I know TTATT... so why do JW apologists still scare me?

by ILoveTTATT 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • Bruja-del-Sol
    Bruja-del-Sol

    When I was out for nearly two years, a sweet old lady I worked for had a surprise for me one day... she had two JW's at the door and accepted a Watchtower and Awake... She thought it would be fun for me to see this, but the second I saw it I got pain in my stomach. I couldn't even get my self to opening them and read... it just made me sick. I told the lady that I understood why she took them and that I appreciated her thoughts of me, since she was only trying to help me and have some fun, but that I wouldn't read them. Later we did have a laugh about it, but the initial feeling it gave me was horrific. Like something awful tried to jump inside my head...

    A couple of weeks ago when JW's left their tract in our gate it was the first time ever since that I read something from the WTS. It wasn't really upsetting, but it did give me a couple of funny feelings... knowing that I used to spread things like that (well, actually the tracts in my days were 'a little more' intelligent...)... Like Simon said, it's conditioning that is still there, faint... but still there.

  • jwfacts
    jwfacts

    Indoctrination works on repetition, which builds strong associations within your thought patterns. It takes years to rewire.

    One of the first things I studied was earthquakes, and learnt that earthquakes are not more frequent now than ever before. Yet for the first few years after leaving, every time there was an earthquake, I felt terrible fear that Armageddon may be real.

  • ILoveTTATT
    ILoveTTATT

    Thank you jwfacts, and everyone, for your comments!!

    I will seriously start re-reading everything and making a note of things. I think that I will start reverse-witnessing to get more experience with TTATT.

  • adamah
    adamah

    Bruja del Sol said- knowing that I used to spread things like that (well, actually the tracts in my days were 'a little more' intelligent...)

    I don't think so: it sure seems like the same ol' flawed emotional appeals and logic on display in the old pubs, just that it may have seemed they were much smarter back when you weren't looking with the critical viewpoint you now have.

  • Bruja-del-Sol
    Bruja-del-Sol

    You're probably right adamah... Maybe I'm just being caught on another tiny piece of old 'cult thinking'... some sort of stupid pride residue about "our" pubs... Need some more rewiring!

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