Then there's this one.... Someone threw a jw book out of a moving train & hit someone on the head & then they became a jw...
Jws and urban myths!
by Julia Orwell 53 Replies latest jw friends
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Oubliette
Here's the biggest JW Myth: JWs have "The Truth!"
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exwhyzee
The story about the smurff storming out of the Kingdom Hall on his own always made me wonder how he was able to get the door open by himself. Maybe the attendant turned the knob or pushed the bar for his since he was only a few inches tall.
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kurtbethel
There's a little problem with these urban legends, especially about intervention to protect people.
It contradicts what the Bible Teach book says in chapter 11.
15 Why, though, has Jehovah allowed suffering to go on for so long? And why does he not prevent bad things from happening? Well, consider two things that the teacher in our illustration would not do. First, he would not stop the rebel student from presenting his case. Second, the teacher would not help the rebel to make his case. Similarly, consider two things that Jehovah has determined not to do. First, he has not stopped Satan and those who side with him from trying to prove that they are right. Allowing time to pass has thus been necessary. In the thousands of years of human history, mankind has been able to try every form of self-rule, or human government. Mankind has made some advances in science and other fields, but injustice, poverty, crime, and war have grown ever worse. Human rule has now been shown to be a failure.
16 Second, Jehovah has not helped Satan to rule this world. If God were to prevent horrible crimes, for instance, would he not, in effect, be supporting the case of the rebels? Would God not be making people think that perhaps humans can govern themselves without disastrous results? If Jehovah were to act in that way, he would become party to a lie. However, “it is impossible for God to lie.”—Hebrews 6:18.
When this obvious contradiction is pointed out to a JW by a study, hilarious results ensue.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlbzhGBw8Bk&list=UURkHh_YsjzITXkQv0Z4918Q&index=3
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problemaddict
I just put two on the smurf thread. First there was supposedly blood in Nestle Quick. The Nestle rabbit was apparently a shill for the red cross and his disgusting beverage contained the most tainted of all substances ever that we already have inside of us.....blood!
This made its rounds through the black community in the org for sure.
The other one is the constant stories of people being "held down by demons" where they couldn't move or say anything...untilt hey are able to say Gods name! Well there is a reasonable explanation for this using (gulp) science. But that never stopped the stories.
Also, does anyone else seem to think that it always seems like whoever is president at the time, seems to be slipped whatever major publication is being distributed for bible studies? Another legend. It just changes slightly for each president.
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Gopher
Another myth had legendary country singer Glen Campbell being a JW. Supposedly someone in the WT headquarters had seen the name Glen Campbell on a Watchtower magazine subscription wrapper back in the days when people could subscribe to the magazines by mail. Very probably wasn't the same Glen Campbell.
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wha happened?
The urban legands and the absolute paranoia about the outside world is funny once u are on the outside, watching JW's squirm about everyday things like eating at a Chinese restaurant. I guess eating there with all the Buddha's around is eating with the demons.
I do remember all the stories about people studying and all things that happen to them, but they percevier. Whatever
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Gopher
Along with the Sister Paine in the rear legend / joke, there was the legend / story about the "brother" saying a concluding prayer at a meeting and asking Jehoober to forgive our "falling shorts".
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Aeiouy
I have two that I always laugh at:
First, Losch gave a part a few years back about a guy who had OCD and constantly had to wash his hands. He got so frustrated that he eventually went and bought a gun and attempted to commit suicide. However, somehow he miraculously survived the shot to the head. The Losch applied that to the decision to go to college, likening it to shooting yourself in the head. You may survive, but it's not a good idea. LOL.
Second, I always heard the story of the sister who had a bible in the back seat of her car, and somehow she was shot at with a gun. Thankfully, the bullet was stopped by the bible in her back seat, and it was soooo obvious that god stopped that bullet.
Ridiculous.
Aeiouy
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Juan Viejo2
When my three daughters were still quite young, they would come to my house every other weekend (my visitation rights). Friday or Saturday nights, when the local TV station would play old 1950s scary movies hosted by "Seymour" or "Elvira", we would all gather around the TV with popcorn and M&Ms and watch movies like "Frankenstein" and "Dracula." During the day they would sometimes turn on The Addams Family and The Munsters. For them, that was just part of what they did when they "went to visit Daddy."
One summer when they were older but still pre-teens, they got a chance to spend several weeks with their JW grandparents in Arkansas. They were really looking forward to the trip because they loved my mom and dad very much. But after just a few days in the Ozarks, they were looking to come home.
They had to endure the three nights a week spent at the local Kingdom Hall - mostly with older adults. There were also the two or three mornings when they were all dragged along as my mom and dad went in field service. Much of the "service" time was spent driving in rural areas in a four door sedan with plastic seat covers and no air conditioning in the middle of summer. Arkansas is very pretty, but uncomfortably hot and humid in the summertime. My dad would open the front air vents but kept the windows shut so that swarms of mosquitoes and bugs would not fly into the car. The inside of the car was like a pizza oven.
So my girls looked forward to times at the house so that they could get out of the heat and watch TV. My oldest daughter would look for anything fun that they liked. When she saw reruns of "I Dream of Jeannie" and "Bewitched" she would turn to those programs. Mom or Dad would hear the TV playing and come in and change the channels, telling the girls that those shows were about magic and genies were "dressed up demons." The girls found some old horror movies on the TV a couple of times and they both got turned off quickly. Mom caught the girls watching an old movie about vampires and she made them turn if off - because "vampires are demons. If you watch those kinds of movies our house can be taken over by demons. You wouldn't want that, would you?"
When they finally got back home, I noticed a change in all of them. They suddenly did not want to watch Elvira any more. When I asked them why, they told me what their JW grandmother told them during their visit. I was OK with them not watching anything that would scare them, but I assured them that they "were just movies" and "demons are not going to take over our house." But we watched old John Wayne westerns and other classic movies instead.
It only took a few weeks for them to change their minds and want to start our normal Friday night routines again. Elvira once again became a regular visitor in our house.
As grownups, they all had similar attitudes with their own children - and my grandkids love watching all of the latest horror and special effects movies without any fear of demonic possession. Of course, none of my kids or grandkids ever wanted to follow in their grandparents' paths - they learned their lesson during that short trip. I don't think any of them have ever been back to Arkansas. I'm pretty sure that none have ever been back to a Kingdom Hall either. Lessons learned...
JV