After all if you were to tell the brothers in the congregation that you think GOD is mean and evil they will pray with you and have someone work with you.
However, if you were to tell them that you think the Governing Body is mean and evil you will be disfellowshipped.
Revealing!
The GB is just a group of men who have no understanding and no knowledge, and that is why you aren't allowed to speak out against them... else this truth might be revealed.
Good that you recognize the conditioning in you Comatose, so you can at least know when it is THAT compelling you, and you can fight AND defeat it.
Peace,
tammy