Long time Lurker, ready to join in...

by Blackbird Singing 38 Replies latest jw friends

  • Blackbird Singing
    Blackbird Singing

    Hi All, I'm a long time lurker, ready to join in and add my two cents worth now and then! I was in the religion for 25 years, out now for 8, along with my husband, daughter, and son! I would have to say pretty much the whole time I was in I didnt want to be, pretty much "dreaded" all aspects of it, meetings, service, assemblies, and TALKS, I hated talks, man o man would i be grouchy the whole week I had a scheduled talk.

    We didnt have much family in, but lots of friends and many JW employees, pretty much lost all that, down to just one JW employee left(thats a good thing). We have never been DF"d, I feel because they probably knew my husband would do whatever in his power to file a Lawsuit. The elders never once tried to contact me, not quite sure why,probably because I was very verbal, not very submissive and did threaten a time or two that I would be contacting authorities if they did not "handle" the child abuse thats goes on in most halls( you know, the poor little kid screaming in the bathroom, comes out a few minutes later with a red hand mark across face)! Also threatened that if they said my sons name in a 'local needs" part about defiant teenagers(he was only 13) that I would be contacting my attorney, anyway were all out, all of us have some level of PTS, but my son has fared the worst, yep I really screwed him up, raising him in that religion, biggest regret of my life, but I can see him starting to come along a bit and working hard with him to learn good coping skills for his severe depression etc., Thank- You all for all the good information and for being here for me(even if you didnt realize it)! Looking forward to joining in, BBS

  • clarity
    clarity

    Wow, congratulations on your escape!

    That takes guts and an extreme amount of energy,

    absurd isn't it ... a preposterous, off the wall cult!

    Lovely to see you on here, glad your family is together.

    clarity

  • ScenicViewer
    ScenicViewer

    Welcome Blackbird Singing,

    It's always great to hear a success story that the entire family is out. No stress and worry about shunning from family; what a life saver that is!

    Looking forward to your posts.

  • ldrnomo
    ldrnomo

    Welcome, glad to have you in our community

  • Giordano
    Giordano

    Welcome Blackbird Singing! Great name by the way. So glad your out with your entire family.

    JW's count on one another for their validation. 'They know themselves chiefly by hearsay.'

    When you leave they lose sight of you immediately. Which actually is a good thing.

  • 00DAD
    00DAD

    Welcome, great to hear your story too!

    Your contributions may help some other lurkers have courage.

    00DAD

  • Clam
    Clam

    welcome BB singing.

    I like your tough "I'm not taking any sh*t" attitude, and it sounds like they didn't have the stomach to take you on.

    I hope your son pulls through this difficult period.

  • King Solomon
    King Solomon

    Welcome aboard, and I'm sure we're all looking forward to hearing you sing in the dead of night.

    You offer a valuable perspective, being that you've been free for 8 years!

  • FadeToBlack
    FadeToBlack

    Welcome! New here too (30+ years in, no meeting for 3 months = just getting started). Thankfully, my son got out on his own 10 or so years ago. He moved to another area and just drifted away. I begged him not to get baptized. Then he was a pioneer for a year or two. I should have acted on my doubts a long time ago. We are still talking, but I don't think he knows I am out. He always knew I was just going thru the motions.

    I agree with what 00DAD said. We need to encourage more lurkers to get off the fence. So many lives and family bonds ruined.

  • Blackbird Singing
    Blackbird Singing

    Thank-You all for the Welcomes, I do appreciate it, I hope that i can be of help to others, Sometimes it feels surreal that were out, I never in a million years thought my husband would leave also!! The last 8 years have not been all rosy thats for sure, lots of adjustments and searching but were getting there.....Thanks Again, BBS

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