"Turn off the TV when commercials offering physic services since it invites demos into your house".
What was the weirdest thing ever said to you as a JW?
by falseprophet 67 Replies latest jw friends
-
-
Disillusioned Lost-Lamb
You look nice today sister ______, it's too bad jehovah doesn't care what we look like.
AND
You look tired, isn't it great jehovah doesn't care about appearances.
I’m no kidding! It was everything I could do to choke back the words "Could you be more condescending and insulting?"
-
Found Sheep
that reminds me of when I got braces at 25. The co's wife said "oh that's one less thing that Jehovah has to fix in the new system" that was after she tried to make me feel guilty for getting them and I told her it was one of the best things I've done for my self esteem.
-
Disillusioned Lost-Lamb
My mom said, "My worst day in the truth is still better than a good day in the world."
Holy shit! Really?!?!?!?!
-
MrFreeze
They were talking about the whole 72 virgins in heaven thing for Islam during a book study and a brother blurted out "72 virgins? Blow me up now!"
-
Disillusioned Lost-Lamb
A couple I once knew said that their house had been demonized by a bean pot they bought a garage sale. (Hmm I didn't know deemunz liked beans)
Another lady said she though her newly built home had been demonized by stuff she bought at Goodwill because a light fixture came undone from the ceiling, so she threw out (sparlocked) everything she'd ever bough from goodwill. (Oh yes it must have been deemunz and not the shitty workmanship of the on the cheap contractors she hired.)
-
dog is god
My ex-husband said, "In the new system we won't have to wipe".
-
stillin
as an attendant, counting persons at each of the meetings came under my area of responsibility. One of the elders told me to make sure not to include any who are disfellowshipped or disassociated since, in their present state, they are "not really with us."
I said that we always count everybody at assemblies and don't bother ourselves with those things. He said "Keep up with theocratic order, brother."
-
ammo
One of the sisters and husband at our cong was invited to a bbq by their study, 'Come round have a munch and I will play guitar for you" So they went round had a great lunch and after he put on a range of records and proceeded to play AIR GUITAR for over an hour I think they listed that time as feild service.
Another mate of mine who I still see and love to bits but was always a bit naughty said to me one day "Jehovahs too busy to see all our cockups, he's only worried about the big stuff"
-