by magotan 125 Replies latest jw experiences
Hi,
I am so amazed by you. So brave. I have several close male gay friends (I am a girl) who used to be witnesses. They say it is so hard at first, but it gets so much easier once you start living true to yourself. I wish you peace and happiness. Find someone who makes you feel special and some new friends. It will get better.
tt
This is a double post, so I'll just give you another, HELL YA
tt
You have more courage than me Mogatan.
Well done.
Sometimes I think my parents have an inkling I'm gay & that I may be able to tell them, then they say something that makes me see they have no idea at all.
Hoab
They've certainly given you a hearty helping of drama and guilt for their parting shots.
In your new freedom, there will be ups and downs, but now you can get on with life.
Let us know how things are going, Mag. You mentioned last night that you were in your car until the roommate situation comes together. Pleanty of resources for you to draw from.
Keep us posted.
Thanks for the support. In a motel right now, roommate situation is fallig apart. Im a bit dire right now. I keep thinking of going back, but that does not seem possible.
Leave it to me to just about have a great post ready to submit: gone.
Drat!
Anyways, Megotan ... you have come to the right place. There's many supportive former JWs here who are not put off by your sexuality, but they will be concerned about how you are being treated.
I am saddened to read of your predicament. How terrible! I have been in that situation; not the same as yours, but leaving the WTBTS because of one's coming to terms with their sexuality and NOT wanting to live a lie. Oh I remember those terrible nights, praying and praying for this 'thing' to be taken away from me. Immersing myself in pioneer activities; extra assemblies; special talks; fellowship with other JWs ... but it all came to naught.
When I arrived at this site just a little over 10 years ago, I was met with kindness and came to know many fine people as a result. It was welcoming and despite the few hiccups one encounters, it's a good place to be. As you can see, there's several pages already extending their open arms and kindnesses. Some very nice people here ... and I recognize a few names too. I am so pleased.
Nearly 30 years ago, I had to come to terms with my sexuality and it drove me to despair. In those days, there was no internet and I had no way of finding out where former JWs were, let alone gay ones were. Fast forward the clocks and here we are: this forum and countless other support forums on-line.
I wish you well although I am sure you are quite upset and saddened to be confronted with such a predicament. I feel for ya fellah.
Hang tight and steady the course. What we lose with our biological family and former friends, we will gain with a new chosen family and friends who like you no matter what.
Simon who is the admin on here, was welcoming to me from the get go here, so I am confident you will be fine here. In fact, I know it.
Best wishes and I hope you can get through this emotional upheaval that you've been given.
Stay strong - reach out - we're all here for ya bud.
Cheers! I've been in your shoes Magotan.
This sounds a lot like my story when I pulled out in my late teens and left home. Just think of them as a drunk getting their bottle taken away. They are going to blame you, insult you, and despise you. They are losing control of you and it does not feel good to them.
Give it time, return your momma's phone calls when she does call (She will). Keep the convo light don't tell her you met the most awesome guy as long as she doesn't bash you with WT doctrine. Don't push too hard or call them too much, let everyone get comfortable with the new boundaries you are creating. Let them calm down and come to you a little. They will realize it's not the end of the world and your brave stand might actually cause them to doubt their own beliefs, but that is waaaaaaaaaay down the road.
By all means stay away from drugs and too much alcohol. You have a big hole in your heart and life. You are very vulenerable right now, but it's not all bad. You will attract some of the coolest and neatest friends of your life in this stage. Just don't fuck around with dope. That's where I went wrong. There is not enough drugs in the world to fill the hole and you will go down. Sorry for the lecture, but you're young, and ex-JW, and gay trust me, it will come up.
You set a boundary and let them decide how to react instead of trying to control the situaiton. There are people on this board that wouldn't have the courage to do that in a 100 years. Congrats, your a real man now. Hang in there and have fun. It's your life now!
-CF
