Would you kiss up to your boss to get ahead?

by butalbee 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    I wouldn't sleep with someone to get ahead, but I have often found that without much effort from me, I'm treated a LOT nicer when I look good for work. I make an effort and always try to look good: make-up, nice hair, etc. I smile and laugh. I think these things help in an industry which is mostly managed by men. However, it can backfire when it comes to being excluded from making decisions if you don't temper it with job capability and confidence. (the nice looking office girl or the craggy manager?)

    Sirona

    ** http://www.religioustolerance.org **

  • refiners fire
    refiners fire

    years ago I walked past the general managers office and saw him with his head in his hands and looking very stressed.I hardly knew the guy from soap, this was a big plant.
    So I knocked on the door and asked him what his problem was, he told me and i said "put me in charge of that department and i'll clear it up in three months"
    He did.
    Do you reckon I kissed up??

  • jesussaves
    jesussaves

    I've actually gotten ahead at my workplace for doing exactly the opposite of kissing up. Since I've been at my corporation I have more than doubled my salary by working hard and not taking any crap from anybody! I let my bosses know exactly what's on my mind, in a professional manner, and they respect me. Merit is still rewarded by some. I won't work for someone who requires kissing up.

  • JT
    JT

    Hyghlandyr

    _ I hate to dog you but for some reason i get the feeling that you are a Troll.

    I've been on the net - maybe 5/6 yrs and every so often a poster like you comes along.

    I have been cking out your post since you have been here. and they are all pretty much the same-

    Light on substance - Heavy on I got a Big Di%k and i swing it around alot for folks to see

    so it's sorta like you don't have much of substance to say so you decide "Let me throw in some Di%K line and see what happens"

    which is cool if that is what you want to do

    But being that this is a board that pretty much focuses on how the WT has affected the lives of so many your comments are kinda "out in left field"

    now don't get me wrong if hanging out in left field is your thing then that is cool as well.

    that is why i think that you are more Troll than anything else-

    BUT IF YOU ARE NOT A TROLL - I feel sorry for the quality of your life- in fact your life quality ain't much better than the JW you dog. and anyone who has followed my post know that i ain;t no friend of the jw lifestyle.

    but like i said personally you remind me IF YOU ARE NOT A TROLL of the the teenage boy who brags about all the "Coochie" he is getting when in fact he ain't seen a pc in his life

    it would be so sad to find out that you are in a wheelchair or something and can't walk. so you live out your fantasy of being a "Player".

    I recall 3 guys i have ran into on the net in forums like this in the last 5/6 yrs i have been on the net

    and only to talk to them offline and find out that all that Big Stud Muffin act they were doing was to cover their own insecurities with what has been a LACK LUSTER LIFE

    all 3 of these men were over 50yrs of age.

    so i will admit I don;t know you from Adam, but like mom always told me:

    "Sometime if you listen to what folks are not saying you will know what they are saying"

    now you can dog me, cuss me out - cool, but it will never change the fact that you have tried to introduce yourself to us here on the WWW as a Master Stud Pimp Daddy Gold tooth Big Hat wearing LoverBoy

    Yea right

    james

  • larc
    larc

    Of the comments made here, I am in most agreement with Abaddon's. I don't consider the showing of respect to your boss as kissing up. Furthermore, one needs to be attuned to the fact that different bosses have different expectations. Some like the confrontive style that a few posters mentioned, and that is great if your style matches your bosses. Some want the truth, but expect a little more diplomacy in the presentation. Adapting your approach to the particular boss is not kissing up, in my opinion.

    I would also add, that if you don't like or respect your boss, for whatever reason, it is time to move on, if at all possible.

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    If I like the person, maybe a little. If I don't like the person... NO WAY - I do have my dignity.

    "As every one knows, there are mistakes in the Bible" - The Watchtower, April 15, 1928, p. 126
    Believe in yourself, not mythology.
    <x ><

  • Hyghlandyr
    Hyghlandyr

    Some dude said:

    BUT IF YOU ARE NOT A TROLL - I feel sorry for the quality of your life- in fact your life quality ain't much better than the JW you dog. and anyone who has followed my post know that i ain;t no friend of the jw lifestyle.

    but like i said personally you remind me IF YOU ARE NOT A TROLL of the the teenage boy who brags about all the "Coochie" he is getting when in fact he ain't seen a pc in his life

    When you said 'the JW you dog' did you mean 'the JW people which you insult' or 'the jw, you person who is a dog. I am sort of unclear whether you were just calling me a dog again or whether you were accusing me of insulting and attacking the JWs. I dont particularly think you meant that I 'dog' the JWs since I havent really insulted them on here.

