Rules in the New System

by King Solomon 50 Replies latest social humour

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  King Solomon

  OK, so even if laws are to be written on people's hearts vs spelled out into lawbooks, there's going to HAVE to be SOME laws in the New System of Things, right? I say we get the ball rolling and brainstorm what they should be: after all, none of us got invited to the party anyway but since there just ain't going to be any party, why let that spoil our fun?

  So, the theme is laws to be in effect in the New System. I'll kick it off:

  * intentionally slamming the door on someone else is considered the highest insult possible (even worse than flipping the bird) and is an instant death penalty offense (it brings back painful memories for so many).

  Next!
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  sizemik

  Always give way to traffic on your right . . . some hearts may be lefties.
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  rip van winkle

  Only one paper towel allowed per person in any public restroom. (Yes, Sol,. It is indeed a NEW law. It was previously just a rule to consider!)
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  jam

  The early bird gets the worm. If I find a home in the hills of

  Malibu overlooking the ocean, damn,t its mine.
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  King Solomon

  Lol, Jam. I suppose that's one benefit of going out regularly in FS: covering the territory to make mental notes of which properties are worthy of snagging. If only the householders knew they were really casing the joint, and thinking of how they'd redecorate it after they moved in...

  Rip, kinda sobering when you think of it like a DC that lasts for an eternity... Not so fun, eh?

  Sizemik, international traffic rules at last! None of that "we drive on the left side vs you drive on right side" nonsense.
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  Found Sheep

  who will make paper towels? no one alive has an education?
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  rip van winkle

  The only animal you can choose to keep as a pet is either a tiger or a lion. No ligers allowed.
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  rip van winkle

  You can somberly commemorate the Great Tribulation, but you can CELEBRATE the Anniversary of Armageddon with a lavish party- but you still can't drink the wine- only reserved for the anointed ruling class!
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  King Solomon

  Found sheep, god can do manna: he shouldn't have a problem making paper towels!

  Rip, sounds about right... In fact, ALL designer animals will be forbidden, especially designer dogs! Labradoodles, Cockapoodles, Doberhuahuas, etc: all will be prohibited! God doesn't want or need man's help designing anything, so it's strictly hands-off!
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  talesin

  There will be NO books!