There's a story about a man sitting outside a town. A stranger approaches and asks him: "What kind of people are in this town?" The man asks him: "What kind of people were in the town you just left?" The stranger replied: "They were mean, selfish, hateful people." The man said: "That's exactly what you'll find over here, I'm afraid." Shortly after the stranger passed on, another stranger approached and asked the man the same question and again the man asked the stranger what sort of town HE had left. The stranger replied: "Oh, it was a great place. The people were very friendly and outgoing and very kind." The man replied: "I'm happy to say that's exactly what you'll find here also."
Why don't people like me
by joelbear 55 Replies latest jw friends
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Nathan Natas
Joel,
Maybe you think I'm one of the people who doesn't like you because there have been a couple of times I have been blunt with you. If you think I don't like you, you're wrong. I think you can be a very compasionate person, and reading your recent post about your life story I was moved an felt sympathy for you.
Since when has MY opinion meant anything?
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TweetieBird
Joel,
You're one of my favorite posters on this board so quit thinking like that. You are loved by many on this forum, but all that counts is if you love yourself. -
Naeblis
I don't like you because you keep punching me in the stomach.
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MrMoe
Joel -
I like you.
Kisses,
Moe -
Abaddon
I think ashitaka makes a good point, that reminds me of a story I heard once.
This guy goes with a friend to a medium. She does the cards and starts lauging hysterically the minute she laid them on the table. So, this guy hits her - boof! - -right on the nose and walks out. His friend goes after him and asks him why he did that. He answers "I always wanted to strike a happy medium".
Bad joke. You are a lovely bloke, genuinely lovely. I think sometimes your worrying and obsessing get on some people's nerves. I think sometimes your worrying and obsessing gets on your nerves too! But my best friend gets on my nerves sometimes - it doesn't mean that I don't like him.
Please try to remember that when people don't like what you're doing, it doesn't mean they don't like you, it means they probably just don't like what you're doing. Two different things joely baby.
COMF's idea is good. Have an ice cream, relax, and let yourself feel loved.
Warmest regards
Gyles
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Mulan
Joel.........I agree with TweetieBird. You are also one of my favorite posters. But, it's pointless to tell someone how wonderful they are if they don't believe you, or can't believe you. Self esteem is usually the culprit, when a person feels as you do. You need to love yourself, before anyone else can return love to you. IMO
I think you are very lovable.
Marilyn (aka Mulan)
"No one can take advantage of you, without your permission." Ann Landers -
BATHORY
G'Day Joel.
Mate, your question is a pertinent one, seemingly basic and almost rhetorical, but upon deeper inspection, is found bound and coupled with the biggest enigma of our life. Its like the Fermat's Last Theorem of psychology.
In so much as saying i myself find that i have an affinity for your person, unfortunately i am unqualified to make you believe that.
But, i can offer you a vestige point. I often consult a modern day equal to the " Mr Know It All " that once made cameo appearances on Rocky and Bullwinkle ( before the darker hours befalled upon him ),
who's name is Mr Thunderpants. Now dinkum, this blokes good, real good.I like you Joel, am often found entertaining thoughts regarding the deeper considerations of life, and just last month i threw what i thought would be like the twin envelope paradox type question onto this gem of a bloke BUT he bloody well responded to my satisfaction.
Look him up on google, he's good Joel, very bloody good. Let me show you how good he really is................
Dear Mr. Thunderpants, ( from BATHORY )
If I decide to pick your nose, which would be the proper hand to use? Your left or right?
Signed,
Just scratching
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Dear Just,
There is no proper hand to use while picking one's nose. It is a gray area with factions split almost evenly down the middle, some favoring the left hand, some the right. In Catholic schools, nuns force students to write with their right hand, even if they are left-handed. To even things out, they require all students to pick their nose with their left hand. In more liberal Catholic schools, they are now allowing masturbation under the "don't ask, don't tell" policy. This is despite the fact that most nuns are not at all interested in asking and most students are not that interested in telling. There is no word whether the Nuns prefer the left or right hand for this act.
From a nose-picking historical perspective, there is this: In the 1876 presidential race Rutherford B. Hayes was losing badly to Samuel Tilden, the governor of New York. It was almost as bad as when Walter Mondale was plastered by Ronald Reagan in 1984. But fate conspired for Tilden to grab defeat from the jaws of victory, making Hayes our 19th President.
As you undoubtedly know, in the years immediately following the Civil War, it was not permissable for bearded men to use their right hand to "search for gold," if-you-know-what-I-mean. Well, Mr. Hayes was bearded and he had recently hurt his left arm in a hunting accident (he got really drunk and shot at a group of bird watchers, mistaking them for moose, and they beat him silly). Because of his inability to use his left arm, he picked with his right and was seen doing so several times by members of his homestate Ohio press. The press did the noble thing, of course, and the news spread throughout the country like wild-fire. In those days wild fires took almost a week to travel an acre, and Hayes won the Presidency despite this faux pas, though his was an election where he not only lost the popular vote to Tilden, but also won the electoral college vote by only one vote. Whew!
Some historians believe the series of picks in which Hayes was caught red-handed might have actually been the catalyst to his garnering the presidency. At the time there was much discontent because many popular Hollywood producers had been blacklisted when they were caught in a dark room behind a back-alley bar, using the wrong hand to pick. Hollywood producers in those days produced dairy products, and much of the Southwest was without American cheese for a long time. So, when Hayes was caught, a groundswell of support lifted him to his presidency, hoping he would free the shackles of wrong-pickers everywhere and allow milk to flow freely in the Southwest once again.
Being a president, this didn't happen. Hayes was too busy golfing and working on a new invention he called "The Internet." But because a wrong-picker had won the highest office, the collar of being a wrong-picker slowly faded to the point that many historians now deny that any of this ever even happened.
So Joel if you ike my recommendation to you would be ask Mr Thunderpants and let me know ow it goes !
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Billygoat
Joel,
I think you're jumping to conclusions about people not liking you. As a matter of fact, I think there are more people on this board that like you than not. I like you because you're sweet, sensitive, honest, and have a great sense of humor. I love how you're able and willing to speak your heart even if you know that means taking criticism. Ease up on yourself honey. Enjoy the moments life brings you!
Love and goat-y hugs,
Andi -
flower
I suspect you think people dont like you for the same reasons I think people dont like me. We dont like ourselves and therefore we cant possible fathom the idea the someone else likes us. And that in turn makes us act like whiny, depressed wierdos and then people really get sick of us and start to not like us for real.
It all starts with how you feel about yourself. I am working on liking myself which may even lead to loving myself and then I think my whole perception of other peoples feelings of me will change. I dont know how to do it but I'm trying.
You sound like a nice guy. From what I've read of your posts, I like you. Your kinda funny, some of your ideas are out there tho. But I like you. I think you should start working on liking yourself.
I started by making a list called 'Ten things I hate about me'. But unfortunately it ended up being '100 things I hate about me' LOL. Now I'm changing the things I can change on that list. If they arent changable I am trying to change my attitude towards them. Like I cant get my baby toe nail to grow in thin and flat. It always gets thick and I have to keep cutting it. I wish I had a nice flat baby toe nail. But I cant change that so I'm learning to deal with it. *sigh* its hard.
flower