    In fact if you have read my posts I have stated plainly that unlike a lot of folks, I really wasn't abused as one of Jehovahs Witnesses. I am a former witness, not DFed or DAed, though they did come to attempt it. However using a bit of prethought I was able to prevent that. Not that I really care if I am shunned since I do not associate with them anyhow. But it is sort of a good mental exercise and a little bit of a victory.

    Now this coochie thing, hmm. I don't know where that comes from. I think I have said in here before I am married and married men never get any. Though sex rocks I personally am auto-sexual rather than heterosexual. Sort of bi meaning I like sex with myself and women. But I prefer it with myself. The only coochie I am getting is a couple times a month. Why? Because as I said I am married and married men dont get none.

    As far as the substance of my posts, well I think the substance of christianity, judaism, islam, buddhism, hinduism, evolutionism, atheism, etc ad naseum is sorely lacking. You people often rail against the JWs, I rail against everything. Why? Because I can and because it pleases me to do so. Most of the complaints about Jehovahs Witnesses I see in here are the same complaints I have about christianity in general. And I voice that.

    As to the rest of my posts, sometimes I am using a bit of brevity. Sometimes I am espousing my philosopy. Sometimes I am expressing my desires and fantasies, workable or not.

    I assume since your post is in this thread that you are thinking my coments about what I would or would not do to get ahead are a troll. Ok no problem. Most people would not do many of the things I would do. That is well for them. Myself, other than the moral that children should be unharmed, I am completely amoral. As to the conversations I have had with women who are interested in polygamy, well them stating they are interested in it is a large step from me claiming to get 'coochie'. And since I finished my comment stating that for now it is 'fruitless' then clearly there is no fashion a claim to coochie. However if I were not married, if I were seperated, or if my wife chose to accept other women into this union, there is no doubt that I could find women who would participate.

    Now as to the cussing, I cuss a lot, frankly I am quite fond of it. We Irish, like to argue. If you have been reading my posts you saw the three words I used to describe myself, which also happen to be my True Name, Aorthoir Rí Anbroc. Find that post for it fully describes me. And yes we absolutely will cuss at each other. My friends and I are the sort that we are able to forcefully tell each other our opinions and then sit down for a cup of hot cocoa and not be mad. Most people are unable to do so. But...To cuss at you because you think I am a troll? Hardly. For each person that thinks that there is someone that enjoys my posts.

    As to my life being boring? Personally I like my life. I spend 80% of my time on this couch and I am very very content. It has to do with the way I was brought up. Ask cygnus, he was here for a week and saw it with his own eyes.

    Now would everyone be satisfied with my life. Probably no. But then I would be unsatisfied with most people's lives. People want money so they can go here go there do this do that. They go on vacation to do things see things experience things. My experiences are fairly self contained. When I have gone on vacation, I slept. I was content. The crew I went with tried to get me to go to this place and that. No, thank you though. Think of me as a hobbit. Unadventerous. Perhaps you are a Ranger. Give me a quite place and a computer some hot dogs and cheap cardboard store bought microwaved pizza and that is what life is about to me.

    And lastly, being called a dog is a compliment to the Irish. Our second greatest hero Cú Chulain's name means "Dog of Chulain" and dogs were viewed as wonderful creatures, loyal, strong, in fact we even worshipped them.

  • TR
    TR

    No, I'm not an ass-kisser. That's why I work for myself.

    TR

    UADNA-WA
    Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America- Washington Division

  • Lost Diamond
    Lost Diamond

    I'm with Sirona!

    A smile and a positive personality goes a long way, and of course competence is very important. I would never kiss up to nobody, though.

  • LDH
    LDH

    Unfortunately, many XJW's still have no experience in dealing with this type of issue.

    The social skills of most JWs are about 20% of the average never-been a JW adult.

    Most adults understand that the way to get ahead (while some call it kissing up) is to strategize.

    This is not a pie in the sky world where speaking your mind and being honest at all times is rewarded, but most simpleton JWs have been indoctrinated to believe this.

    This world calls for a certain level of being politically astute at work. Not politically correct, but politically astute. Aligning yourself with the proper personnel in the office and networking with those in a position to help you will do FAR more for you than simple "Kissing Up" to the boss.

    Lisa

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