Witness Self Hatred

metatron

I do wonder if the average Witless has been beat down with so much
propaganda that they hate themselves. Consider how they are so
willing to blame themselves for anything - and react fanatically
to defend the organization, inspite of obvious wrongs.

I was thinking about this in regard to the Bryant case - and
disfellowshippings generally - why is there so little anger at
the elders involved?

Why does a man like Bryant choose to kill his family
- but not choose anger against his tormentors,
who wrecked his life and business? Is this just a 'now they'll
get to Paradise' thing?

I don't think I've ever heard of elders being afraid for
their physical safety in df'ing someone - why? are their victims so
successfully brainwashed with guilt that this never occurs?

I'm not advocating anything here - just wondering if
this same meek obsequiousness is a victim's mentality
that has afflicted women and minorities in history-
If so, perhaps the attitude that "I guess I deserved
this" may change ..... with enlightenment in regard to
the corruption of those in power and their secret tribunals.

metatron

dungbeetle

It's only a matter of time, Metatron....

UADNA-US (Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America-United States)

rhett

Personally, I always hated the elders that gave me shit back when I was a JW. I never did anything physical to them because I know they're so petty they'd call the cops (funny how that "don't involve authorities" thing is only selectively applied) but I must admit I'd get a pretty good kick out of seeing either of them hit by a bus. If anyone feels like sharing this with them please feel free to contact Ken Goans ( [email protected]) and/or Jeff Bivens (don't know his email address) in Evansville, Indiana. Its been years but I still can't stand those two jerks.

I don't feel like Satan but I am to them.

BoozeRunner

The brainwashing taps into so many aspects of the Witness psyche-theres the persecution complex, in which Dubs imagine that all outside really give em more than passing notice and will persecute them in various ways. To a Dub, an employer saying "I cant give you Friday off to attend your convention" is percieved as persecution or a test from Satan.

The OTHER end of that spectrum is the "I failed in some way, thats why I am DF'd. Its MY fault, I wasnt good enough, but I will humble myself and make it back." The difficulty involved in such(especially if one is not in "the CLIQUE"), is tremendous. It becomes a vicious cycle, and IMHO, can lead to self-loathing. The constant barrage of, "TRY HARDER" is truly a beating.

Kinda reminds ya of the Pharisees, don't it?

Boozy

Gopher

Meta,

You suggested that the sheep who display self-hatred are brainwashed into feeling that way.

If so, then the elders are also subtly influenced by the accumulation of teachings (i.e., brainwashed) into browbeating their flock in that manner. It seems like a stage play, already written with the outcome determined. That's why I don't stay mad at the individual elders, they're only carrying out what they are "rewarded" for doing.

The system and the Society that stands behind it seems to be the greatest source of harm here. They teach everyone to subjugate love for the greater good of "Mother Organization". Bryant felt helpless against the large wheels of the organization, so he turned his anger inward.

-J.R., member UADNA-M (Unseen Apostate Directorate North America - Minnesota division)

This post was not evaluated by any mental health professionals.
Any opinions expressed are those of a fuzzy, cuddly rodent.

rhett

I don't care why an elder does whatever it is he may do, he's still the one that does it. Doesn't matter if he's told to or if he's rewarded or not, he's making the conscience decision to be a jerk and ruin a person's life so I will stay angry at them individually. I know I was a jerk when I was a JW and I take full responsibility for every single one of my actions. Doesn't matter what I was told or how I was treated for them, if I was a jerk to someone, I was a jerk. Learn how to take some personal responsibility people.

I don't feel like Satan but I am to them.

detective

From what I've seen, I think there is something of a chain reaction of self-loathing which begins at the highest ranks and filters downward to rank and file.

I've known people who are deeply self-loathing who then turn around and belittle, emotionally blackmail or insult to manipulate others into conformity. I suppose this could happen with people who are self-loathing and NOT JWs, but I absolutely think the group structure and stresses contribute heavily to the problem.

I think the "high" of being unique and special is ultimately outweighed by the "low" of not being unique or special enough to be worthy. Hence, self-loathing.

Gopher

So, because I have "let go" of my anger toward the elders, I am evading personal responsibility?

The two don't go hand-in-hand. The issue here is what causes self hatred, and I believe the "group think" mentality of JW's takes otherwise good people and turns them against each other and against themselves.

True, we all bear personal responsibility for the effects of our actions. No argument there.

But for me to "get on" with my life, I have had to mentally forgive the elders who mistreated me, almost feel sorry for them, really.

-J.R., member UADNA-M (Unseen Apostate Directorate North America - Minnesota division)

This post was not evaluated by any mental health professionals.
Any opinions expressed are those of a fuzzy, cuddly rodent.

MavMan

The elders that were involved in my judicial committee were very loving with me. I had a very challenging attitude toward them. I believe they did not want to disfellowship me, but I gave them no choice, I never showed any repentance. At that time I really was not repentant, as I was so involved in sin that I did not care anymore about anyone else but myself. After some time, I started to feel depressed about my spiritual condition. I had degraded myself to a very low level by constantly sinning against Jehovah. I am now trying to make changes in myself and constantly ask Jehovah for his help.

I feel bad for those that were mistreated by elders. At one time I was attending a congregation that only had one elder (they had two and one suddenly moved to another state). When that elder was left alone in the congregation, he was a nightmare. He hurt me very much with strong words, it lasted six months and then the C.O. and D.O. paid a visit to the congregation and removed him. I felt relief when this happened. After that, three new elders moved in and they were very loving and cared for the flock nicely.

Stephanus

Mavman:

The elders that were involved in my judicial committee were very loving with me. I had a very challenging attitude toward them. I believe they did not want to disfellowship me, but I gave them no choice, I never showed any repentance. At that time I really was not repentant, as I was so involved in sin that I did not care anymore about anyone else but myself. After some time, I started to feel depressed about my spiritual condition. I had degraded myself to a very low level by constantly sinning against Jehovah. I am now trying to make changes in myself and constantly ask Jehovah for his help.

Is this yet another manifestation of YoyoMama?

Witness Self Hatred

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