I Thing Being Friends With My Jehovah Witness Friend is Taking A Mental Toll On Me? (page 2)

mrsjones5

Sometimes friends don't say friends. It sounds like you don't really want to end this friendship but it might be best for your peace of mind to do so. Your priority should not be to change or prove anything to her but to take care of you.

Kojack57

Your friend will only try to convert you to her Cult. If you refuse you will be history. My advise is to find a non j.w. friend who won't make your friendship conditional upon membership.

Kojack

wha happened?

YA never know. I had to put distance between a JW friend and I. Things cooled off for about a year. He came around. We just don't talk about it at all

00DAD

Something's not right here. How could you be "BBF's" for a year and she not know you aren't a JW?

JW's aren't even supposed to have friends that aren't JW's!

How do you know each other?

Sounds like YOU think you're Best Friends TM but she's looking at you as a potential Bible Study.

Honeybucket

Dont let a possibility of a friendship change your beliefs. I did that! I was friends with some witnesses when I was a early teen and they all convinced me to do a bible study. I did, babtized and they werent my friends anymore. Good friends are hard to find, unfortunately WItnesses dont make good friends. You are a "work friend". Which translates into "they are nice for a wordly person, but work is as far as it goes" Dont expect to be able to hang out together. You should take the labels she puts on you, and apply them to her. That way you can mentally seperate her from your other friends. A prospective friend is not worth it.. trust me. Ask her to stop talking religion with you, if she doesnt go to HR. Witnesses feel that with their religion they have no boundries, they love beating a dead horse. Also they feel they have the right to this, and when you dont want to hear it anymore, they feel it satan that has closed your ears to the truth. Plus not being in her religion, she views you as pretty dead, also there is no point building a friendship with someone who only has a short time to live. You dont build her up spiritually and you are marked BaD BAD BAD! You will be demonized. Sorry..it sucks but you'll thank us later.

Sincerly,

Not blowing anymore smoke! aka honeybucket

TheNurseInBlack

We met at school. At school we've never discussed religion or anything she even calls me her best friend and comes to me about her troubles. She's always been a Jehovah witness since birth. And I don't have a religion. We have been friends for 4yrs now but at first she didn't bring up religious meanings until she realized that we didn't share the same beliefs.

And thank you everyone else who's answered me.

It's kinda depressing though. When I do win a debate all she does is say "I'll research it" and never brings it up again.

Lozhasleft

Why not tell her openly that you care about her but you really don't want to discuss religion anymore? Say you respect her right to choose hers but you don't want to be involved in it at all.

Loz x

happy@last

I just think she is trying to conform to being a 'good JW' and in order to maintain your friendship would love you to be one too. As good friends you need to say that you'll each need to respect that you have different views on religion and it's best not to discuss the subject

blondie

I take it you are not a jw and never have been associated as a "bible study" or are an unbaptized person raised in a jw family.

jws are discouraged from having a friendship with a non-jw unless they are trying to convert you. Do you have non-jw interests in common? I would try to bring the conversation back to one of those and choose not to have religions discussions that you have have had more than once with her. She sounds like she is still stuck in the true believer state. The best you can do is share a question for thought and not make it a contest of who is right and who is wrong.

*** w11 6/15 p. 32 “Make Your Way Successful”—How? ***

I broke off association with worldly friends at the club and sought out friends in the congregation

*** w96 5/15 pp. 30-31 Are You a Balanced Pioneer? ***

Consider Hisako, a pioneering mother of three. What did she do when her oldest daughter began to display a lack of joy and enthusiasm for Christian meetings and field service because of the pull of worldly school friends? The real need was for her daughter to make the truth her own and become fully convinced that separateness from the world was the best course.—James 4:4.

*** w94 2/15 p. 23 Keep Your Distance When Danger Threatens ***

Some Christians have gone astray by getting too involved in business activities, by cultivating close friendships with worldly associates,

*** w93 4/15 p. 16 par. 9 Youths—What Are You Pursuing? ***

So keep clear of unwholesome associates. Limit your association to spiritually minded Christians who really love Jehovah. Be careful even of youths in the congregation who are negative or critical. As you grow spiritually, your taste in friends will likely change. Says one teenage Witness girl: “I have been making new friends in different congregations. It has made me realize how unnecessary worldly friends are.”

*** w93 8/1 p. 19 par. 17 Let No One Spoil Your Useful Habits ***

Some worldly neighbors and relatives may be friendly and helpful, though they have consistently shown neither interest in spiritual things nor love for righteousness. (Mark 10:21, 22; 2 Corinthians 6:14) Our becoming Christians should not mean that we become unfriendly, unneighborly. Jesus counseled us to manifest genuine interest in others. (Luke 10:29-37) But equally inspired and necessary is Paul’s counsel to be careful about our associations. As we apply the former counsel, we must not forget the latter. If we do not keep both principles in mind, our habits can be affected. How do your habits compare with those of your neighbors or relatives as respects honesty or obeying Caesar’s law? For instance, they may feel that at tax time, underreporting income or business profits is justified, even necessary for survival. They might speak persuasively about their views over a casual cup of coffee or during a brief visit. How could that affect your thinking and honest habits? (Mark 12:17; Romans 12:2) “Do not be misled. Bad associations spoil useful habits.”

*** w91 1/15 p. 27 The Pure Language Unites a Great Crowd of Worshipers ***

The importance of watching our associations was highlighted in Tuesday’s talk “Are Your Friends Jehovah’s Friends?” Our friends should be Christians who have put on the Christlike personality and are zealous in the preaching work. Worldly acquaintances are not friends of God, and we cannot socialize with them without harm to ourselves. Even within the congregation, we must be selective if our associations are to be truly upbuilding.

00DAD

TNIB: We have been friends for 4yrs now but at first she didn't bring up religious meanings until she realized that we didn't share the same beliefs.

OK, that just doesn't make any sense at all!

How could you possibly be friends for 4 years and she not know you weren't a JW? That's just not possible.

First, as I said before and as Blondie confirmed with a few WT quotes, it'd be disobedient to WT "Theology" and practice for a JW to even associate with someone that isn't a JW let alone be friends. It would be odd for you to know each other for 4 days without the subject coming up let alone for 4 years.

Since you don't apparently know this, let me clue you in: JW's don't "share the same beliefs" with any other religion.

TNIB: When I do win a debate all she does is say "I'll research it" and never brings it up again.

Do you want to win debates or have a friend? Generally the two are mutually exclusive.

Something about your whole account just doesn't smell right.

Either your friend is being dishonest or you are.

The only thing, and I mean THE ONLY THING, that could possibly explain this is that your "friend" really does NOT want to be a JW and is leading a "double-life" 1 by befriending you. If that's the case then you could possibly show her the door out of the cult. What I mean by that is that by showing her that people that are not JW's are normal, good, kind and loving people you will be opening for her a door of understanding that has previouslyb been nailed shut.

She has been taught all her life that you can NOT have a wonderful, fulfilling life outside of the organization known as Jehovah's Witnesses. On the other hand you have the opportunity to prove to her the real truth. She can leave the WT and she will not die, go crazy, worship Satan or become a drug-addict that has to sell her body to make a living.

Reality, what a concept!

00DAD

-------------------

1 - "Double-life" is a JW expression which, when translated into normal English, means that a cult member is basically a normal person when they are NOT with fellow JW's, but when they with other JW's they pretend to be True-Believers.

Of course, JW's would say that it is the exact opposite of this, but they do that with a lot of words.

I Thing Being Friends With My Jehovah Witness Friend is Taking A Mental Toll On Me?

Share this