by Julia Orwell 43 Replies latest watchtower medical
Makes sense. I knew quite a few JWs who suffered with CF it's really hard to keep up in a religion that refuses to ever tell you your doing enough.
I agree with Flyinghighnow a good Therapist would be a great next step. I'm on the same path right now. I wish you the best.
Julia, this just highlights the body/mind connection.
Yes, 20 years of being a JW can wear you down. The good news is NOW you know why you felt/feel the way you do and NOW you can do something about it.
Yes it will take time, but every day in every way you're getting better and better!
Oubliette
I am so sorry, this was hard to hear I am sure. I have have fibromyalgia, which is similar to chronic fatigue. For me, it was also caused by a combination of this religion, a stressful job, a bad marriage, and a child with a serious mental health problem. There is only so much a person can take before the body breaks down. This was twenty years ago and though my life is better, the problem lingers on. I learned to live with it and was doing well until three years ago when I developed another issue. It has been very difficult, I am in constant pain and have to take pain meds now.
What works for me is meditation, every day. I must get adequate sleep, so I have a routine that I stick to, no going out late, no TV after a certain time, no bright lights or loud music before sleep. No caffeine, no junk food, and I take a good amount of vitamins. I try to get some exercise every day. I ended up going gluten free, that has helped me a lot. I try to maintain a positive mental attitude. No matter how hard it is, I have to be grateful for the things I do have, that is very important. I have to be honest enough to see when my own thinking is contributing to my problems.
I have not given up looking for a cure, I research and read everything I can find. Doctors can help you a lot, but at the end of the day you know yourself best. Don't hesitate to to challenge your doctor if you think they have it wrong.
JWs have a "waiting for the other shoe to drop" mentality, and work for a "what have you done for us lately" corporation. How could mental illness not occur? The constant stress, even the non-stop internal dialogue of deciphering TTATT can drive you to the brink of insanity. Your body can only exist in an amped-up, fight or flight state for so long. After a while the body and mind must rest. If you don't let them, they will MAKE you rest.
The GB and Elders want you to be "work horses", what you should really be is stubborn mule. Do you know the difference? A gold star to anyone who knows!! Hang in there Julia! I know the feeling, believe me! It's the JW enviroment that is killing your soul. You could try doing some real charity? It may brighten your spirits!
DD
Mark 10:17-21: (WT version satire):
17 And as he was going out on his way, a certain man ran up and fell upon his knees before him and put the question to him: “Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit everlasting life?” 18 Jesus said to him: “Why do you call me good? Nobody is good, except one, God. 19 You know the commandments, ‘Do not murder, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not defraud, Honor your father and mother.’” 20 The man said to him: “Teacher, all these things I have kept from my youth on.” 21 Jesus looked upon him and felt love for him and said to him: “One thing is missing about you: Go, preach to everyone you meet every Saturday, go to meetings at least twice a week, study the scriptures with your family, go to special assemblies, circuit assemblies and district conventions, and make sure you obey every commandment from the governing body.”
Physical ailments, and emotional stresses affect us all. It's just being a JW makes it all worse. "Waiting" our whole life is exhausting and sickening.
There's plenty of truth to the Proverb: "Hope deferred makes the heart sick" Prov 13:12 (NIV)
Julia, sorry you're going through all that. I'm very familiar with CFS and Fibromyalgia. The sad truth is that it can change one's mood significantly, and drive even close friends away. 75% of marriages fail because of illnesses like these (source: Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Fibromyalgia and Other Invisible Illnesses The Comprehensive Guide). Here's hoping you'll start getting better, even if slowly but surely.
The same thing happened to me not long after I started attending meetings after studying for three - four months. I'd read the magazines on/off for yrs. and nothing made sense about the goodness, love, true God, etc., once I was inside the cult. My study conductor was a dictator and was telling me what kind of house I had to live in - what activities my child/niece/nephew could participate in, etc It was bad. I'd sit at all those meetings exhausted and wonder how they could spout off that scripture how the pharisees weighed down the poor people with heavy loads and knew this was the Watchtower. Everytime they said something evil about the world I cringed after knowing only a couple of their conniving members. I didn't recognize them as having love except a few among a cliche. Nothing made sense but I was brainwahsed thinking it was the truth and the paradise pictures in the magazines -- talk about crazy! I should have listened to my husband and checked out their information and quotes not to mention a hundred other things he tried to tell me. When he heard they were against education (college) he couldn't believe that didn't raise a huge red flag in my head - duh!
I was so sick --- low grade fever, sore throat, swollen glands, extremely tired and finally was diagnosed with CFS. I didn't take it too seriously thinking they were telling everyone w/hiccups they had CFS when they couldn't figure out a real diagnosis. Thought it would go away in a week or two if I paced myself - not true. It's awful. Amazing there aren't more sick people in that cult.
Keep care of yourself.
I have cronic pain and chronic fatigue. I started on methadone a few months back and it has relieved not just my pain but eased my fatigue and given me much enrrgy. My problem has been that so often I work wigh doctors on my pain that my fatigue gets ovrrlooked. Also physical body pain may be a trigger or cause of fatihue. It certainly is not far fetched to think such a thing in any case. I would like to know who your doctor is. I admire that he would go there if you know what I mean. Could you pm me when you get a chance. Maybe we could form a sort of jwn support groip just for chtonic fatigue and chronic pain.
Not in a cold-hearted way I wanted to say "Join the club." Many of us are overcoming our "experience."
On the light side, he didn't say you have some untreatable terminal thing. I hope that helps.
