Girl scout cookies are demonized

Gojira_101

Okay so I think it might be the concussion making me go on this rant...not too sure.

The girl scouts started selling their cookies yesterday and for the first time in my life I will be ordering cookies.....I mean WTF is so wrong with ordering cookies from them? I love the thin mint's and guess what? YOU CAN ONLY BUY THEM FROM GIRL SCOUTS!!!!!!

So what? is Jehovah going to kill me at Armageddon because I ate a box of girl scout cookies? Really how stupid is that?

I asked my mom what the big deal is about getting girl scout cookies and she can't even tell me.

I have a few theories.

1. Since the girl scouts go door to door selling their cookies...well maybe that makes WTBT$ jealous because people will actually give the girls money for their product and Householders are actually happy to see the girl scouts.

2. The girl scouts get more money from people than WTBT$.

3. Girl scouts will get trips and benefits if they sell more, and dubs get nothing.

3. The chocolate is produced by Satan to taste good.

4. People would rather eat something good in their own home sitting on the couch in their underwear playing video games, rather than sit in a stuffy, boring KH thinking about food and wondering when the hell the meeting is over.

5. You don't have to wait 100 years for the cookies to be deliviered, the girl scout promise "no false prophets here! You WILL get your cookies" And you get instant gratification.

6. If you don't agree with the idea that thin mints are the best, you won't be df'ed for disagreeing.

7. If you eat the vanilla creams you won't be shunned.

8. You don't have the boys in Brooklyn telling you what kind or how many, or where you can eat the cookies....You can eat the whole freaking box if you want and nobody cares.

9. If you have girl scout cookies in your cupboard, that's inviting the demons into your house and you will be harassed by demons, J-dubs and elders...they want your cookies to. See even the demons like cookies.

10. With your order over $50 you get a free Sparlock toy.

11. The "world" serves cookies at B-day parties, so clearly they are BAD!

12. And I'm sure a "transfusion" of chocolate can't be good either!

So yea, I can see the danger and why I'm going to die at the Big "A" because I ate a freaking cookie!

If WTBT$ is losing members because of the flip flopping new light, well WTBT$ needs to start selling cookies, maybe that would be enough of an incentive for them to keep their members?

So really what is the big deal with girl scout cookies?

Sorry for the rant!

G

villagegirl

Have you thought of being a a stand-up comedian ?

You are hilarious - I love this - it made my day -thanks for this

Laughed so hard, I almost gave myself a concusion.

LostGeneration

I've never heard a JW say that their cookies are bad. But they don't let them join the scouts, so I guess by extension they are bad.

(I even ordered/bought them while active and my JW wife never said a thing)

NeonMadman

Actually, the position is that boy and girl scouts are paramilitary organizations, and that supporting them would be a violation of neutrality. You need to go back to the Golden Age of May 22, 1935 to read the details, but there has never been a revision of the teaching. As you note, most JWs follow the rule but have no idea why.

Matsimus

In Norway we don't have girl scouts selling cookies. So I'm not familiar with it or to what degree these little girls fills them with satanic symbols. Obviously eating them would be part of a satanic ritual. Am I wrong about this, or is JW philosophy still deep in my mind?

Would be awesome if someone brought them to a KH and started sharing them ^^

Matsimus

jamiebowers

I think Girl Scout cookies are demonized....well, at least the Samoas, LOL! They actually call to me from my kitchen cupboards.

LostGeneration

I've actually been a bit annoyed by them lately, seems they are offering them to me everywhere.

But if they are Satanic, I guess I'll have to go ahead and buy a few boxes...

Gojira_101

Actually, the position is that boy and girl scouts are paramilitary organizations,

Holy Crap!!!!! That means the 10 year old girl is a future Black Ops or Navy Seal.....So selling the cookies is what special ops training?

Oh My God!!! I can so totally see it now. Their base camp is their table they set up with the cookies stacked up. I'm totally scared now to approach their table...is it booby trapped? Is there trip wires? Landmines? God if I don't say the right pass phrase the girl is jump out and hold a knife to my throat!

I heard of kiddie soldiers, and I knew Al-Qualda started them young...but damn!!!!! I'm scared to get my cookies now

Matsimus: If you brought in a box of girl scout cookies and a Sparlock toy to the KH, the elders would be performing an exorcism right there on the spot!

VillageGirl: I'm normally not funny at all! I have no idea where this is coming from

Well I think I would feel safer with the 10yr old girl receiving special ops training then my JW nephew, that kid is going to be a future serial killer I swear...I'm serious you should see his eyes!!!!

Sulla

I was at a small town in north Georgia last week, walking around. Sounded like a bunch of kids doing a protest outside a store -- weird, right? Anyway, turns out they were chanting, "Girl scout cookies FOR SALE!"

Theocratic Sedition

Girl Scout Cookies just might be demonized. The chocolate thin mints are damn near addictive. Matter fact, think I'm gonna go out tonight and get some. Those girls set up shop at a grocery store near me. They're as bad as dope dealers and I'm going to get my fix.

Girl scout cookies are demonized

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