by nicolaou 30 Replies latest jw experiences
No one - repeat, no one - likes to be told they've been fooled. The language in your proposed letter is too strong and frankly, if I were your cousin, your letter would provoke me to stick up for the Witnesses. Besides, this letter seems to be primarily about your needs, no one else's.
Something's eating you - and it sounds as if you're out to show "they" are wrong and "you" are right. Very off-putting, I'm afraid.
I'm going to have to agree with Steve.
It does seem emotionally charged.
I have similar relaatives. They take it as a mark of prestige that their father and grandfather, who was a cantor in a Russian Orthodox congregation converted to JWs after the loss of his wife after 13 children. Five of the children died in steerage. They went to a respectable Presbyterian church with Sunday school, had birthday and other holiday celebrations. My life was very different. I thought they would want us to be free. When Ray Franz' first book was published, we mailed a copy to the relatives. They were insulted. I had to be the scapegoat and stay a Witness. Later, when I became Anglican, they mocked me. They live near coal mining towns. I do not.
Also, I was in a local Episcopal church study a few years ago. The statement that I appreciated sharing thoughts with educated people with almost no controlling behavior b/c of my JW background and that I wondered if they could ever appreciate it to the full extent that I did elicited a rebuke from the group leader. He remarked how he knew a fine JW individual in college. College! I could not restrain myself. He could base his opinion on one person but my informed opinion had to do with the central HQ crowd, not individual Witnesses. My family was in from the start and collateral relatives remain in the org. After summing up the major differences between Witnesses and Christianity, I launched into high control info.
He did not back down. It was inappropriate to take a vote of all those present. I do believe most agreed with my explanations. Experience with your captors should count. Reading endless WT articles and apostate lit should matter.
In my opinion, no you shouldn't.
They obviously have different views of the religion, if they held favourable views they would be JW's. I don't understand what you want to achieve? Sounds to me like your non-jw relatives just want a normal family relationship with their JW family, to them they probably love them whether or not they are JW's and the religion they belong to is largely irrelevant.
I think if you send this letter it will just reinforce what they already believe. It's too emotional, too attacking and there is no reasoning in what you say. Also the points you bring out from the scriptures are meaningless if you make the point that you don't believe the bible.
You want a reaction from them... well I hope for your sake it isn't an unpleasant one.
You're all right of course, I'm thoroughly pi$$ed off. Oh, no amount of guilt tripping or cult-speak from my JW family would ever surprise me but I really didn't expect it to this hardcore extent from my never JW relatives.
Ach! Ignore me, not in the best of moods...
I put up with constant not so subtle Witnessing from my aunt and uncle. The fact was that they could not talk about anything else b/c they knew nothing else. My aunt would call her wordly sister, once a JW, to make the simplest phone calls. Sometimes we cried for their isolation. I respected them, altho I had zero respect for their faith. My aunt and uncle were remarkable people, despite the Witnesses. They would have been stand outs in any group. So many times I just wanted to screech! It is too late now.
When I was young, I so much wanted to tell my aunt about all that I learned from simply reading the text of the Bible in the order in which it was written. She might trust me b/c she knew me. I would never lie. I realized, though, that the tension between the truth and her Witness beliefs would cause a serious mental breakdown. I am not exaggerating. Everyone faces their own journey.
Nicolaou, I know I said some very critical things about your letter, but I nonetheless do admire your courage in putting your heart on your sleeve and sharing some pretty painful stuff with us. Sometimes the pain is such that the best thing we can do is vent it in a safe setting where the consequences won't be so dire. Best.
Stop criticizing and keep your thoughts about JWs to yourself. ... Otherwise, you will only succeed in making yourself appear foolish. I speak from personal experience.
"I've learned that people only pay attention to what they discover for themselves." (Last line spoken by Anthony Perkins in the film Pretty Poison.)
"I've learned that people only pay attention to what they discover for themselves." (Last line spoken by Anthony Perkins in the film Pretty Poison.)
Rufus, one of my all-time favorite bleak films from the late 1960s. Tuesday Weld was stunning as the antisocial daughter.
