How to help a friend who has left the truth!!1

caswinchester

I was after any advice or suggestions about how to support a friend who was born and raised in the truth, my friend is now 22 and has tried to fade out but his parents are having a hard time accepting this, don't get me wrong i understand why they are, but the stress and pressure he is under is taking it's toll on him.

I have tried to be there for him as i use to study with the Jehovah witness's some years ago but i don't think i can or will ever truly understand what it's like to be born into a family of Jehovah witness, i understand why his parents are shunning him and they only talk to him when they think they have come up with away to get him to go back to truth.

i would like to hear any real life exsperances and how you where there and helped a friend deal with leavign the truth and accepting that your family will most likely never going to talk to you again.

caswinchester

Satanus

There are a few here who are doing this and a few who have. I'm sure they will chime in. One thing that would help him immensmy to deal, is coming onto the board, himself. Welcome, btw. Good, that you're trying to help him.

S

whathappened

Tell him to approach it on an emotional level. Remember, they truly believe he is commiting certain suicide by leaving the organisation, as Jehovah will soon destroy all who appose him. (apposing Jehovah and apposing the Watchtower Society seen as the SAME THING!) They love him and are practicing tough love. It isn't easy for them to shun him.

He needs to ask them how he is supposed to cope with finding out the Society is not God's organisation, humbly explaining the whys and how.

Heaven

Welcome caswinchester. I feel for your friend. It is tough to lose family this way. If he is willing to sign up here it might be a good idea.

Also, is your friend going to College or University? What are your friends plans for the future? What are his interests? Getting him involved in groups that he has interests in may be helpful.

It might be good for him to seek some counseling as well.

jgnat

By the way, I never refer to it as "leaving the truth", even in my mind. That plants a suggestion that the leaving is more momentous than it should be. He's leaving an organization that no longer suits him.

Truth is not something you can "leave". It stands on it's own. It follows that the WTS is not the exclusive rights holder on the "truth".

DesirousOfChange

He probably should not debate what he sees wrong about the doctrines. (Right Chris, Blacksheep?)

Instead, he should only ask questions concerning the things that are confusing to him and that he does not understand. Then sit back and let THEM explain it to him. It would help if you gave us an idea of the things that helped open his eyes about TTAATT.

Tell him not to let them jump from subject to subject when they are stumped. Stop the conversation and tell them to get back to him on the original subject.

Doc

caswinchester

Hi Heaven

He is currently working full time and really loves his job but he is also working with an ex jehovah witness who was also born and raised in the truth they have been friends for 10yrs talking with this friends does tend to help a little.

snare&racket

HasHs he got a life planned out?

encourage him to make steps towards a new life, ask him what he always wanted to be and excite him with all the possibilities available to him.

Encourage him to make new friends and to get in touch with old school pals!

Reassure him he is still young and has not lost too much yet to the cult, highlight long time JWs who have given decades, whole lives to the corp.

Just be there for him, perhaps encourage him to come here. Its a lonely experience, you dont bump into many ex-jws that left willingly, it is nice to come here and see your fears, feelings, dicoveries and experiences shared by others...

snare x

all the best and please feel free to pm me if you would like me to be someone he can talk to etc

Black Sheep

Instead, he should only ask questions concerning the things that are confusing to him and that he does not understand.

Wrong. Never do that. Only ever ask a question when you know what the accepted 'answer' is, why it is wrong and how to demonstrate it is wrong using literature that the JW gives lip service to trusting and has access to.

Your friend has to fully understand that this church is NOT 'The Truth'. Never use the term when you talk to him, and pull him up on it when he uses it. It isn't The Truth, it never was The Truth and the JWs are not the only cult that uses The Truth as a noun to describe their set of doctrines.

Also, it isn't Jehovah's Organisation. It never was and there is not a single instance when Jehovah has ever done anything that the church hierarchy has predicted he would, so it follows that he hasn't left Jehovah, or Jehovah's Organisation.

All he left was a church. Call it that. It wasn't even a church he chose. His parents chose to raise him in a church with over a hundred years of failed prophetic mumbo jumbo that is warned against in any Bible you choose in Deuteronomy 18:20-22. According to that scripture, it is not him that should be justifying leaving, it is his parents that should be justifying staying, or they should just back off and apologise. Your friend has nothing to apologise for.

How to help a friend who has left the truth!!1

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