Welcome brainmelt!
Fading with children in tow
by brainmelt 40 Replies latest jw experiences
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happy@last
Welcome here, you're not alone in your thinking as you've discovered. Glad you realise you need to save your kids. All the best in your journey.
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speargrass55
Welcome to the folder. Let no one tell you how to live your life. All the best.
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jonno12225
Hi Brainmelt. I too find myself in a similar situation. I am in my early 30's, born in, baptised at 13 at hellerby assembly in North Yorkshire, England. The problems of suffering was one of the things that eventually led me to here. My first post decribes my doubts.
I too have children, 3 with the oldest being 9 and my twins being 6 now. I want them to grow and have a good understanding of the world they live in.
I finally stopped meeting attendence last month so the raw feelings are still with me even though I know ive done the right thing.
All my love and best wishes
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SkyGreen
Hi brain melt, I've sent u a pm - we have a login common my sister! To open your messages, click on the little envelope icon at top right of screen, u will probably get an error msg, just click again and u should get it
Love sky x
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Aussie Oz
Welcome
as the kids are quite young I wouldnt worry too much about them...it's amazing jusy how much WT stuff they don't take in if you let it be,
concentrate on the husband first. But don't assume because he is spiritually weak that he will fold. The JW spirituality status is all about how many hours door to door are done, nothing more. A wife going off the reservation can trigger questions in his mind that lead him to do MORE JW stuff not less in an attempt to bolster his weakness and bring you back in.
Learn well your enemy and read lots of how people handle things in similar situations.
oh and one more thing, Tell him nothing. Only ask him QUESTIONS to make him think....
all the best
Oz
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villagegirl
Think of the new prospects before you. Take some community college courses. Explore, read everything you can.
Learn some new skills. Help your children to think about a useful future
in which they can be doing some interesting things through getting an education in university.
Instead of treading water, stuck in limited expectations and fear , they can think of becoming possibly
an Engineer, and Architect, a Scientist, a Marine Biologist, a Doctor, an Attorney, a Regsitered Nurse, an Optician,
a Dentist, a Teacher, a Computer Programmer, an Animator of animated films,
a world of ope possibilities to actually DO something with their life, building ,
creating, helping their community and the possibly the world of people who need help in so many ways.
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Fernando
Welcome brainmelt!
Fernando
SEQ, Australia
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villagegirl
Think of what opportunities you are opening up for your children. Instead of treading water, stuck in limited and controlled choices and dumbed down opportunities, now they can actually be useful citizens and contributers in life. They can study with a purpose, become creative people. Some examples: an Engineer, a Medical Doctor, a Registered Nurse, an Attorney, a Teacher, a Marine Biologist, an Architect,a Film Maker, an Animator, a Journalist, a Scientist.
You will have given them a hopeful life, an expanding life , a kinder more inclusive life that includes balance and moderation even in their spiritual life. They will not be stuck in the "All or Nothing" thinking of a fear based cult.They will be able to enter into a compasionate relationship with other people that is impossible in a cult culture that creates vanity and false superiority.
Freedom is scary but it is worth it, to step out with the knowledge you are personally responsible for your own decisions and thinking, even on religious beliefs. You don't go from the "Truth" to darkeness. Darkness is the vain assumption your "obedience" to eight arrogant men, equals worship of God.
You now have to begin to think, really think , for the first time in your life. Those of us who have gone through this transition, may have begun be thinking we are now "lost" and so we will self destruct and deny God even exists or take out our anger in destructive ways to our own harm. This is not necessary at all. You can proceed with a clear head and in a positive way, relearning how to think, how to relate to other people, how to create community in your life.
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excitesinceredetermination
I love what eyesropen said, there is nothing like seeing true unbridled joy on your children's faces. To see their eyes beam when you surprise them with their first birthday party and friends from school. :) To realize that you can now give them everything you didn't have growing up. They can grow up feeling normal, playing sports and hangin out with friends in pajamas on Saturday mornings....simple things in life that they don't have to feel guilty for...they will treasure being freed from such tight control.
I have little ones too and in the same situation. If you want to message me to discuss anything that weighs on your mind, just click on my name and send message on the blue bar. Leaving may take a while, but it will pay off. Hang in there & welcome hun!