Question for exjws who are now atheist..

EndofMysteries

This question is for athiests who had been JW's, and when leaving, had to pretty much start fresh (if most of your association had been JW's).

To help you better answer the question, here is first the reason I am asking it. My whole life and assocation were JW's only. When I left, it was at first being pretty isolated while making new friends/etc from scratch. Through someone I have been seeing, have at a few times attended their church. They don't consider themself part of the denomination though, just a christian, and at that church there is freedom for your own thoughts and ideas. It's very laid back. But also, they are much more close and loving then I had ever seen at a kingdomhall.

Several times a month they get together doing fun things, when a family had a life crisis they did a fundraiser to help them out, they do missions, they feed the poor, they have members who are trained to help those trying to get off drugs or some to help comfort those really depressed or down from a family death etc.

So in summary, it's a community of good people, trying to live life the loving way Jesus taught, and there is spiritual freedom as well, etc. I do not believe and agree with all their beliefs, but those are just technical differences, in a broad sense, I do agree with it. I am considering joining, and it won't equate to being enslaved in a set of beliefs, it will be having a new community/family who really try to live their lives happily and have a positive impact on the world.

Now I thought to myself, hypothetically, if I ended up athiest right now, what would I do?

My question is to those of you who are athiest who lost your whole community/etc, don't tell me what your options are, but tell me if you have actually found and joined some type of similar community and what is it like.

I am asking this again because EXJW's are unique in a sense, you can lose all family and life long friends just for having a difference of beliefs or opinions and for not having much association outside of the religion. Do most who end up athiests ever makeup for the loss of community/friends/family, and for those who want to also give back and help others?

I wonder if what i've seen is found outside of a laid back, just truly good hearted people united by being in a religious community that focuses only on the love aspect and non of the rules/judgement aspect.

smiddy

So, do you think only religous people (christians) perform humanitarian tasks and not non religous institutions ? I would beg to differ on that.

Granted , a lot of christian sects do provide a wealth of support and help to those in need and are down and out. (jehovahs witnesses dont fit this catergory )

Their are a multitude of organisations that are not religously affilliated who provide a wide range of activities , subjects , and freindship if you take the time to look .

smiddy

rawe

Hi EndOfMysteries,

"My question is to those of you who are athiest who lost your whole community/etc, don't tell me what your options are, but tell me if you have actually found and joined some type of similar community and what is it like."

The first group we joined after leaving, was an Ex-JW meetup group in West Phoenix. This was six months after leaving -- very helpful. And they did not mind that I was an atheist. Another Ex-JW group in the East Valley, I had to drop from because they announced that their purpose was to bring Ex-JWs to Jesus.

I joined the Phoenix Atheist Meetup Group (PAMG) and have attended a few of their events. Enjoyed it, but didn't make a real connection. Recently I have started going to the Unitarian Universalist Congregation (they accept non-believers). Have been to their services only 3 times, so we'll see -- so far so good.

Cheers,

-Randy

EndofMysteries

I do not at all think that only religious people 'want' to perform humanitarian tasks.

And again, that was only an aspect of what I saw. One can volunteer at a soup kitchen or donate to red cross, etc.

But to find a community of people who not only do those things but each month knowing there will be cookouts, events, etc, an easy way to find friends similar to how it would feel on the rare occassion a jw congregation would have a picnic, etc.

As a JW, you were a part of a community of people you saw face to face, could easily make (conditional) friends with, etc. In a religious nonjudgemental and spiritually free situation, you get that and a lot more without ever worrying about being shunned for something they don't believe or agree with.

Do any of you athiests miss/desire/want to join something like that. If you have become apart of some type of community, tell me what it is and what it's like.

Those born or who go through school as athiests it wouldn't be such a big deal since you'd have school friends and friends/family while growing up and never go through later in life loosing everything. But for those EX JW's who have lost after school years most friends/family because of the religion, have you found and joined another type of community or are your friends now just based on who you meet while working, neighbors, etc?

