Well I'm still morphing into what I'll be. But, personally for me, if god was exactly as portrayed in the OT and he did want them to kill the babies and take virgins etc, I just have a problem with it. There is lots of stuff in the OT that I can't make fit with the Jehovah version of god the JW's believe in. They make mental leaps to show god is always loving despite the things I would consider barbaric by todays standards. Then they say gods standards never change... I can't make it fit.
Being 100% honest, I do choose not serve the god that would do those things. If there was a hell then maybe I'd get to be a Lieutenant in the devils army or something.
I don't believe that if there was a god he would have a hell or do what the OT says he would do. I can't see how he could if he was perfect and didnt have human emotions since he would be a spirit and all knowing etc.
Too many pieces do not fit. I enjoy science and I think it answers many things. In the end I don't really think I ever have to know 100%. I'm a good person, I try to do good. I would imagine that would be enough for a supreme god.
Just my perspective. I try to face the truth of my actions. I accept there could be a god who guided evolution, but I think he did, then he wouldn't be the type of god that is described in the bible and would condemn people to hell...
I guess I'm satisfied with myself and my state of unbelief and uncertainty.