Have you put on the "New Personality" ?

by Phizzy 35 Replies latest jw experiences

• 

  Phizzy

  When we were in we were often read that scripture and told we should work hard at putting on the New Personality, which in WT speak meant their Cult personality, nothing like the person of Christ.

  Since leaving it has become necessary for us to make deep internal changes, to our Worldview, to our emotions, and to our actions.

  We have had to change from being controlled in all these areas by the WT Cult, to forming our own New Personality.

  For born-ins like me this is really quite a task, we do not have a "Pre-cult" personality to "recover". But even for converts, there is stilll this work to do, before you joined you may have been Racist, Homophobic, or perhaps a thief, or immoral in some other way, surely you do not wish to "recover" those aspects of your original personality ?so you too have to "put on" a new one.

  How are we all doing with this ? I know that for me I feel it is still a work in progress, I need to work on certain things that are the result of my being in the JW/WT scam for all those decades, and some things that are a part of my natural personality which are not desireable as traits, laziness for example, and I am the Arch-Procrastinator, not good.

  How do you guys feel you are doing since leaving ?
• 

  OUTLAW

  When we were in we were often read that scripture and told we should work hard at putting on the New Personality,

  which in WT speak meant their Cult personality, nothing like the person of Christ.

  ....................

  ............................................................................................ ...OUTLAW
• 

  Faithful Witness

  I was never a JW, but I can tell you I have many personalities. Every time I've tries to define myself, I have ended up with even more questions.

  Different situations call for the use of different skills and different perspectives. We are all human, and all different.

  Having spent your whole life being forced to fit a cookie-cutter prototype persona, is tragic. You were very brave to post this question. Thanks for bringing it up.

  I would suggest that we are all on our own path, and that we are all growing and developing our "selves" as we go. JW's have an extra challenge, when they leave the security and insulation of the organization. I can tell you that I have always struggled to figure out exactly "where" I fit into the world, and that the answer to that question actually keeps changing! Human life is complicated, and I don't know anyone who has had a perfect definition of "who" or "why" they are.

  Thanks for asking this question. I am curious to see what response people have.

  Welcome to the world of possibilities! Live, love, enjoy and (most importantly) forgive yourself and others.
• 

  Phizzy

  Spot on as usual Outlaw ! I remember my Religious Education teacher at school saying to me "Don't be a Sheep, we are not to be like that". If only I had listened to him !
• 

  Hummingbird001

  As a JW, my opportunities for showing true love and kindness to others were restricted. Restricted in the sense of: No community volunteering, no giving financially to charities, no real kindnesses shown to anyone not a JW, etc....

  Now, many opportunities have opened up! I'm not rushing to go in field service every morning and coming home exhausted, so I regularly shovel my elderly neighbor's walk. I'm not racing to meetings in the evenings, so I have time to make brownies and take them over to meet the new neighbor. I've learned that door to door is NOT performing a community service. Joining in with your neighbors for annual spring clean-ups, volunteering at seniors centers, donating to women's shelters, and helping to sort winter clothing for the homeless are much more practical ways to serve your community.

  PLUS, there's personal satisfaction you don't get from ringing doorbells on empty houses.

  Is this "putting on the new personality"? Or is it just be more able to fully use the one I have?
• 

  Oubliette

  It is most definitely a Work-In-Progress, or should I say, I am!
• 

  nonjwspouse

  I have questioned my born in to a JW family this question of the "new personality" he announced last year he would now be working to put on and discard the "old personality".

  I asked what about his old personality wes so sinful that he had to be rid of it? What was so bad about him before that he must cast away? He was usually quite stumped with that question because his real personaliry is very giving, caring, thoughtful and he had been a good husband and Dad. Eventually if I would ask him more than once about this "new personaity" he would tell me I just won't understand his need to put on a bible based personality ( huh?) proceed to tell me a new personality woldmake hm a better person, father and husband, then declared angrily the conversation over.

  Of course he knows I NEVER allow a conversation to be "over" just delayed. So in other discussions I woud remind him he was a better person, father and husband before he announced this shedding of his "old personality" and trying to put on the "new bible based personality". He was not able to argue this because it was obviously true. He would create a conversation stopper each time.

  So are there specific instructions with this "new personality"? What exactly is the terminology for this "new personality" aside from being "bible based" which to me means a cop out answer.
• 

  Bungi Bill

  "Don't be a Sheep"

  My non-JW mother kept trying to tell me that. Unfortunatety, though, that only got my back up and made me more determined to stick to my guns!

  After finally bracing myself and making The Move 19 years ago, I spent a considerable number of years getting back in touch with the person I was before the Watchtower Madness had taken hold. That process was finally completed six or seven years ago.

  One of the realisations I had during this process was that beforehand, I had known many very non-JW people:

  - ones who were better individuals than a lot of the JWs I had to deal with.

  Furthermore, these same persons were happy to welcome me back, even though they must have once thought that I had taken complete leave of my senses!

  i.e. their forgiveness was genuine, not switched on / switched off by a bunch of old fogies in New York, who would have you believe that they are the sole channel between God and the human race!

  Bill.
• 

  Bungi Bill

  Correction:

  I meant to say "very good non-JW people"!

  Bill
• 

  thedog1

  If you are looking for a bible-based answer to this then I suppose what the bible writer was getting at was this, as Paul said here,

  (Ephesians 5:3-5) 3 Let fornication and uncleanness of every sort or greediness not even be mentioned among YOU, just as it befits holy people; 4 neither shameful conduct nor foolish talking nor obscene jesting, things which are not becoming, but rather the giving of thanks. 5 For YOU know this, recognizing it for yourselves, that no fornicator or unclean person or greedy person—which means being an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of the Christ and of God.

  (Colossians 3:5-11) 5 Deaden, therefore, YOUR body members that are upon the earth as respects fornication, uncleanness, sexual appetite, hurtful desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. 6 On account of those things the wrath of God is coming. 7 In those very things YOU, too, once walked when YOU used to live in them. 8 But now really put them all away from YOU, wrath, anger, badness, abusive speech, and obscene talk out of YOUR mouth. 9 Do not be lying to one another. Strip off the old personality with its practices, 10 and clothe yourselves with the new [personality], which through accurate knowledge is being made new according to the image of the One who created it, 11 where there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, foreigner, Scyth′i·an, slave, freeman, but Christ is all things and in all.