Welcome, HillCountry, to the the forum! Your heartfelt, intelligent words are much appreciated.
We look forward to hearing more from you.
CoCo
Hi! Life story of young, 23-year-old (gay), disassociated, non-baptized publisher
by HillCountry 29 Replies latest jw friends
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Heartofaboy
Hello HillCountry, your post wasn't too long at all!!
I can appreciate everything you have told us as I too grew up gay & JW.
It is a struggle isn't it?
I saw psychiatrists when I was in my 20's, I tried to keep the JW's out of it as I didn't want to 'bring reproach on the organisation'. This wasn't fair on the psychiatrists or me. When I finally came clean & truly opened up to them they could not believe what a gay JW has to contend with. They thought my faith was incredibly strong whereas inside I felt the lowest of low when hearing some of the homophobic rantings in the Kingdom Hall.
You are lucky you are still young, it took me til my late 50's to realise the borg is not God directed & has no hold over me or my faith.
I'm sure you will find the love of your life.
If you feel like telling us more.................
Hoab (((((big hug))))
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LouBelle
Hello HllCountry - thank you for sharing your story and it brought tears to my eyes because it reminded me of a very good friend I had when I was in the truth. Good looking boy and I absolutely adored him - always said I'd marry him, however I had a suspician he was gay (I have quite good gaydar as I have a number of gay friends). He went out with a girl - more to cover up his sexuality. Like you he never got baptized.
I got disfellowshipped and we kept in touch here and there, I couldn't visit at his home as he stayed with his JW family and then moved quite far away. I told him before I left that when he was ready I would be there for him no matter what.
That chap phoned me and told me he had come out to his family and that they were so upset. He remembered how close we were and wanted to meet for coffee. It was so good to him again and for him to be truly himself made me so happy. I could see the relief in his eyes that he saw no judgement from me. I got to meet his partner and they are still together 7 years later.
Be comfortable with who you are. One day if you do meet someone, I'm sure you will, you will have to address those issues, but start building your confidence about it now.
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InquiryMan
Wonderful story LouBelle :-)
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HillCountry
I wanna thank everyone for their kind words. It helps to know that I wasn't the only one going through what I went. Thank y'all.
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perfect1
Hey Hill Country.
Cheers my dear! I hope you find love, happiness, and fun!
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james_woods
The story certainly shows the absolute wisdom of not baptising children until they are grown up and can make their own decisions.
The poster would be in twice as much deep water if he had gotten baptised.
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Billy the Ex-Bethelite
Welcome HillCountry!
I'm glad to hear that you were able to dodge the dunk and have gotten out while still young.
"Will I fall in love with someone and be happy? What will my family say if I ever have a boyfriend or partner? Given that marriage may actually be a possiblity in the future, would I be emotionally ready to wed?"
Unless this is actually your real picture...
...you can look forward to a happy future.
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undercover
The story certainly shows the absolute wisdom of not baptising children until they are grown up and can make their own decisions.
The poster would be in twice as much deep water if he had gotten baptised.
Also shows the indoctrination that one goes through, even when not 100% fully accepting the notion that the JW religion is the one true religion. Even when questioning and doubting what was taught, you still come away with some of their wacky teachings attached to you and your thought process.
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Dagney
Welcome HillCountry! I really enjoyed your story...thank you for posting it.
The best thing you can do is to do what is right for you. If you try to live your life with someone else's ideals/preferences, you will end up miserable and having to sort things out again and again. If you decide things for yourself, with your own conviction, whatever it may be, you will be stronger and healthier for the rest of your life. It may not be easy or simple...but nothing in this life rare is.
Don't rush, figure out what you want...and good luck!
We look forward to your posts and updates!
