10yrsafter said:
I think what bothers me, is that it would appear that we run a double standard when it comes to comparing secularists and religious people. I absoulutely find ANY type of molestation abhorrent, but I think we would be quick to tar and feather the WTS and individual JW's (or any other religious denomination) as condoning pedophilia even if it just involved "minor" groping. It just seems to me that some are more willing to be apologists for the "other side" by finding justification for their positions or statements.
Thanks for starting the thread, as no doubt RD wanted to encourage discussions of the issue, as we're doing here.
I'm not sure I follow your thinking above, but I'm not ready to tar and feather anybody, and feel that SOME of the sentencing handed out for cases of molestation we've seen WERE an over-reaction. I can't recall the specific details of the case, but there was a case out of Temecula, CA a few years ago where the JW perp got sentenced to prison (something like 5 yrs) for fondling a girl's legs in a pool: prison seemed a tad excessive, IMO, as he confessed to the act. Now, as a taxpayer, I'm abhored at the idea of the public bearing the COSTS of paying for someone's room and board in prison, when parole and being added to a CA sex offender registry would likely be as effective and much-less costly for such an act.
As I said above, society goes thru cycles of what outrages and offends us, and mobs grab their pitch-forks if the outrageous "crime de jour" isn't sentenced with stiffer punishments. People demand a level of justice and protection against ALL threats and evils that exist in society, but few are willing to actually PAY for the level of protection they demand: taxes would have to be sky-high to pay for the justice to which they feel entitled. Hence citizens have an appetite for 'steak and caviar' justice, but aren't willing to even foot the bill for 'hamburger'.
Fiscal concerns aside, one can't help but notice the heads of VICTIMS group protesting RD and others in his peer group successfully overcoming their molestation to become successful, happy, well-adjusted individuals, but only by REFUSING to remain trapped in the victim role. I guess some can't see how victims refusing to see themselves as a victim might be bad business for the HEADS of victims groups, since their power is eroded without a large pool of victims whom they claim to represent?
(note that the victims are NOT CONDONING such behavior of their perps, NOT endorsing it, etc: RD was ONLY speaking to RD's PERSONAL EXPERIENCE in HIS AUTOBIOGRAPHY, and didn't suggest such acts are innoculous.)
Granted, there MAY be some unknown victim(s) of RD's molester out there who WASN'T able to overcome THEIR molestation, but that's besides the point: show me where RD even REMOTELY condoned the molester's behavior? No one can, since he never DID: he CONDEMNED it, calling it "reprehensible". Again, people are reading into his words what they WISH RD had said, rather than what he DID say; people are creating a mental straw-man so they can only knock it over. Instead, RD was speaking from his past experience and perspective of a VICTIM, so now some want to further victimize him by criticizing his EXPERIENCE and OPINION since it doesn't fit "their" agenda? Hmmm...
As far as the heads of VICTIMS groups, some might need to question THEIR conflicts of interest in this matter, since they obviously obtain power from others remaining trapped in the role of seeing themselves as victims for as long as possible, rather than moving beyond the experience by refusing to waste more valuable time of their lives that was taken from them by the molester. Do these heads of VICTIMS groups represent THEIR best interests?
That SHOULD be obvious to anyone on JWN, since any more time than necessary spent looking BACK at the harm and loss that some see as being inflicted on you by being a member of a cult is just MORE TIME of one's own life SQUANDERED that you won't get back, either: it's basically "throwing good time after bad". Don't misunderstand: time spent looking backwards IS necessary, but only as little as possible that one needs to determine what one can do to minimize your exposure from repeating the same mistake again and again (obviously that doesn't even apply to victims of CHILD molestation, since they had absolutely NO control over the situation, since the power differential was so vast. Blaming victims of child abuse is thus inexcusable, whereas ACKNOWLEDGING that they were victims of a crime they had no control over allows people to move on with their lives).
It seems like RD is taking on the abuse of power of NOT just religion AND sexual molesters, but even those who CLAIM to represent the best interests of the victims of molestation, who seemingly insist that others stay trapped in perceiving themselves in the role of 'victim'? God help the victims if they DARE to liberate themselves and move beyond the harm they experienced, to ever overcome the harm to live a successful life like RD has done.
PS the other thing to keep in mind is WHY religions try to engage in cover-ups of pedophilia and abuse: typically it's done to save face to protect the group's image, to protect their own priests/elders/MS, all done in the mistaken idea that such actions are done to protect GOD'S name, and done "to the glory of God".
It's the institutional organized cover-up that worsens the situation, since it is requires co-operation amongst the leaders to squash the testimony of molestation (eg "two witness rule" of JWs). And what underlies it all? The cover-up is done under the banner of freedom of worship (eg defendents trying to hide behind clergy/penitant privilege, in the case I mentioned above), and it's ALL driven by a misogynistic book of immoral beliefs which creates a climate where such behavior thrives since ALL members are encouraged to turn a blind eye, even threatened with censure and shunning if they DON'T. Heck, ask Barbara Anderson about THAT: she was a CO (conscientious objector) who left the JWs as she refused to keep her protests to herself, to "go along to get along"....
If there were more TRULY morality-driven types like Barbara Andersons within the JWs, the cover-up problem wouldn't have been allowed to continue (or develop, in the first place).
Adam
