Don't be so hostile, Roberta.
OP moved away and is basically inactive. Do you really think every JW is going to be anxious to go out of their way to get their kids shunned?
Why does my family still interact with me?
by stillstuckcruz 27 Replies latest jw friends
-
-
Roberta804
Sorry did not mean to sound hostile. It is just why would anyone who is not having any difficulties come here? Seems he is doing fine with family and the JW and is free to come and go as he pleases and even announce he is gay. Doesn't make sense.
-
Chaserious
I don't think this forum is limited to those who are having serious difficulties. If things are going well with his family and he wants information that he thinks can help him keep it that way, I don't see the problem.
I have a relative on my wife's side of the family who was baptized, pioneering, etc, then decided he didn't want to be a JW anymore, and moved away and moved in with a wordly girlfriend. The parents went out of their way to not tell the elders about his situation and where he was currently living, phone number, and so on because they didn't want him DF'd. After the smoke cleared in a few years they started associating with him again. He has never been Df'd and has been openly doing lots of things you could be DF'd for and it has been 20+ years. He has attended JW weddings and is basically treated like an unbelieving family member, so it does happen.
-
stillstuckcruz
@Roberta- Not everyone on this site is going through some sort of travesty. Keep in mind that this is my first post in 4 or 5 months.I come to visit now and again to see what's going on in JWland but today I decided to post this part of my story simply because I was wondering about others thoughts on my topic...
-
00DAD
Count your blessings! You are one of the lucky ones. Maybe your parents are planning an exit themselves. It's happened before that the children leave first.
-
jgnat
What 00DAD said. Enjoy it. Enjoy your new life.
-
DesirousOfChange
Since you work at Disney, you must be in FLA or CA. The majority of CA are obviously some of the most liberal thinking about gay relationships; and Disney has such a profound influence in the FLA area and such a high percentage of gay employees (so I understand) and thus gays in the community, that perhaps your parents and their peers in that part of the country are not so biased about that lifestyle (as long as you keep it on the downlow).
(We see conservative republican leaders become much more understanding and liberal thinking about the subject after one of their children "comes out" as gay. Think: Dick Cheney, John McCain, recently Sen. Rob Portman)
It may very well be that you'll stay under the radar until you're involved in something obviously "wrong" and thus possibly make yourself subject to a Judicial Committee and DFing. So, tread cautiously if you want to avoid that. Rejoice that you are one of the minority who has managed to keep you family relationships intact!
Doc
-
ambersun
Hi stillstuckcruz. I am so glad to hear your family have not shunned you and sincerely hope it stays that way.
Roberta, I can understand why you might feel that way after reading some of the heartbreaking stories here on JWN. The things some members have had to endure are often unbelievably awful while others in comparison appear to have hardly suffered at all, but we are all different.
Please try to understand that there are many, many reasons to be here. We have all suffered in different ways and I am sure stillstuckcruz is no exception. I am lucky not to have been shunned by my family, but I struggled for nearly 20 years to come to terms with deep seated anger and resentment towards the organisation who robbed me of a proper education and a career (amongst other things). I found this site by chance and it has helped me so much.
Just to be able to interact with other ex JWs who understand what it is like to be raised in the stiffling confines of the WTS but have managed to escape its clutches is very reassuring and I have learned so much from the wealth of knowledge many of the JWN members have been kind enough to share with us all.
-
Gayle
I suspect plenty draw the line if there was an "official" disfellowshipping or not regarding their family member. The "moving" away ploy keeps many off the radar of gossip or meddling. The one who moved away may help the active JW family who can then just shrug and 'skirt' out of questions and being put on the spot about their actioning. Some figure out how to keep their family business 'private.'
-
mrsjones5
Doesn't pay to wait for the other shoe to drop. Don't stress or worry about it. If the shunning happens don't be shock just expect that it one day may happen and you really have no control other than how you respond to it.