You hate your s????? for ruining a good man!! Unbelievable!
If you're for real then you have a heart of stone.
My Husband Said "Victims Of Pedophiles Come Forward Soon, Not Fifteen Or Thirty Years Later!" Right?
by AuntConnie 72 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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AuntConnie
whahappened your life must have been "peaches and creme" with your wife, right? You have all the answers so tell me what is your secret to your long marriage and happy family life? Share with me, so I can learn from a expert perfect families so I might use this with my dysfunctional crazy parents and siblings. That is very sick to think a topic thread about pedophiles and family hatred is satire and funny, nobody is laughing here. It's a highly charged topic and I might come off as crazy, I do not want to be on TV with Jerry Springer or Montel Williams. Why would my s. screw with our reality of being one of the least dysfuntional familes in the Kingdom Hall? Appearance and Image is more important than dealing with reality or the pain.
rebel8, I come from a very private family and we do not air our dirty laundry into the Kingdom Hall or the public's "court of opinion". Men and women have been sexually assualted since time began, it's only in the last fifty to sixty years "supposed victims" are allowed to wallow in their "pity parties". We are suppose to show forgiveness to people who sin against us, if this event really took place, why did she socialize with the pedophile for years before this bad report came forward? In my Kingdom Hall, there are "Friends For The Pedophile" and they make very valid arguments asking "why did she socialize with him if he is so evil?" or "He most not have hurt her as bad as she claims, if she still would go out in field service with the pedophile and his wife or babysit his kids?"
You ask a question, I would suppress it and burry it so far from my mind, nothing good would come from it. I am impressed by your trained eye and respect you.
"I suspect your real worry may be deeper than just being the relative of a victim. Are you a victim yourself and worried her openness may bring to light what happened to you?
Nothing good comes out of dragging a strong witness down"
The Facts: The pedophile confessed twice and was never charged with being a pedophile. He sent his victim a "apology letter", and admitted he did do this but the Society never removed him or punished him because of his continuity of serving as a elder and receiving parts at Circuit and District Assemblies. The Society must have their own Statue Of Limitations, where sins are no longer valid after decades?
Is it possible the Watchtower intentionally avoided labeling him a pedophile for legal reasons or he had something of value to haunt them with? If he was evil, the Watchtower would have disfellowshiped him or at the least, publically reproved him. He has never been officially charged with this, even though he has a a letter that follows him to every future congregation he will attend.
The pedophile continuted to serve in the highest capacity until the pedophile tried to disfellowship somebody the victim knew. The victim started to remember how the pedophile would say "if you ever tell anyone, I will kill you and your parents". Years after confessing to a compassionate body of elders, he received nothing but healing words by the loving elders. The elderbody decided it was best not to tell the victim he came forward because of her chronic depression and as the lead elder said "Nothing good will come out of this, the brother has confessed and we don't need a congregation circus. Let's tell her father "there was a modest problem but we took care of it." (they told her father My dad nothing) and see if he want's to pusue it. It was decided to let sleeping dogs lie and keep the elder in his position where he started to create his own "Pedophile Data Base" and hand out maps to publishers or pioneers warning them of the grave danger of pedophiles.
Most of the Witnesses are siding with the pedophile because her past actions do not display a loathing of this man? Alright, how come she did not report this to the elders when she was eight-years old? How about ten or fifteen years old? We can ask why she did not mention this during her twenties or early thirties? Think about this, if he really is or was, so wicked, why did she wait until the pedophile conscience's finally bugged him? She jumped on Prosac and has suffered from depression for decades, why did she bog down a good man who brought joy to our circuit?
Something we all need to think about because nobody is perfect in this world! Most Organizations are starting to come to grips with the phenomena of child molestation and how to better handle or create a "best practices" guide with Elders, Pastors, Priest and other members of the Church. Why does everyone jump on the bandwagon when a member of the Kingdom Hall is accused or prosecuted for child molestation? We won't have a perfect paradise until Jehovah brings about the Paradise Earth and it's not fair the Watchtower Officials or elders are charged with malfeanse or a conspiracy to remain silent or hide information from the police. The roll of being a minister and confidential talk or confessionary to confessor is going to be removed the supposedly abused, waiting decades just to bring down a good elder.
Do I need to explain why I am here, why can't I be here because?
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unstopableravens
auntie: you have not yet responded to any of my comments,anyway why are you here? are you pro wt? or do you wish to leave?
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mrsjones5
AC is here to play.
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unstopableravens
its wierd,she ,he ,it who or what ever auntie is speaks oppisite things
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jgnat
Why would my s. screw with our reality of being one of the least dysfuntional familes in the Kingdom Hall? - NC
A festering wound cannot heal without a lancing.
Appearance and Image is more important than dealing with reality or the pain. - NC
No.
Men and women have been sexually assualted since time began... - NC
...and slavery was the norm only a scant hundred years ago. This injustice of humanity is gratefully gone. It was only by exposing it as the horror as it was - a bloody civil war - persistent, eloquent, civil disobedience - and continued vigilance, are we getting anywhere near equality.
We are suppose to show forgiveness to people who sin against us - NC
I would suggest repudiation, remorse and restoration is required before forgiveness can be given.
... "Friends For The Pedophile"... - NC
May God protect their children since, obviously, the parents are not.You realize that pedophiles groom both parents and children for abuse, and can be quite accommodating and charming?
Just think, if he had simply not predated on this vulnerable girl, your sister would never have suffered from depresssion?
My father was sexually assaulted by a popular music conductor. My father did not speak of this and I only found out second-hand in my forties. Much of his brooding and introversion made sense once I found out.
Nothing good comes out of dragging a strong witness down - NC
This board is not enough. You need to open up, confidentially, to a safe professional therapist. You are not a strong witness. You are still that scared little girl. -
AuntConnie
jgnat: all that therapist want to do is to explore the same thing, talk about ugly things from the past. In secret I visited a self trained jw therapist, she was not licensed but the elders would send their wives to her. She only focused on sexual abuse and nothing more, I almost went into a nervous breakdown after each visit. Therapist are nothing more than overpaid "panic attacks" waiting to confront the patient. I mean, what is the purpose of sitting in a chair, paying $300 a hour to allow someone to bring back horrible memories and throw my body into "fight or flee mode"? Once you think your moving onto a different topic, they bring back down your childhold and force you to open that box. I hate them because they are too fascinated by gory or graphic details and won't change the topic no matter how uncomfortabe the subject is.
ty jgnat, nothing is easy in life but I can warn people of what is possible.
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jgnat
That wasn't a safe therapist. A good one lets you walk through the door at your pace. Some boxes just won't be opened. Believe me, I know about the closed box.
My therapist said a simple thing that gave me a new perspective on my neurotic mom. I've been able to grieve what I lost, stopped raging that she could not be what I needed, and reconciled to a simpler "relationship".
Lady Lee, a moderator and poster here, gave excellent advice on picking a good therapist. Her comments also set me free (about choosing to keep some boxes unexplored).
Do you really want to go to your grave hating everyone, including yourself?
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jgnat
By the way, an early subject, I would think, would be about setting boundaries between you and your husband. It is often hard to tell if you are speaking with your voice or your husband's. Either you are yanking our collective chains, or else you have somehow lost your self along the way.
