by thecrushed 29 Replies latest jw friends
Whether you've expressed any apostateisms yet or not.....your MIL knows this:
1) You are bipolar
2) you are now drinking too much
3) You aren't studying
4) You aren't going to meetings
In her eyes, apostate talk or not.....you are already being controlled by Satan. She MUST step in now and save her daughter.
Lock your bedroom door.
Your MIL needs to leave as her presence is making your and your wife's issues worse. she is most likely to drop you in it so be careful. If elders come over say you are strugggling with your own personal health issues made worse by her visit. You know where they are and will come to them if you need help.
Give time for the dust to settle and some level of peace to be restored. Your wife at the moment is caught in a miserable place in the middle of it all and she needs time to recover her equilibrium. So don't dis the MIL or express your frustration with her or the society. Instead speak positively about your wife, how much you love her and how you have missed being alone together.
Focus on getting yourself stable and calm before worrying about anyone else. Cult counsellors focus on healing self before you are in a position to heal others. Keep the lines of communication open with your wife and do not pee on her sacred tree i.e. do not disparage her faith and ideas or the leadership. If you do she will close communication and feel threatened.
The MIL goes home tomorrow best news ever but she will still try to interfere from a distance.
Put her bags out on the curb, call her a taxi, and lock the door.
I was very fortunate I didn't get married before making my exit. I can't even imagine what kind of pressure and depression that must cause, especially since you were diagnosed bipolar. At least she'll be out of your hair soon. Then you have the undesirable job of trying to make good with the wife. I hope things work out for you.
I'm sorry about all the drama you're dealing with, but keep in mind that if ANYTHING you have said has struck a nerve they see that EVERYTHING they believe in is a lie.
That's a lot for the mind to deal with, especially with all the meds everyone at your house is on!
00DAD
mrsjones5 I dare her to walk in our bedroom while we are having sex. I wouldn't be that upset about her seeing me naked but I know it would scar her for life That would teach her to honor a married couples privacy. This isn't the first time she has walked in our room and flipped on the light to ask us some stupid question while we were sleeping. She always seems to be surprised when I tell her to get out of our room or else! and then stare at her with a gaze that could kill.
I'm usually a very gentle man with mild manners but when she comes into town and pulls that sh*T the SATAN she thinks is inside me really comes out to play. I'm a bipolar man that is having a life crisis. SHE IS PLAYING WITH FIRE!!!!!
Keep your cool, crushed.
Can you get your wife to mutually agree when your MIL has stayed long enough? Come up with a strategy to push her out the door. Your selling point I think, is that the two of you are under enough stress and you need each other to sort things out before having others stick their fingers iin.
I am worried about the drinking (self medicating). It messes with your meds.
You know, you can gently say to her, "it's time for you to go home now." Then just keep repeating it, very gently every time. Keep your cool, don't lose your temper, just keep telling her it's time she left.
Much better to be straightforward with her than to keep drinking to feel better. The drinking is really damaging, well, I guess you know that so I don't need to hammer that point.
Yea I know the drinking isn't helping but I can't help it at this point I'm trying keep from exploding. MIL comes to town Drinking goes UP!!! MIL goes home drinking goes DOWN!! Actually she just walked in my study and told me that I'm undermining my marriage and I'm destroying my family. Well that was what she was going to finish saying before I cut her off and told her to keep it to herself. She is seriously love bombing my wife and placing all the blame on me. MIL even had the nerve to say that I've been cold, and alof to my wife and it's hurting her. I'm not cold and alof to my wife just to her!!! F**KIN go HOME and let me repair the damage you F**Kin caused you sorry miserable, undersexed, fat, ugly, hypocritical, meddling, gluttenous Bitch! You have done nothing but make your daughter insecure about her weight and looks all her life and YOUR the reason she purges and is bulimic! You pick at her wieght while you stuff your face with junk food all day to the point that we have to go behind you when you leave and find all the half eaten food you leave under and around the guest bed. YOUR the one that told your daughter that no brother would ever want to marry her because she messed up and slept with a couple guys in high school. That messed with her head so much that she had to tell me about this and ask if I minded that she wasn't a virgin before we continued dating. YOUR the one who has damaged her self image and esteem on top of what the WT does to us all!
