At This Point In Your Life Would You Care If You Were Disfellowshipped or Disassociated?

by minimus 45 Replies latest jw friends

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  Captain Obvious

  Ok, I'll bite Elephant.

  No, there's not a huge difference. It doesn't matter to most, and the announcement is the same. DAing would be easier, the letter wouldn't have to go into any detail, it just has to state that you no longer wish to be a member, or be recognized as a JW. Even an unbaptized pub. Can do this, though there is no need.

  A DFing involves Judicial committees, which aren't pleasant for anybody, and could possibly be with men you've been close with for many years. As stated above, the JC arrangement is not only unscriptural, it violates human rights in many countries. If a country were to have a legal system that runs like JWs, it would be nothing short of a corrupt tyranny.

  This thread isn't about the difference the question asked would you care if you were - like if you've completely successfully faded to the point that your life would hardly change if they made an announcement in your old cong.

  Elephant strikes again
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  dazed but not confused

  I would want to go out on my terms not theirs. If I knew I was going to be D’fd I would write a D’a letter to beat them to the punch. My wife is very supportive of me and my decision even though she would prefer I come back to the borg. I have very little to loose either way. My mom and sister live 20 hours away via car and know I left a yr ago. They still talk to me. If they found out I was D’fd or D’a I think they would talk to me but in a more limited way. My MIL lives down the street from me and watches our kids while we work. She, I believe, would treat me the same way as she always has. She’s a great MIL and I couldn’t have picked a better family to be apart of. I think my own mom would shun me long before the MIL. My FIL has been inactive for 15+ years and I think that helps with her being cool about the situation. I only have one friend that speaks to me from the hall and if I was D’fd or D’a he would probably not speak to me.

  I told my wife that I want to raise our kids in as balanced a way that we can. I told her that they will be celebrating the holidays as long as they wanted to with me. My son may spill the beans (to the local BOE or cong) abt this as he is very excited to celebrate Halloween this year. It doesn’t matter to me if he does. In my opinion they only have as much “authority” over me as I give them. I no longer believe in their god or Christ as our savior. I have ended that chapter of my life and am moving on as best I can.

  In fact an elder from the hall left me a voice mail last night saying “ I just wanted to touch base with you and talk about a couple things.” I haven’t called him back and don’t plan to. I told my wife that he called. I said to her… “the circuit overseer must be coming soon?” and she said “yes he is here now. Why do you ask?” I told her he called and probably did so out of obligation. She just said "oh".This is the first time in about 9 months that they tried to contact me.
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  dazed but not confused
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  hoser

  @ James_Woods For what it may be worth, I actually FORCED them to DF me. They begged me to just write a quiet letter of DA back in the late 1970s and I refused to do it.

  I am resolved of this too. I would demand to see my accusers in person and would probably appeal the decision if it wasn't in my favour

  hoser
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  BlindersOff1

  vvv
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  stillajwexelder

  too many family in so yes