Should I help my wife get the kids ready?

by dazed but not confused 40 Replies latest jw experiences

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  dazed but not confused

  Should I help my wife get the kids ready for meetings, service and assemblies? I haven’t been to a meeting in about 11 months and she knows I never will be back. She will give me their clothes and ask me to help get them ready for their meetings. Part of me wants to tell he “No, I don’t want to have anything to do with helping them get to the meetings.” But I also don’t want to strengthen her resolve to be a stronger witness. We have a 2 month old and a 3 year old. I don’t think she will ever open her mind to the possibility that JWs have it all wrong. We have had many conversations on what I’ve discovered. She is strong in her resolve to stay in. But I don’t want to ruin my chance at helping her to see TTATT. It doesn’t really bother me to help. What do you think? Kill her with kindness or be stubborn and not help?

  Thanks Dazed
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  leavingwt

  According to JW theology, you're the head of the household. You can insist that she not take your children to the Kingdom Hall.

  However, since you're allowing them to go to the Hall, helping her with the kids would be the polite thing to do.
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  144001

  Fortunately, I met my wife in the "world," so we would never have this issue. I would never allow my kids to enter a kingdom hall, and would be willing to spend every penny I have in a courtroom to make sure it didn't happen.
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  dazed but not confused

  leavingwt - I have considered that. Being the head of the house and not letting them go. I'm just a little lazy and love my time away from them.
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  NomadSoul

  If you're going to be lazy when it comes to your kids then why bother asking this question?
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  carla

  Why would you help your kids to develop life long problems and phobias?

  I never let my kids step foot in a kh and it would have been hell on earth for him had he really pushed it. I probably would have left the country with them and disappeared. Quit being lazy, protect your kids.

  Have you considered bringing your kids to various other faiths every other weekend? Or only allowing them every other Sunday kh meeting and YOU keeping them the other Sundays and doing something fun with them? That would be a fair thing to do, she still will not like it but you will at least be giving your kids a fighting chance of normalcy.
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  mouthy

  dazed but not confused> You should be ashamed of yourself. You enjoy being away from them....
  You ARE going to be away from them for a VERY LONG time. if you allow them to be brought up by a cult.
  You dont love them anyway. LOVE NEVER FAILS .Guess your a failure in MY opinion....
  I brought my kids up JW & now my 65 yr old kid wont speak to me. also my 40 yr old & 32 year old.grandkids... So even though yours are so young NOW when they grow up YOUR the one that will be ditched.
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  King Solomon

  Well, if you admit to thinking of it as baby-sitting, then yes, get off your lazy ass and help her get the kids ready for going to the babysitter...

  PS helping her to clean, dress and feed YOUR children is not "killing her with kindness": it called being a non-deadbeat father and a decent husband. Do it, and you meet the minimum job requirements, not win Father of the Year. Man up, dude....
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  NomadSoul

  No cutting babies in half?
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  OnTheWayOut

  I get what you were saying in the opening post, help her and she will be open to listen. Don't help her and she will see it as persecution.

  But with the added thought that you enjoy them being gone with her, it changes everything.

  Tell her (and mean it) that they are welcome to stay with you. If you won't do that, then help her get them ready to go.

  If you won't do that, be prepared for them to become JW's.