shunning and jw funerals (page 2)

LongHairGal

maninblack:

JW funerals are nothing more than infomercials for the religion and I find them to be cold and unfeeling as opposed to other religions.

I would not go to a JW funeral unless I had some connection with the family and especially if there are other non-JW family there. I would sit with them and ignore the JWs. I have no need of their attention.

As others may have said, you might prefer to send a card. This way your sentiments are seen. You also might be pleasantly surprised and get a small acknowledgment card back from the family. It has happened to me.

I can appreciate your observation about them trying to pretend you don't exist. The fact that they do this means that they are perfectly aware that you are there! I have seen this behavior and laugh to myself because these people weren't my friends 30 years ago. They are a joke, really.

whathappened

When my Jw mother died last summer, my sister and I who are both faders were almost completely ignored. We are her only children, and we were treated like outsiders. People actually acted shocked and offended that we even spoke to them. What hypocrites!

LisaRose

I have two siblings in the religion. I am not sure I will go to their funeral, as they wont talk to me now, so why would I? I have allready lost them, so why pretend I just lost them? I told my husband not to invite them to my funeral either. He was shocked (he was never a JW). I understand that they only shun me because they are under cult mind control (as I was at one time), but I think it is phoney to shun me while I am alive, then want to mourn my passing. No hard feelings, but what is the point?

144001

That's sad, Lisa.

I was born-in to a hardcore JW family, but never bought into it, and never considered baptism. I hated every minute of my time there. Yet, I have gone to several JW funerals for family friends, and I have never been shunned or mistreated in any way.

The funerals, if you can call them that, really suck. They spend so little time talking about the life of the deceased, and so much time on pushing their beliefs on those in attendance. I think it's horrible that they shun at funerals. Although it hasn't happened to me, I've seen it happen at JW funerals, to others, including one family that shunned their son, on the occasion of his father's funeral, because he is gay. He was shunned by all in attendance, except me. I felt their disapproval as I spoke to their son and tried to comfort him, and they didn't have the courage to look me in the eye when I glared at them in disgust.

nowwhat?

there was this sister who was disfellowshipped at the time, her child was involved in a tragic accident. everbody hugged her and coonsoled her even though she was df'ed at the time.

DeWandelaar

I think it depends on the country and the region you are living in... the Df-ed people I saw when I was still active where never ever shunned... I talked with them and greeted them... everyone did... after that though it became "normal" to shun someone... which makes it hypocrit doesn't it :D

shunning and jw funerals