welcome to the board, I too have many family in!!!
But, I'm mentally free and that's all that matters!
good luck
p.s. watch out for the JW employees, foresee problems and nip them early!
Yet another intro letter
by problemaddict 31 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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cult classic
Hi there, problemaddict. Like the name.
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BlindersOff1
welcome
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dontplaceliterature
Welcome, problemadditct!
I have been inactive for a bit longer than you (was a MS and quit cold turkey, not DFd). My wife still goes and we have a toddler - she disagrees with several issues, but doesn't feel it's worth giving up the friends. You are among friends here who have shared a similar experience to yours. Feel free to PM me anytime.
Best of luck with your ongoing journey. It's incredibly hard, but it is the course of honor!
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LisaRose
Welcome, its nice to read stories like this where JWs are questioning things not because they were treated bad but just because they see the problems with the religion. I have been out many years and I have never been happier since leaving. I was in for 30 years.
I hope everything goes well with your exit.
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jwfacts
Welcome.
My wife is essentially in agreement with me on many things, but wants there to be a moral structure for our children...
That is a common concern, however not valid. Morality is not the sole domain of the Watchtower. You can raise moral children outside the confines of the religion, and will then be setting them up for morals that will remain for life. Watchtower morals are destroyed on leaving the religion, and have to be rebuilt from scratch. Since 2/3 JW children leave, it is likely yours will leave and have no respect for the Watchotwer morals they have been taught.
Further, many JW children lead double lives, so staying in the organisation does not guarantee they will have a moral structure provided from moral friends. The JW children I grew up with went in all directions, including drug dealing, addiction, suicide, and jail.
I have friends that continued as JWs for several years simply for the sake of the child, and then realised that since they were irregular the child ended up with no friends either JW or nonJW.
I would suggest introducing them to good non-JW friends and morals based on education will be better in the long term.
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problemaddict
Again everyone, I appreciate the support. I realy do. I hope to be able to contribute to the community in a unique way.
@DaCheech - The employees are kind of in a unique spot. They are younger than me and free to leave. I haven't gone to any extremees yet, and as far as they know I am just a "free thinker" of sorts. If they quit, we would hire other people. My employees while valued, hold no real control over my buisness.
@DPL - I will PM you. Seems like we have similar situations which really is nice to know. Even though you know it may not be true, it is easy to think of yourself on an island.
@Lisarose - Yes I don't have particularly negative situations being my reason for having doubts and acting on them, but truth be told one in particular was a catalyst for my issues currently. It made me awake to the idea that I had given a stranger, a complete moron, power over my life and my life decisions, even though I didn't mean to. I decided to take a step back and see that the only way to not make it about ME, was to be able to do some proper research.
@jwfacts - I appreciate the response. You have put much work into funneling your viewpoints. I agree that the JW's have no real high moral authority on which to stand. In dealing with my wife however, I have someone who got the best of the organizations offerings, without all the fat if you get my meaning. So her reality is different that most of ours. She is from another country. All the family, cousins, children, are all loyalists and generally good people. While my experience is more akin to yours. This is why personla experience has to be taken out of the equation in order to effect real and permanent change. Trust me my man, I am only a month or so removed from the idea that I could do more from the inside trying to make a change. My self deception is not that far in the rear view mirror. :)
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creativhoney
Hmm. Because you can't have a moral structure for your children without the meetings ....
Where kids grow up and learn to be deceitful have guilt and feel like bad people. :(
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creativhoney
In fact I said it lazily but jwfacts mirrors what I was thinking on that point.
My son is 16 - he's a moral and sensible boy - best of all he isn't leading a double life
he doesn't have to! I've watched all my nephews/nieces go thrugh so many issues and be I trouble for lying about things that should just be normal for teenagers!
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creativhoney
And as jwfacts pointed out the worst kind of upbringing is where the family aren't really in it but just go along. The kids are brought up with a whole lot of restrictions and no reason why! My nephews family don't even go to meetings but their child won't be allowed to be involved in holidays and celebrations at school . What's the point in making their kids suffer and be singled out? :( x x