How to spot a Sociopath

by larc 49 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Lady Lee

  I suspect that we all have the ability to overcome our experiences. How great that ability is probably is genetically based. But there needs to be a strong will and at some point in life opportunity to reinvent the self.

  In both my patrents I know that childhood expereinces greatly colored the adults they became. Some of that I can feel sorry for. But at the same time many children of abuse make choices about living differently than we were raised. I hated the life my parents gave me. I tried my best not to hand too much of that down to my children and for the most part I succeeded. I changed what I knew about - what was clearly evident - and as I learned more I changed more. Certainly leaving the Borg helped me make the vast changes that I needed to make for myself and my children.

  I think too that it takes a great deal of self-awareness and the willingness to be honest - really honest - with ourselves. Neither of my parents lived honestly. Probably where I learned to detest lying and liars.

  But we can only be as honest with ourselves as we are capable of being at any point in our lives. My hope is that I never regress to that which I was taught and that I continue to move forward in living honestly - a far cry from the sociopath or narcissist I grew up with.

  The crucial point for me was in being able to actually see and accept their mental illnesses. The family problems were not about me. Their beliefs about me were theirs and had nothing to do with who I was as a person. Both were so caught up in their own delusions and worlds that they never even saw me.

  Information is power - and freedom.

  Interesting thought about appying the criteria to an organization.

  Rejoice in the healing and not in the pain.
  Rejoice in the challenge overcome and not in the past hurts.
  Rejoice in the present - full of love and joy.
  Rejoice in the future for it is filled with new horizons yet to be explored. - Lee Marsh 2002
• 

  one

  when you are nice to people the sociox thinks you are stupid and can manipulate you.

  As soon as you notice some manipulation let him/her know that you have your eyes open. Avoid them if you can. It may take shunning wt style, some are very hard to get rid of, you know.

  You wont belevie my stories. I am a man but even have been victim of sexual assualt (woman) and some more... they (sociox) really act crazy.
• 

  waiting

  Howdy Lee & One,

  Glad you joined this thread - Larc has another one going on about Social Influences I & II - just as interesting.

  Lee

  Criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder

  My first husband - at his self-perceived finest. Always was.....and he'll die thinking that every woman is wanting him - even in his coffin. The pig. Well, I'll leave this part of the conversation.....as I tend to cuss when I discuss the bastard. At least, he produced fine, intelligent, beautiful children. Too bad he's chosen to have no contact with them for over 20 years.

  My mother? She was dead also before I entered therapy. Actually, I had no out of the ordinary memories of childhood (and quite a few years & people missing too) until both parents were dead.

  The consensus of therapists about her was that she was most likely a strong borderline personality, along with being quite narcissistic. She was the center of her universe, until a new friend would come along, then she'd take on that person's opinions, and then she was the center of her new, different, universe.

  Both were so caught up in their own delusions and worlds that they never even saw me.

  A true statement for children like us.

  waiting
• 

  one

  i am dragging several people and goverment agencies to court. Now they know i am stupid. I wish i could the same to the wt, who knows.

  I filed an 11 page sue for damages, on my own. Lawyers would like to take the case now.

  Just keep detailed records and witness, then act on time.
• 

  plmkrzy

  Hi Lady Lee

  Everything you wrote and many things’ I studied in my psychology
  Classes are so familure I don't think I will ever reach a point where I'm not affected by it when I do read about these disorders or hear about them from other people. It never stops amazing me how wide spread it is.

  I can still remember clearly when the idea of someone having more then one personality was considered absurd. We've come a long way in the last less then a century.

  I never understood or even experienced the feeling of being empowered until I was able to change the way I respond to abusive people, no matter who they are, and accept them for who they are and simply walk away. And Not Look Back. (meaning not feeling guilty for turning my back). I had a real problem with preventing myself from becoming a "co-dependant" If you live long enough as a co-dependent you will eventually become the person you are dependent on. Or afraid of.

  It's good to hear from others who have come out of abusive situations and taken a positive direction.

  (((((((Waiting and children)))))))))) (((((((((Ladylee))))))))

  
  

  No matter how thin you slice it there are always two sides
• 

  bitter mango

  grave,
  

  I am a sociopath.

  100% AGREED!

  even after everything
  you're the queen and i'm the king
  nothing else means anything
• 

  larc

  grave dancer,

  I did not respond to your comment because this is not a laughing matter. If you are, indeed, a sociopath, then I want nothing to do with you.
• 

  Lady Lee

  (((plm))) to you too. Life after living with one of these abusers is a challenge but the hard work of recovery is sooo worth it. I think the healing work is the hardest I have ever done but most definitely the most rewarding. it has brought freedom for me and also to my children and now grand-daughter. We are all worth it

  Rejoice in the healing and not in the pain.
  Rejoice in the challenge overcome and not in the past hurts.
  Rejoice in the present - full of love and joy.
  Rejoice in the future for it is filled with new horizons yet to be explored. - Lee Marsh 2002
• 

  dungbeetle

  The Watchtower doctrines do seem to appeal to the narcisstic type of personality. When one is narcisstic (the world revolves around me, God is my personal friend, etc etc)then that same person is at risk for other mental aberations as well.

  Not all narcisstic people become child molesters,rapists or murderers, but all child molesters rapists and murderers are narcisstic. You have to be narcistic, to get motivated to engage in bevior like that. Those seeds have to be there first.

  I think the greatest risk is when these people, with mental and psychological handicaps, find their way into an organization which will only make their diseases worse. Then combine that with an organization which says to treat these diseases/conditions with field service (more victims, that's what's needed, yes) prayer and meetings.

  And thus occur the Freemans, Bryants, Longos etc.

  There's got to be something to the fact that some of the worst crimes committed by JW's are committed by 2nd and 3rd generation JW's. It's really scary.

  And really useful in court.
• 

  gravedancer

  Larc,

  That's not nice.