Proof of adultery no longer needed to be spiritually free to remarry

by WuzLovesDubs 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    Ew...

    Wuz, I certainly hope that you're in a financial position that enables you to simply walk away from that idiot.

    He most certainly is not good enough for you, and I think he would be a 'pox' upon whichever "faithful" sister he decides to become a millstone around her neck - er, "marry"...

  • cobaltcupcake
    cobaltcupcake

    I left my husband and the organization on the same day. He asked me to let him know when I had sex with someone so that he could be free to remarry. A big part of me wanted to refuse, but based on his personality I decided to give him the evidence of my perfidy. I ran away from him because he threatened my life, so I wasn't about to give him a reason to hunt me down.

    I sent him an email. That's all he needed.

    Oh, and it happened during the day. LOL!

    http://scottleblog.wordpress.com

    The Odd Life of Jehovah's Witnesses

  • LisaRose
    LisaRose

    The WBTS rules are tricky. If everyone involved is honest it works as they intend. But divorces do not usually bring out the best in people.

    My husband was disfellowshipped. I was miserable in the marriage and would have been happy if he had cheated and would have divorced him in a New York minute. But I didn't have it in me to lie about it. It's what eventually led to my break from the JWs. I just could not believe that a loving God would want me to be miserable for the rest of my life because of one mistake I made when I was 17.

    I'm pretty sure that some lied to get a scriptural divorce. An example I heard of, a brother claimed his invalid wife confessed to adultery many years after the fact. He divorced her, stuck her in a nursing home and married his wife's former caretaker, who was much younger than him. He got away with it. Right.....sure seemed fishy.

    But that's what happens when an organization starts getting involved in peoples marriages and leaves people with no way out of an impossible situation.

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    Wuz:

    So, you no longer have to hire a private detective with a telephoto lens or resort to being a peeping tom? That's a comforting thought.

    I always thought the religion was rather twisted and cruel in this regard. Besides, I think this was mostly directed at women. They expected some poor woman to stay alone for the rest of her life. Maybe they figure an unattached woman could be exploited by all the users to do favors! What the hell do they care about her well-being?

    Meanwhile, some man would leave his wife in a heartbeat and use every excuse imaginable to free himself.

  • never a jw
    never a jw
    Yes, officially the WTS says that sex can only happen at night and not during the day.

    Blondie,

    Could you give me the reference to this unbelievable assertion?

  • hamsterbait
    hamsterbait

    NEVER_JW:

    The quote from the Shepherding the Flock Book - the post immediately above what Blondie says is the proof quote.

    Scans of this are freely available - I am amazed that you are too bone idle to search for yourself and find it. But then most JWs are mentally lazy.

    Whenever Elders did a stake out to spy on suspected wrongdoers it was always at night. (At least in the cases I personally know of the Elders sat in a car outside all night.)

    Of course they were SOOOO concerned about the safety and cleanness of the flock they were not willing to sacrifice even one hours pay to see if the suspect was having sex in the lunch hour.

    HB

  • Scully
    Scully

    wuzLovesDubs, my dear friend,

    If it were me, and my soon-to-be ex-hubby wanted me to admit that *I* committed adultery while he'd been out tomcatting around and lining up Mrs. #2, my answer to him would be "no, NO, and HELL-NO!".

    I would *never* give him that satisfaction. Let him do the deed and take the consequences. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. That's not how things work in JW-land.

    I'm laughing my butt off that it took a talking-to by the Elders™ to get it through his thick skull that his behaviour is totally inappropriate. Well, duh! Just shows how seriously he takes his belief system, because if he took it seriously he would have known that before he started scoping for a new lady friend.

    I'm sorry that you have been married to a d!¢khead. We still love you though.

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    Well, DUH.

    HE confesses, takes his six month lumps sitting at the back of the congregation, gets reinstated, and badda bing, badda boom, he can remarry.

  • LisaRose
    LisaRose

    Never a JW, I think Blondie is referring to the previous post (that quoted a Watchtower directive) that stated there had to be two witnesses to the fact the mate stayed the night with a member of the opposite they coule sex. In other words a "nooner" cannot be used to prove adultery.

  • blondie
    blondie

    However, remember that judicial committees will accept as proof of immorality two witnesses to the fact that the accused "stayed all nightin the same house with a person of the opposite sex (or a known homosexual) under improper circumstances." (Shepherd the Flock of God, p. 129, emphasis theirs).

    neverajw, here is why I say that. If two witnesses see that a jw stays all day in the same house with a person of the opposite sex, then the judicial committee does not assume that sex took place without 2 witnesses to the sex. But if it is ALL NIGHT, they they do assume that sex took place (improper circumstances) without 2 eyewitnesses to the sex and can disfellowship, cast out this person unless these elders determine the person is truly repentant.

    Unchaperoned in the same house all night = sex took place without eyewitnesses to that fact an assumption that sex only takes place at night

    Unchaperoned in the same house all day = no judicial action because the assumption is that sex does not take place during the day

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