I completely disagree with the people here that are saying that the elders will not read the entire letter. They certainly will. They will likely dismiss your points, but still they will read it. The reason why you should expand on why you are leaving, is because typically when someone disassociate themselves, the typical knee jerk reaction is for people to think " gee i wonder what he is doing to disassociate himself"..."probaby sleeping around"..."Drugs"..etc etc. This way you make it clear that you are leaving, NOT because you are not good enough for the cult, but because the cult is NOT good enough for you.
my DF-ing letter - opinions
by raxxxx 39 Replies latest jw experiences
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RayPublisher
When I was an elder there was at least a half a dozen times that a publisher handed us a thick letter that had 7,8, or even 10 typed pages.
They were read- although I remember skimming a couple because they were rambling and repeating themselves.
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Billy the Ex-Bethelite
Good letter. As mentioned, I'd probably make a longer list with each of the reasons shorter and sweeter, no more than a sentence. Then in the concluding paragraph inform them that I am disfellowshipping all of them for apostasy.
Keep the text short, only about one page. And use a nice big font that they can see without squinting.
Instead of closing with "Yours faithfully", I'd use something like: "A Slave of Christ, not a slave of men," or "I was blind, but now I see,".
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jgnat
I like the letter. I can be a brutal editor, but I like the style of this one. You are declaring your beliefs in a plain and direct way.
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Kool Jo
Great letter.....enjoy your freedom!
Peace
Kool Jo
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lumper
Raxxx wrote: I am packed and ready for a new adventure.
That makes me want to ask you- are you moving away from the place where you now live? If you are as much as a letter written to the BOe may give you great satisfaction would it not be better to just do a fade at your new location (never show up at the new KH), so that you do not break ties with your family? If you find yourself in a tough situation in the future it is always great to be able to rely on your family. If you DA you will lose that resource. As far as the letter to the BOE- it really feels good to write it out but it may be one of those letters you write and yet never send. Whatever you do let us know; we will be praying for your situation.
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exwhyzee
I understand the desire to write a DA letter and how theraputic it would be but to me it says,
A )You view them as someone with actual authority. In your letter you stated in so many words that you don't believe they represent God nor do they have the truth so why do you feel it necessary to explain anything to them especially anything as personal as your relationship with God.
B) You care what they think. You've explained that they are spreaders of untruths and that you have received more love from non JW's than from those in the Congregation so why bother with them? Most of the time in life we just walk away from or distance ourselves from people we don't trust or those who seem like they don't care about us. To announe it to them beforehand seems childish and needy....even sort of "drama" based. "You're not nice so I'm never going to speak to you again"
C)You want or expect them to take the next step in the process which is Disfellowshiping you. When you write a letter like this you are drawing a line in the sand for them to step over. As legalistic as they are, they will have no problem exercising their "in house" self appointed authority. You've made it easy for them. They don't have to do any homework or gather any facts to find out what is going on with you. You've spelled it all out for them and you've put it all in writing, nice and legal like for them to file away for anyone to dredge up in the future.
As much as you'd like to give them a piece of your mind, what you're really doing is burning bridges behind you. You sound pretty young and it's easy to be impetuous when one is young. You are giving them the power to yet again have some sort of say in your life and to have an impact on it forever. There is no where in the Bible that says that you must write a letter to anyone explaining your beliefs and your actions. This is their little custom. If you don't acknowledge it....it doesn't exist.
Have a little mystery about yourself....let them wonder about you...give them nothing.
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Shawn10538
It's good but nobody that cares will ever read it. They won't read it from the platform or anything. But it sounds like you are being sincere so kudos! Welcome to the world! Have fun figuring everything out for yourself. I always do.
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Shawn10538
I also like the points of exwhyzee. I refused to give them anything. The sad part is that they eventually went after me, but that was my fault for coming back for a girlfriend.