by RJB 19 Replies latest jw friends
A Big Hello RJB,
"Treated like you've got the plague"
eh? Well, you won't find that here.
I lurked at this site for more than two weeks before I 'joined' in the conservation. My advice to you is
"just jump right in." We are sometimes a little serious and sometimes a little silly - and sometimes a little angry - but we all share and support one another. It's a great place to be and we are glad to have you with us...looking forward to your postings.
Zazu
RJB, A warm welcome to you. Enjoy your stay here and I'm looking forward to your posts.
Seven
Dittos on the welcome, RJB! It's hard to be lonely on this board. Everyone has a say.
, I was treated like I had the plague. Hardly anyone would talk with me, especially, the elders.
It's really strange to practice shunning for years as a JW only to be on the receiving end of it. I remember shunning this sister who developed breast cancer and died. I saw her at the mall one day and we exchanged glances. That was it. I remember seeing the terrible hurt in her eyes. She died without any support from her conditional "friends" at the Kingdom Hall, including me. Now I feel like a piece of crap. She left behind two kids from her first marriage(he was abusive, so she got a divorce) and one from the boyfriend she got disfellowshipped over. Her boyfriend was and still is a really nice guy who was studying at the time. No more. He's raising a fine young man by himself.
Anyhow, I feel your pain and I'm sure this sister did too.
TR
Edited by - TR on 18 January 2001 9:56:6
TR,
I think we all have regrets like that. I guess we just have to put that behind us and move on. Tough, but necessary.
I had a friend who got df'ed. He got Aids (yes he was gay). One of my biggest regrets was not seeing him before he died.
I wrote a very loving and lengthy letter to his parents (mom a JW). Never heard back. Too little too late, I guess.
TW
"I have come to realize more and more that the greatest disease and the greatest suffering is to be unwanted,unloved, uncared for, to be shunned by everybody, to be just nobody." -- Mother Teresa, My Life for the Poor!
How true, there are many of us who have been shunned by our families and friends. I still have my parents, but that's it. My sister and best friend are the ones who turned us in! I was a 3rd gen JW and all family on both sides is In. I haven't been able to see any of them or my friends. It's very hard! One thing that helps is that they have it worse then us, because they think we're spawn of the Devil and will die at Armegedon! How sad, they think that showing the love and concern that they want to show, will prove them disloyal to Jehovah. It's is really a horrible postion for our loved ones who are still in. I pray for them diligently and know that each day it get's a little better, the pain dulls a touch. Sure it flares up at times, but it does get better. Sometimes you don't ever think the nightmere will end, especially in those weeeee hours of the morning, but the sun does come up, and life goes on. Eventually you'll go a few hours without thinking about it. Then a few more, and a few more. I can't wait till I can go a whole day, but it's only been 9 months for me. "I'm getting betta'"
belive me you'll be so glad you came to this forum to express your thoughts and pain. You really should read Crisis of Conscience, it'll help to eleviate the guilt, and to understand what's going on.
Take care, hope to hear more from you!
Venice
Welcome, RJB. You are no longer alone. In fact, despite the WT's trying to pretend we don't exist, inactive and ex-JW's are increasing exponentially. We understand what you're going through and we're good at listening.
I think Frenchy's bringing the refreshments this week, so just let him know what you want.
****HUGS******
Hello RJB.
I am pleased you have not given up on Jehovah. PLEASE DO NOT GIVE UP ON JEHOVAH! He will help you.
My situation contrasts vastly from yours - I am just a bible student. I have been studying for 10 months now, and when I discovered things about the WTS, I was devestated. It was like I lost someone, losing the only thing that was true to me. I still associate and study with them though.
I know precisely what you mean about the structure. Being an unbaptised bible student, I havent experienced any of the misbehaviours of the JW's. The thing that got to me was their teachings, such as 1914, Luke 17:21, world war 1, pre-announcement of God's Kingdom (there's a post by MDS on this in the Bible Research section, click http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=1244&site=3 ) false prophecies, which is what they are.
Dont worry about being alone. Jehovah will help you, just have faith.
And you have the people on this board too, they are a nice bunch.
All the best
I served as an elder and P.O. for many years. I had speaking and work assignments on the circuit and district level. I invited often by other congregations to give public discourses and I had many, many friends. Once I stopped going out in service and my meeting attendance became less than exeplarary you would think that I have the plague. There is even a rumor going around the circuit now that I am df'd.The C.O. visited our congregation this week and not a word. You would think that he would at least be interested in knowing why I am now inactive. Not a word. He and one of the elders called on another brother who stopped going to meetings even before I did but they never came to talk to me. Not a word. And as for the 'friends' that I served so long? Not a word.
Frenchy,
Believe me, they KNOW why you left.. they just aren't ready to face the truth for themselves! That's why they don't speak with you. You can bet that deep down, they KNOW. Hugs to you!
And to our newest member of the forum, Welcome! You will find warmth and acceptance here.
RCat
Edited by - Roamingfeline on 18 January 2001 19:59:27
Welcome RJB,
We got steppin'-aside from bein' an elder in common...did that about 3 years ago now...and haven't heard boo from my fellow "brothers"...been IA for about 2 years now...and very happy where I am now.
If ya ever want to talk about where a believer goes from there...I'd be happy to talk about it.
Welcome again!
Pax(Peace),
joel
Hi RJB
Nice to have you join us.
