Can they disfellowship my father?

by cookiemaster 31 Replies latest jw experiences

  • cookiemaster
    cookiemaster

    This has nothing to do with my Facebook endeavors. When the elders visited us last week, they also discussed my father. My mother called them about him. He got drunk a few times. I have no problem with that, because I don't care. However, he does beat the shit out of animals. My mother fed a stray dog last autumn and when he saw her, he ran with a baseball bat to hit the dog. My mother tried to stop him and he tackled her and gave her a few slaps.

    I was at college at the time but when I found out I was so furious I wanted to beat the shit out of him. Anyway, my mother wouldn't allow me to do that because she said seeing something like that it would kill her, as she has a heart condition. A few weeks ago, he kicked my mother's pregnant cat, almost killing her. I shouted at him "What the hell are you doing?! Killing the cat?!". He approached me and threw a punch. I grabbed him by the neck and lifted him from the ground. My mother immediately got between us and cried until we stopped fighting.

    We haven't spoken to each other since. I hate the guy. He abused my mother and countless animals all his life. When she called the elders, I thought it might be a good thing for them. That they might talk him into chilling out a bit, to stop hitting animals. She also told them about his drinking, but that's irrelevant to me as he's not violent when drunk. Now, they called him tomorrow for a judicial committee. Will they disfellowship my father?

    I wouldn't want that, because he'd blame my mother that would make things so much worse. I wouldn't even be able to leave home, out of fear that he might retaliate on her. I never knew the idiots would react so seriously. I thought my mother would just tell them about the fighting and they'd scold him for that, but no they took it to the next level. What do you think will happen? Can I threaten them with a lawsuit to prevent them from disfellowshipping him? Don't get me wrong, I want my parents to leave this cult, but not like this.

  • Village Idiot
    Village Idiot

    Of course they can disfellowship him and they should. You should consider the option of a separation for your mother and even a court order.

    One thing's for sure. He won't change.

  • finally awake
    finally awake
    he needs to be in jail. and anger management therapy. your mom needs to get the heck out of there and so do you. he isn't going to get better, only worse, and someone is going to end up seriously injured or dead.
  • 3rdgen
    3rdgen

    Your mother is in two abusive relationships. The Watchtower and your father. I applaud your concern for her but keeping your parents together under the circumstances is a mistake. Disfellowshipping is not the real problem here the abuse is.

    Help her get in touch with a women's shelter. Help her to value herself enough not to allow herself or her animals to be abused. He needs serious councelling and so does she. Help her find safety AWAY from your father/ abuser.

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath
    what a fine upstanding member of the congregation.
  • truthseeker100
    truthseeker100
    I would be very careful dealing with anyone who beats innocent animals. Make sure that he doesn't have access to firearms. He's got a lot of pent up rage.
  • CloseTheDoor
    CloseTheDoor

    Yes, they can disfellowship him if they want to. If I was in a situation like that, I would protect by mom by getting her away from him if at all possible.

  • freemindfade
    freemindfade

    If I saw anyone hitting an animal with a bat they'd be going to the ER...

  • cookiemaster
    cookiemaster
    We're in Europe, so there's no guns. Since I grabbed him by the neck, he has chilled out, mostly. He only hit my mother a few times in their marriage, but they argued constantly for the past 20 years or so. What I can't stand is his animal abuse. His aggression towards both pets and farm animals has been a constant reason for conflict in our family. Disfellowshipping him would only make things worse, as he'd be more resentful of my mother. He often shouts at us to go away, but there's nowhere to go as my mother's family it's all be out of touch for decades due to her being a JW. She refuses to leave him anyway. I'm hoping that if I show more aggression towards him when he misbehaves, he'll improve his behavior. The man's in his 60's by now, so it's not like he could actually take me down in a fight. Anyway, I hope things improve. He's been awfully quiet since I almost beat him last time.
  • Giordano
    Giordano
    Your dad is insane, what you describe him doing goes way beyond anger problems. You should have him arrested for animal cruelty.

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