This is harder than I thought...

by SophieG 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • wasblind
    wasblind

    Good reminder GaryNeal used that July 2009 Awake myself earlier

    SophieG, jus' consider that " Food at the proper time " from brooklyn when your relatives refuse to digest it

  • Tooz
    Tooz

    There is nothing wrong with a bunch of parrots getting together and mimiking each other and their ancestors. .... That is if you are a parrot yourself.

    Not all of us like to eat crackers.

    Shoot ... many modern witnesses imply that the idea that the trinity is false was invented by the Witnesses.... just not true. Such an idea goes back to James Freeman in the 1700's ... and perhaps much farther back in time.

    (disclaimer: I'm not attempting to advocate Trintity or anti-Trintity dogmas)

  • SophieG
    SophieG

    Awww...Oracle! Thank you! I will put that offer in my back pocket.

    I already know that when I start to do certain things, they are going to go: "HUH???”. I have one family member whose fade helped ME fade…and when I speak to others it’s more about how HAPPY I am that they notice. The further away I get the more red flags will go up…but they will listen. They listened to the other family member who has left. But I am the oldest one in my set of relatives and I think it will floor them...I left before AND I am leaving AGAIN!!!???! YUP! For good!

    It’s just the blasted rhetoric…I just sit there, trying not to roll the eyes…

    Tooz: There is nothing wrong with a bunch of parrots getting together and mimiking each other and their ancestors. .... That is if you are a parrot yourself.

    HILARIOUS!!! I am over the crackers!!!

  • SophieG
    SophieG

    tresdecu: AHHH YEAH!!! Crazy pills...in theTwilight Zone!

    I just wanna go...the big A ain't coming!! Go live your life!!!

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    There is a price you have to pay for your freedom.... You are gonna have to pay one way or another.

    You want to get anyone out? its very difficult but possible and lengthy....

  • 00DAD
    00DAD

    Welcome Sophie, yes you are in a hard place.

    This is one of the most evil things about WT/JWs: they hold you hostage with your family and friends!

    It also reveals their hypocrisy:

    • "No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family." - Awake, July 2009, p. 29

    Plan your fade carefully and thoughtfully. I understand your desire to "hold a family meeting" and lay your cards on the table but that will probably just end up with you in a meeting with three elders, a subsequent disfellowshipping and the loss of association with your family.

    Be patient. Read the experiences here of others that have pulled off a successful fade. It's hard. Not everyone is successful, but it can be done.

    Welcome to the rest/best of your life!

    00DAD

  • tornapart
    tornapart

    Sophie.. I know exactly what you mean... I too have a wonderful family (and friends)... but have the same problem when they start about the FDS etc... fortunately it doesn't happen often (except my mum), usually it's complaints about stupid rules or not agreeing with things. I just try and shut my ears and keep my mouth shut. It boils inside me though!

  • SophieG
    SophieG

    CyberJesus:

    There is a price you have to pay for your freedom.... You are gonna have to pay one way or another.You want to get anyone out? its very difficult but possible and lengthy....

    Hey if they wanna stay there that's all fine by me. I am not consciously trying TRYING to get them out. When I do talk to some of my relatives I always give a realistic view of life....minus all the JWs crap. For example, I have one relative that wants to get remarried and I told her I would NEVER MARRY A JW ever again. She was like: wow...!

    00DAD:

  • "No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family." - Awake, July 2009, p. 29
  • I agree. I am going to look up that article.

    I understand your desire to "hold a family meeting" and lay your cards on the table but that will probably just end up with you in a meeting with three elders, a subsequent disfellowshipping and the loss of association with your family.

    As you guys get to know me, you'll realize that I am kinda renegade. If that ever happened I would be the most popular apostate in my area. I would be scandalous! LOL! I promise to have tongues wagging left and right!

    And I know exactly which elders I would be sitting with, I grew up with many of them. Many of them think of me as a "fleshly sister". That would be one of the funniest, eye-opening/popping (for them) experience. I may get them to follow me out. The big question would be: "WHY are are trying to leave?" I left it, came flying back and now I am ACTIVELY leaving again and DON"T PLAN on coming back >>>WHY???

    Hmmmm..... It would make them pause.

    tornapart: I just try and shut my ears and keep my mouth shut. It boils inside me though!

    Makes me want to gouge my eyes out! UGH!

  • undercover
    undercover

    Imagine me in a room with a hardcore JW family and this is what I hear...

    I honestly feel like calling a family meeting, and explaining to them...

    Of course I know this meeting will wreck havoc, blow up in my face and a bunch of people will be yelling at me and my mom will faint.

    I can relate. It's tough to keep yer yap shut sometimes, I know. But, here's what works for me:

    Imagine yourself in a room of Catholics...or Baptists...or Mormons and you hear their particular brand of looniness. You'd be less apt to jump into a theological argument with them, because, well, they have freedom of religion and a right to believe what they want. As much as it hurts, I have to recognize that my JW family have that same right...even though I know it's total BS. But then again, so is Mormonism, Catholicism and and any other religious ism you can name. I can't save all those delusional souls any more than I can JWs, so I have to let it go. Worry about myself and as long as they leave me be, I leave them be.

  • King Solomon
    King Solomon

    00DAD said:

    This is one of the most evil things about WT/JWs: they hold you hostage with your family and friends!

    It also reveals their hypocrisy:

    • "No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family." - Awake, July 2009, p. 29

    Just a heads-up as to what that sentence is actually saying (BTW, they're not being hypocritical, if you read it carefully). It's not "new light", a softening in shunning policies, etc. It's actually a prime example of Society's use of "weasel words".

    The statement says that no INDIVIDUAL is forced to become or remain a JW against their will, and that part IS true. The individual doesn't HAVE to choose between their religion and their family, because the individual (usually) won't be shunning the family.

    HOWEVER, what it DOESN'T say is that the FAMILY must respect YOUR decision to leave, and should not shun YOU. It doesn't say that, because we all know they DO have a standing obligation to NOT respect your decision to leave, and in fact they most likely WILL shun you (or else they'll be subjected to being DFed, themselves).

    Off the top of my head, I can think of no clearer example of how JWs speak with a forked-tongue, trying to appear compassionate based on telling half-truths while still delivering their poisonous, toxic message. This one sentence clearly reveals their roots as lawyers, being a cult based on legalistic concepts. Anyone who has read Orwell's 1984 should easily see the duplicitous use of language to sugar-coat a message.

    I'm reminded of the adjective used to describe the serpent in the Garden of Eden story: 'cunning'. Do you want to support a religious organization that feels compelled to treat you as a child, a fool?

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