page 28, paragraph 13:
"An improper romantic relationship could develop within the congregation. Consider this true-life example. Daniel and his wife, Sarah, were regular pioneers. Daniel was also "a never-say-no elder," as he puts it. He eagerly accepted every privilege that came his way. As part of his ministry, Daniel conducted five Bible studies with young men—three of whom got baptized. These newly baptized brothers needed considerable help.When Daniel was busy with his various theocratic assignments, Sarah often provided that help. Soon this pattern developed: Daniel’s former Bible students needed emotional support, and they received it from Sarah. She needed attention, and she got it from Daniel’s Bible students. A deadly trap had been set. "Months of my wife’s giving of herself drained her spiritually and emotionally," says Daniel. "This, coupled with the fact that I had been neglecting her, led to a disastrous turn of events. My wife committed adultery with one of my former students. She had become spiritually weak right under my nose, and I was too concerned about all my privileges even to notice it." "
Oh, wow. So...let's see if we can deconstruct. The fact that this is called a "true-life example" really does call into question the considerable number of other stories that are assumed to be true, but not called "true-life examples". This story isn't any more verifiable than any of those others. Either way, aren't ya glad this isn't in the Public Edition? I mean, what REPROACH this brings on Jehovah's name! Anyway, there are so many problems with this story.
So...Daniel didn't involve ANY brothers in his Bible studies with these young men? They didn't make any other friends other than Daniel and his wife? There were no other options but to confide in Sarah? This says an awful lot about the spirit of that congregation--where was the loving help from the rest of the elders? Or other mature brothers? And Daniel had no idea this was going on? I mean, he didn't like, come home and see her on the phone with the guy or something? Nothing?
I especially like this line:
"Daniel’s former Bible students needed emotional support, and they received it from Sarah. She needed attention, and she got it from Daniel’s Bible students. A deadly trap had been set."
What, did it have spikes shooting out of it? Oops, poor choice of words, there! Did it really have to turn deadly here? It just feels like they're jumping over something significant here. It wasn't just that Sarah needed emotional support, because she could've gotten that from other sisters, maybe even other elders--or were they too busy caring for 'theocratic privileges' as well? So tell me, what 'theocratic privileges' cause elders--whose main 'theocratic privilege' is taking care of the people in the congregation--to not have time for the people in the congregation? How were any of these privileges actually about shepherding, then?
I guarantee you, once that deadly trap snapped, three elders had hours of time to hold a judicial committee. And I'm sure they wanted to know every detail if Daniel wasn't particularly well-liked.
"Never think that your theocratic privileges are more important than your spouse," the Society says in paragraph 14. Well, you can tell them not to think it, but once they're in that position, they have a decision to make: either handle their privileges or look after their spouse. (There ain't time for both, if you're really being an elder.) If you can't do (a), then you'll have to step down, and maybe if your ego isn't in check, you might resent your wife for it. Either way, it sure puts her in a no-win situation. She has to either deal with being lonely (and evidently horny, as 'Sarah' was), or have her husband resent her for costing him his big gig as an elder. Another Watchtower score for women!
I mean, we've seen other articles where the wives are encouraged to step up and fill the gap left by their often-absent elder husband and study with the kids. Remember that photo--the elder husband in a private room taking a 'theocratic' phone call while the wife studies with the kids? Yeah, this is juuust dandy.
I have to say, this is a rather sordid story to be putting in a Watchtower. It's a little more naughty than I'm accustomed to reading there...or am I just feeling hormonal today, in that male sort of way? Well, I'm sure someone else will have created a thread on this before I can click 'Submit', but...I just had to talk about it. Probably I've missed like 50 other things in this tale, so...have at it!
--sd-7