JWs Lack of Love and Feelings

by jemba 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • Julia Orwell
    Julia Orwell

    OMG were you in the floods? Bundaberg or thereabouts? Don't tell me if you don't want to 'out' yourself. I live on the Gold Coast by the way.

    You make a really good point. Among 'worldly' organisations and workplaces, people take up special collections to help the flood victims. Yet, there's never a collection taken in the KH for the Qld flood victims, like the Macedonians who took up a collection for the famine victims in Jerusalem. If such a collection were taken, I know people would contribute, but the JW leadership does not allow any grassroots action and has instilled a culture of hierarchy in which someone like me wouldn't even think of initiating a collection. The only time I've heard of collections being taken is for elders or pioneers in the local congregation who've been sick and needed operations or expensive treatments.

    Whereas the 'world' advertises the need to help the needy and raises funds publically, the JWs only contribute if some announcement from the Branch is read at the Service meeting. Even when the cyclone hit FNQld when I lived up there, and brothers poured in from all over the NQld region, it always went throught the CO and not as a spontaneous outpouring. Mind you, this CO we had in FNQld was a great guy who really did work hard and cared. Of course he dropped dead from a heart attack before his time, because the ones who care always wear out from the hectic pace.

    True, spontaneous love has been stripped away from JWs, not because the people don't care, but because love has become institutionalised and now has to go through the 'proper channels'. Human feeling can only now be expressed through the 'proper channels'. Our humanity has been denied us, and that's what I'm discovering.

    And when there is love shown to disaster victims, the WTS makes it into a propaganda video to show the suckers how 'loving' the org is, with all these cheesy advertising-type people saying slogans like, "Thanks to being in Jehovah's organisation..." like a commercial for Viagra saying "Thanks to Viagra, my marriage is saved!"

    What about the left hand not knowing what the right hand is doing?

    PS I'm a BIIIIIIIIIG fan of Orwell. Unlike most people who are familiar with George Orwell, I've read more than just Animal Farm and 1984! Not to make anyone feel bad for not reading his other titles, but I wear my Orwell-literacy as a badge of pride.

  • sd-7
    sd-7
    You can get shunned if you don't shun, how sick is that.

    Excellent line there. Deserves repeating.

    I can think of one act of kindness that stands out from an older JW, who became my friend, who I felt like...he was a grandfather I never had. He died some years ago, but I'll always remember that day I was sick, and he visited the house, and just left me a big bottle of juice. I didn't ask him to or anything, he just did it out of the kindness of his heart. I'll never forget that, because it was so rare, you know? So JWs do have the capacity for it, but it comes from within themselves more than it comes from the leadership. The GB is concerned with self-preservation above all else.

    On the other hand, I can think of 3 years ago, as a contrast of sorts. There was a major blizzard, and I hadn't yet acquired a shovel at that time, since I'd just barely moved out of my parents' house months before. My car was stuck in the space, and I was trying to dig my way out with a scraper of all things. Out of nowhere, one total stranger lets me borrow his shovel, and another totally unrelated stranger actually digs out most of the snow for me!

    Guess what my destination was once I got in the car? My judicial committee! 5 minutes down the road, three elders charging up their shun guns, if you will...gotta love it. So the world I'm preparing to be cast out into for the first time helps me dig out of my parking space so I can go get cast out into it...

    It's no small sense of irony that I'm confronted with in the face of that. My wife having been DF'd years before, and me being ordered to shun her by the elders back then...and now... It was just unreal the way they spoke about her while she was out, like she would never be worth loving even if she repented. These same people who said this to me behind closed doors are now no doubt smiling in her face, giving her hugs, and shunning me.

    Yeah. It's weird.

    --sd-7

  • Julia Orwell
    Julia Orwell

    You poor thing SD 7! They said stuff about her, even in your hearing? This is one of the things I worry about: that if I get dfd, they'll tell my husband to shun me except for 'necessary' family matters, and then what people will say about me...I couldn't care what they said about me if he weren't still in. And I hate it how they always assume a dfd person fornicated, or in a married person's case, cheated. I couldn't bear the thought of people spreading rumours that I cheated on my husband. That's why I won't even meet with a guy friend for coffee after work!!! Judgementalism is NOT love!