EndofMysteries

rawe - Thanks for responding. I was curious if any athiests would join something like that, not because of the beliefs or religious aspect but the community aspect of it, provided they allowed non believers like you said.

Just hypothetically if I became athiest, after seeing what a real group as Jesus said, they have love among themselves, is like, I think just for those things I'd stick around.

Designer Stubble

The community you descibed, seems something good - that I would not just write off. A lot of Atheists attend UU churches. Just saying.

In my case, leaving after having been a JW most of our lives, lead to loosing every last friend. There are no UU churches where we live and as an Atheist I do not want to expose the children to religion. In the five years we are out, we have slowly and gradually built a small circle of friends - from work, parents of our childrens friends, in the neighborhood, etc... But remains indeed an area in shich we somewhat struggle. We do some volunteer work and also find some satisfaction in that, with like-minded persons.

No silver bullet here - but true unconditional friendships take time.

Black Sheep

There's lots of choice around here. Lions, Rotary, Fire Brigade, charity veggie garden, Men's Shed, car clubs, numerous sportng clubs, spinners & weavers, herb groups, art co-ops, music, theater, dance, plus the pubs and clubs have subgroups in them. No need to turn to the churches if you want to keep yourself busy.

rawe

Hi EndofMysteries,

"I was curious if any athiests would join something like that, not because of the beliefs or religious aspect but the community aspect of it, provided they allowed non believers like you said."

My wife directly asked Rev. Andy after the service how many members would identify themselves as atheists. He responded about 1/2. The congregation has about 200 or so members. As far as I can tell both Unitarians and Universalists have Christian roots that started with the rejection of damnation (i.e. universal salvation). In 1961 the two groups merged to form the UU Church. Since they are liberal and inclusive those who didn't fit into other religious settings found their way into UU. The growh of atheists and humanists in the group I think is fairly recent. I still have a fair amount of ignorance about this -- so please don't take what I say as for certain.

"Just hypothetically if I became athiest, after seeing what a real group as Jesus said, they have love among themselves, is like, I think just for those things I'd stick around."

In the book The Portable Atheist - Essential Readings for the Non-Believer, page 307 has an bit by Richard Dawkins entitled Atheists for Jesus. In this Dawkins makes the point modern atheists have parallels with Jesus, in particular his rejection of "many aspects of Yahweh's vengeful nastiness." The problem of course in testing the waters of atheism, is we may have little personal choice in the matter, but rather feel strongly compelled by the evidence before us. The harder we try to find some reason to retain belief in God, very well may lead us to deeper rejection of the notion entirely. That was true in my case -- it is, I must now admit, just who I am.

Yet, I too feel a longing for belonging to coin a phrase. Will the UU church work for this? I don't know, but I hope so.

Cheers,

-Randy

notjustyet

Just joined 2 groups in the last 2 weeks using meetup.com and searched for "freethinker" or possibly atheist etc,..

Check it out,...

NJY

OnTheWayOut

My question is to those of you who are athiest who lost your whole community/etc, don't tell me what your options are, but tell me if you have actually found and joined some type of similar community and what is it like.

Straight up- NO. I did not join any humanitarian group. I have joined ex-JW's for personal support, and I occasionally attend A.A. but I have not joined an actual group that is involved in humanitarian aid.

That said, I am not interested in joining some kind of group other than those that support/aid each other. I certainly wouldn't want to join a "spiritual" group that says anything about doing what Jesus wanted. I see nothing wrong with your wanting that, but it ain't for me.

You don't have to join a group, especially one that is a church group, in order to do good. You can volunteer on occasion and donate time/money/energy in many private or personal ways.

Personally, I had enough of hearing anything at all about what fictional Jesus intended and if people do a humanitarian effort, I would hate that they give credit to fictional Jesus.

Question for exjws who are now atheist..

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