Give up the idea of going to the elders. You are a "worldly" and won't be taken seriously.
Disentangle yourself from all financial obligations and arrangements with your M-I-L and get on with your life.
How to talk to an Elder (Need help ASAP)
by okage 35 Replies latest jw friends
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elderelite
Honestly, you dont need the elders. You need a good family therapist. I hope you come to peace :)
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iamwhoiam
More than likely they will tell you "thankyou for bringing it to our attention, we will look into it"...and thats about it. Nothing will be done. I would just let it go man.
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00DAD
Okage,
Why would you want to even get the elders involved in something that is/should be none of their business in the first place?
I understand you're frustrated about a lot of things. But you're trying to control things you can't by involving people that are better left out of it.
Find your own peace. That is hard enough to do.
00DAD
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Finkelstein
Don't bother, pointless situation since your not a JW.
The elders will just take MIL side, since JWS are not to marry outside of the faith.
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okage
thank you everyone. i just want to clear up some things. my wife isnt a jw and never was. her siblings dont live under the same roof as the mother. i only live in the house because my wife was brought up to think she would be an awful human being if she strayed from the house. after we put all our money into getting this house caught up on the mortgage the mother started with the insults and backing out of financial agreements after we paid our end.
bringing the elders in would be an effort to make them staand by last years story in the watchtower where the guy was disfellowshipped and talked about how great it was that his family left him without anyone. we all remember that article because of the threat at the end...
remember that when you decide to violate gods decree...or something like that.
i already have my plan to ruin the mother. i am going to get her residency removed. by the time she comes back she wont have this house or her car. i want to make sure she loses contact with her family but the snag there is many of you pointing out that the society wont care because i am a non witness.
it might be mean but even if i downplayed the stories of the way she treated my wife you would understand. i dont usually have to include how she treats me because she is that awful to her daughter.
guess i will have to find out another route.
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Yan Bibiyan
after we put all our money into getting this house caught up on the mortgage the mother started with the insults and backing out of financial agreements
after we paid our end.
You don't happen to have any of those agreements in writing, do you?
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snare&racket
These men are not your answer.....
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NewChapter
i already have my plan to ruin the mother. i am going to get her residency removed. by the time she comes back she wont have this house or her car. i want to make sure she loses contact with her family but the snag there is many of you pointing out that the society wont care because i am a non witness.
Not healthy, Okage, although I understand the impulse. My first MIL played a large role in destroying that marriage. But listen. Good or bad, she is still your wife's mother! And if you push her to choose, you may not like the choice---no matter how upset she is, no matter how angry, no matter how much she agrees with you in theory, you cannot predict the outcome of your actions. My brothers and I have some pretty brutal fights, even to this day. But if I thought anyone would try to hurt or ruin them, I would level that person without a thought. That's just how it is.
You are in a disfunctional situation, and you are allowing your anger to eat you up. It may be justified anger, but your actions may not be justified. Get some distance. GET OUT OF THERE. Take some time to think. You are in the heat of it. Retaliation rarely brings any joy---just a lot of broken feelings.
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Cagefighter
Okage,
Why don't you be a man and stop acting like a punk? Just get a job and get a place and take care of your wife. You are acting like the b*tch you claim to hate. If you don't want to deal with Mother-in-laws then marry an orphan next time. I predict you will be single very soon. You are in for a big surprise.
-CF