Faders shunned now?

by Sammy Jenkis 46 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Sammy Jenkis
    Sammy Jenkis

    Hi all so my family had their C.A. last weekend and my mother dropped this one on me, she'll now be treating me as a df'd person per info she received from a talk at the assembly. Apparently a fader should be treated as "bad association" given the fact they up and left the holy "truth" to splash around in vomit.

    Anyone heard anything similar recently?

  • Julia Orwell
    Julia Orwell

    It seems to be the trend now for some JWs. I've had a mix of shunning and 'Hi we miss you', so it's probably down to each individual JW whether they just view you as 'weak', 'discouraged' or swimming in vomit.

  • LostGeneration
    LostGeneration

    All depends on the speaker and how they word this garbage.

    Hardcore speakers will oftentimes make reference to inactive ones in the same sentence as someone DFd, implying they should be treated the same. Then you will get a speaker who refers to never giving up hope on those that leave (whether DFd or not) which makes JWs start reaching out.

    Give it a week or two, if its really bothering you off call her up and ask for a reference in the WT for it because it concerns you. Don't comfront, be mean, or pissy about it. The goal is to get her to research for a quote that isn't there in WT literature. Hopefully she will rationalize that its not all bad to talk to her own flesh and blood.

  • zound
    zound

    Oh so that's why no one answers my emails or messages when all I do is ask them how they're going. Inactive are the new disfellowshipped.

  • LostGeneration
    LostGeneration

    I would encourage faders to press the issue if you are being shunned - assuming you aren't considered an "apostate" by these shunners- and even then go ahead if you feel like talking to them for whatever reason.

    Simply expressing shock at their actions can make them think twice before acting like this in the future. It also gives you the moral high ground, something JWs think they own.

  • Dis-Member
    Dis-Member

    I think there might be some truth to this. I have not 'heard' anything but I am experiencing it as we speak. I vanished form my local meetings some time ago without a trace or a word due to depression. In 8 months I have not received a single shepherding call.. not a single phone call even. Absolutely zero. People from that cong surround me in every direction. I used to spend almost every single day with them.

    I have not disassociated myself. I have not been d'fed either. But it seems that to them I suddenly do not exist at all. It's like I never ever existed. Over 30 years of believing in these people, believing in this organisation, and it amounts to absolutely nothing. Zilch.

    They can sever and erase you in the blink of an eye. You don't need to be disfellowshipped. The word and gossip just spreads among themselves and you become a non entity.

    It's inhuman. They have no care or compassion for anyone. If you don't play their game.. or play ball with their elders. That's it. You are dead to them. They judge, sentence you.. then kill you.

  • label licker
    label licker

    We were shunned while inactive the whole time, even by the elders. No phone call or asking us for our time reports. After they got us off their hit list they are now going after another family in another hall.

    First they will give a local needs on apostasie to let the congregation know what that all entails. More than anything they will stress to look out for ones that are not at their meetings. Next if you have family that are in it, the elders will drop a little gossip about you not at the meetings in their ears. If that family can't do anything with you than they are told to shun you.

    Next, if after all that and you still are not going to come to the meetings, then a jc is set up due to "alligations" and that's how they get you to the hall. In all our experiences and others too, the elders never ask WHY aren't you coming to the meetings. We know a couple who was sent into a hall to help it along and they were told by the society not to get involved with the problems that are going on or even to try and fix things but to just make sure the congregation is getting out in service. That's it!

    Our friends who were there for us are now under attack and this is the same procedure that is being done with them. They haven't been to a meeting for almost two years with noone caring about them and now their kids all at the same time are asking them if they are going to their meetings. They are now being threatened that they will not be able to see their grandchildren along with not working for them anymore. Once all is said and the damage done then the elders will swoop in for the kill like they did us and others. There's a pattern here guys that is tellling me that society is teaching them this route in their elder school. Hope we made the mark for their next elder school project.

    Let us know if they do the same in your hall and keep very quiet if you don't want to be df'd and lose your family and friends.

  • Barrold Bonds
    Barrold Bonds

    It's not 'policy' to shun them, but plenty of JWs will stop talking to faders. I don't hear from anyone in the hall except for my family. We don't get invited to parties or anything. There's only one family in the hall that invites us over once in a while. Even though it's obvious their goal is to 'encourage' us, I commend them for not completely ignoring me.

  • hoser
    hoser

    direct them to the FAQ at jw.org. Do jehovahs witnesses shun former members? Answer according to web page. No!

  • Scully
    Scully

    With the exception of family members, I'd be perfectly fine with JWs shunning me - except I prefer preventative shunning. It's a kind of do-unto-others-before-they-do-unto-you kind of thing.

    What usually ticks them off more than anything is when you smack them with the reality of how "loving" shunning really is.

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