by jemba 34 Replies latest jw friends
I've experienced the lack of love and feeling, also.
Before we paint too broad of a brushstroke. I've also experienced love and caring. There have been times where the "friends" have taken me into their homes and other times cooked for my family and sent flowers during hard times.
The org does have caring people, too. The environment it promotes tries to squeeze it out of those individuals.
jemba:
This is what happens when you check your brain at the door and entrust thinking decisions to somebody else. And, yes, they are notorious for not wanting to help people outside their group. Hell, they don't even help people inside their group if the person is not in the right clique!
While I don't think all JWs lack love and feelings, they are afraid to openly show it to certain people and under certain circumstances. They are afraid how they will be judged by others in the religion. They have become a group of pharisees looking over their shoulder.
A lot of them are "social climbers" inside the organization and they do not want to be perceived as doing or thinking something or associating with somebody that will cause them to be criticized by those who they aspire to be accepted by (sounds pathetic and it truly is).
In a nutshell, it is a fear-based worthless joke of a religion.
Red Pillar ... good comment.
There are good and bad people ... unfortunately the good are being taken down now with the bad.
The where else will we go. .... Spiritually - where else will we go? To associate with other's with the (mostly) same beliefs. The TRUTH. you know. The model Jesus taught of what it is supposed to be. DOES IT EXIST anywhere?
His teachings were very clear on what sort of people we should be, our conduct and heart, etc. Gathering together, etc.
I have been finding myself comparing the signs of the last days, what people would be like etc - to the actual organisation. Based on the things I have been learning. Other peoples experiences etc. the stories that are coming out.
Is it, as an organisation, any different really to the christendom that they condemn. Only that they 'teach' bible truth and use Jehovah's name.
It can all be pretty headwrecking and confusing when you start thinking about it all.
It's so painful for people to realise and have these thoughts. And then have to try to deal with them, especially if they believe.
So many people in so much pain with their famiilies, wrecked lives, everything. All done in the name of god cos they have THE TRUTH, they are God's only true organisation. They are the only ones preaching the message world wide to every nation etc etc ... just llike it says in the Bible.
no wonder people are struggling anad don't know what to believe anymore.
I'm totally in the confused state as well right now. It's a process I know . but it is so scary.
not because there is no where to go in the world, it's not so bad, there are good people, many of them, and there are bad.
But spiritually.
Most all of our former "friends" avoid us, and we are just "inactive".
Doc
Thanks *lost*. I try to imagine a witness who is curious and stumbles upon this board. A thread like this might turn them off, if it's filled with too many assumptions regarding their individual behaviour. No doubt about it, the org is evil and creates a toxic environment filled with malice. However, JW's are still individuals and will react in their own ways to that influence. There are exceptions to the norm....
I've been mentally awake (still in) for a few years now. It is scary and confusing, especially at the start. It gets better - hang in there.
Caring people are who they are, despite any given organization. The WTBTS certainly does not ecourage real love, especially to " worldly " people. I had an Elder tell me that skipping service to help a neighbor with an emergency was not a spiritual decision. Ignoring your neighbor until service was done was acceptable. The circumstances did not matter. These are the Shepherds of the flock saying these things. Remember it is a top-down organization. So even though we don't want to paint every JW with a broad brush, lack of natural affection is a very real problem, and comes from the top. Sorry newly awakening ones, that's the truth.
They believe that real love is offering a Watchtower. If the householder refuses, " Oh well..I guess the don't want God's love. Too bad for them."
"Way back, when I was married to an elder, I kept a sister's baby so she could take her older son to the dentist. I was told by my "loving" husband that the only legitimate reason to babysit would be to allow her to go out in service. I was also criticized for babysitting a Bitle student's child so she could take the other child to the ER.
I'm so glad to be able to make my own judgments and do what is right because it's right.
There are good and bad people ... unfortunately the good are being taken down now with the bad.
"Beware the leaven of the Pharisees and the Sadducees." Sadly the Witness organization is run by the modern-day Pharisees, and their leaven corrupts the good-hearted ones in the congregations. They may still show love, but they're being limited in how much love they can feel and express.
red pillar ....
totally agree. and I totally understand what your talking about. I still believe. My story is in the private section. I'm on the fringes, been in and out since late 80's.
Was never totally in in a big way indoctrinated like everyone else but did get dunked, as they say, lol.
Breaking down the barrier is not abbout telling them, but showing them, by actions, as they say faith without works etc.
the thing is, i believe, mentally its not the org, or the men, or however many things you can say and prove about it and whats wrong with it, its the mental tie to God. Spiritually, that's the FREAK OUT moment. argh .... i can't go against God etc. i think, what you say ?
i'm so relieved I have found somewhere where these things can be discussed.
I KNOW myself you can't talk about it 'in' the truth. BARRIERS. FEAR. etc.
I see now how hard it is for all out there and the situations they are tangled up in with family, thoughts, etc.
just found out what ORWELLIAN means. lol
lost
Orwellian is the right word!
And definitely the mental tie to God is a big part of it. You go from thinking that you know God and that he personally backs your faith to nothing. You start from scratch.
I believe in God too. I read the book The Shack. It's a fictional account. (A lot if bible-thumpers criticize it) It was soothing-such a different picture of God than what I was given before. Made me realize that other perspectives will help you still believe and it will be a healing type of faith.
