became elders. The vast majority did not. Some are still active and maybe MSs, but aren't reaching out to be elders.
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  Mr. Falcon

  cedars and UC are right on the money.

  God knows men don't "reach out" for the women or money.
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  James Brown

  It was something to do.

  I only made it to ministerial servant, I really wanted to be an elder,

  but 75 came when I was 23 years old. They said I was too young to be an

  elder then.

  Then 76 came and I no longer had any interest in being an elder. Or even going to meetings.

  I enjoyed giving Sunday talks, which as a ministerial servant they let me give lots of, sometimes

  on an hours notice. Being a Witness was my avocation, I wanted to excell and do my best, aspiring

  to be an elder seemed to be the way to go.

  During 74 and 75, I thought I was doing a life saving work and that delusion was rewarding, I was firing

  off endorphins left and right.
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  Quarterback

  I appreciate all of the comments that have been made. Yes, I agree, the love for power is a motivator for some who chase this office.

  But, some volunteer in this office to assist others. I have seen both tendencies in some men.

  When I reached out, I got tired of sitting down and only commenting at meetings. I got tired of some men giving their personal opinions on the platform. I thought that if I joined the system, I could change the system. That is a concept that people thought of in the 70's.

  But now that it's been over 10 yrs that I have stepped away from that office, I don't miss it. I could be just as helpful by standing in the shadows.

  I have some that approach me for their issues, and they know that I will give them an honest, thoughtful response, with a twist of humor.

  I have turned down 3 offers of becoming an Elder in the 10 yrs that I have stepped down.
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  undercover

  some volunteer in this office to assist others.

  Yes, that is true. From my experience though, those good hearted men where in the minority.

  On the upside, those men made good elders. Men who were looking to help people, not lord it over them. Even though they were part of a high control group, they were often an oasis in a desert of WT lackeys looking to assert their authority. I think fondly of the few good elders that I knew and remember them for their humanity, mercy and humble attitude.

  On the downside, it was my observation that most of those good men burned out and stepped down for their own peace of mind which unfortunately left the powertrip crowd in charge, thus creating hardship on the flock as they strained under the heavy yoke of assholes and company men.