  • ÁrbolesdeArabia
    ÁrbolesdeArabia

    This is one of those topics I have been posting since my arrival at JWN. I feel like Meetings were similiar to "Home Room" back in Middle School (6-8th grade lasting twenty minutes before you move onto the rest of your classes.

    1. Flag Salaute Sing Kingdom Melodies

    2. Role Call Count Meeting Participants

    3. Current Events from the Newspaper Watchtower and Awake Comments

    4. Teacher calls to check on missing students. Nobody from the Kingdom Hall checks on missing publishers until another group in Field Service calls and leaves a tract for the Memorial on their door step.

    The claim of a "loving brotherhood" is insulting to those of us who know the religion is about appearances and performance. I find the problem is everyone is so consumed by life and making end's meet, the animal instinct take's over. The Witnesses who call to check up on you, are often trying to find a way to tell you about their latest MLM (work at home ponzi b), how often were you surprised to find "friends" not willing to speak to you, only to call you, leave a envelope for a Sales Party to promote and make money off of you? I was sick of all those MLMs, another way of begging for money, busineses like "Pampered Chef", "Avon", "Amway", "Herbalife", "Life Insurance", ect...

    I had some bitch call my house asking to check up on the family, "Did you know I can come to your house and show you my new line of cosmetics, I also learned to do "massages" for $150 a hour if you are interested in!". Look! These are the loving family members you exchanged your old ones for, their just as messed up as we are, some a little less and some a little more screwed up than us.

  • pearlsister
    pearlsister

    It's so sad to hear all the unloving stories here .

    Ya, I also think that visiting or calling someone in the hall doesn't count in your field service report, so, we don't have to do it...too sad..

    Years ago, I told to a group of JW how " nervouse -stressed I was because my father just got a organ tranplant 2 days ago " and nobody said

    nothing. It was like I said " the sky is blue "- like I talked to a wall... .

    I could not believe it !!!

  • piztjw
    piztjw

    Some years ago when I was still trying I had the "great privilege" of being food service coordinator for a RBC project. What started out to be a one meal per day arrangement turned into three squares per day, on my dime. The only help I could scare up was two crippled sisters.

    When I mentioned perhaps at one of the meals they could be served first, instead of kissing the RBC big wheels asses the answer from the jack-ass in charge was, "NO! We don't want to set precedent!" So much for love and fellow feelings.

    The ONLY way you can get any "love" from these people is if you are a reg'lar pious sneer, a golf buddy of the coordinator, or making big contributions. I went back to a meeting after being out of town for nearly three months and only one person actually asked, "Have you been gone? I didn't see you last week."

  • kassad84
    kassad84

    please don't generalize, its not that simple

  • nugget
    nugget

    I think the organisation discourages it's members form offering physical assistance this conditioning means that it often doesn't occur to them to help. They are told that the society helps members, that they are first to the disaster area and that by contributing to the worldwide work they have done enough. All the literature says that preaching is the best help a witness can give.

    Some witnesses will go the extra mile and offer help and others are completely unmoved by the plight of others.

  • jemba
    jemba

    Thankyou for your comments everyone.

    Yes Julia we are in the Bundy area. Because we have faded we dont really want too much info out there as most of our families are still 'in'.

    I love Picklers post on page one its so true the difference between how worldly people treat others and the way JWs just turn off and dont care.

    If they truly wanted us to come back wouldnt this have been the perfect opportunity to show love and kindness?

  • Finkelstein
    Finkelstein

    JWS are mostly uncharitable and apathetic to where they live because those people are dirty evil worldly people who are destine to die soon after all.

    When catastrophic tragedy occurs they think this god at work and it was prophesied.

    They will help their own JW members though if its deemed necessary.

    The thing about being a JWS is that you simple have less concern toward anyone who isn't a JWS, even in a localized tragedy of sorts.

    To some this even reconfirms to whats been indoctrinated into them about the end coming soon.

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