Welcome to the board!
Our situations are very similar. Please don't do like I did and bombard your wife with info about how the WT is wrong! It's useless.
As far as the issues you listed... You'll just have to do the research and decide for yourself! It's diddicult to learn how to read the bible objectively, without WT blinders on. Once you learn to do this, it's amazing to realize how JWs are unable to understand the scriptures! Sit at the meeting during the bible highlights... And the silly comments that come forth... It's crazy.
Your story is a good example of how the mind control can be tough to break. You almost did it years ago and it really bothered you, but it didn't quite take. If you haven't researched cult mind control and cognitive dissonance, please do.
I know what you mean about wanting the WT to be right.. The cost of leaving is so great.
feel free to PM me anytime