What do you do?

Jen1

You want to be left alone? You are fading. But the elders want to visit you.

I have put them off a few times, and the holidays have delayed things, and now they are starting to ask again.

I used to say yes everytime, but have had enough. My husband hardly goes to meetings. And I only go to meetings sometimes because of family. I do not want to be dis/disfell.

I have depression.

I have no one outside to talk to. And cannot express my feeling to family or jws nothing would be confidential.

To be honest some do not talk to me anyway at the hall, mainly sisters who judge.

The pressure from elders/wives is to much and making me ill.

Jen1

ok sorry I am just repeating myself, feeling sorry for myself.

I know what to do!

LoisLane looking for Superman

Sorry Jen1 that you are depressed and not enjoying your life right now.

Do you know how to stand up for yourself and tell the Elder(s) to please leave you alone. You need time to get well. Tell them that.

Tell them you are sorry they do not understand your situation but that Jehovah and Jesus do understand.

Tell them not to get in touch with you. Tell them you need your rest, and peace and quiet and to please respect that.

Jen1, that should do it.

You are being bullied, by bullies. The same with their wives. They are not being kind and loving to you.

Do not say, never say, you are having a problem with Bro or Sis So in so.

Briefly say you are unwell and please leave you alone. Say you pray to Jehovah and he understands. Now please leave.

With aggressive people, you have to be more aggressive and stand up for your rights or for their fun, they will plow you down.

LoisLane ... Just thinking about going to the KHall makes me ill.

(((Hugs to You)))

It seems like this cult is making you ill. You seem like you need a plan to get rid of the elders, or be able to confront them. You can tell them you are depressed and sorting it out with Jehovah and will make meetings and service when you can. If you are still reporting hrs, lie on your report, put 5 hrs in for Dec, no one will ask.

Please tell me more about your situation so I can be more tailored to your circumstances.

Take care love Kate xx

KateWild

This thread is some advice I got when I had to face the elders

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/members/private/266620/1/My-JC-meeting-Did-they-RI-me#.Ur09_vRdW8A

and this is a yt interview of how I planned my exit and how I am recovering so far. Love Kate xx

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_uWFKDFMdQ&feature=c4-overview&list=UUCLreH8z5nWXuytHdH15FkQ

Captain Blithering

Hang in there jen, stay strong, follow the advice above, and keep putting them off. They'll give up eventually, others in the cong will warrant their attention more and you'll be free! Hugs.

Xanthippe

Jen1 I had clinical depression while a JW. You can't cope with speaking to theses elders. Tell them you have depression and can't speak to them. Get your doctor to write you a letter if necessary to say you have depression. They will do it for a small charge. Take care of yourself and don't let these people push you around.

The Searcher

Hi Jen, I am so sorry to hear of your stress.

Reading experiences such as yours makes me even more determined to be resolute when I reach the final stages of my fade.

When I say "resolute" I don't mean in a confrontational way - that would just motivate them to come after me. No, I'm going to play the "serious problems which I can only pray about" card!

Giving them no information whatsoever debilitates them!! Their existence & power is based on personal knowledge of their victims.

They can't discipline you because you won't discuss PRIVATE & PERSONAL details about your "problems".

Give them ANY information whatsoever, and they've got their wedge into your life - I'd bet my house on it!!!!

Telling them it's deeply personal will cheese them off, because they know that if they push you, all you will have to say to them is, "Will you sit and discuss with me all of YOUR private and personal concerns first, then I'll tell you mine?". That'll bring the point home!!

Don't answer anything, just keep side-stepping any persistence on their part by repeating your prepared answer.

Love & best wishes for you.

jgnat

You deserve your peace. I suggest you practice your delivery in front of the mirror. You may give a soft answer but in a powerful way with shoulders back and direct eye contact.

If they insist after you decline you can try the broken record technique.

As others have suggested you may mention that you are CONFIDENT that you are safe in Jehovah'a hands.

Jen1

Hi thank you all for your kind words and good advice.

Yes, it is making me ill. I am not a bad person, all I have done is not attend meetings or go out in service, because I just do not want to. And that is because I do not get the truth anymore! The them and us Watchtowers. New light. New bibles. Nasty elders wives. Pedophiles in the congregation!!! Elders who want to know/demand to know personal stuff.

They think my depression is because I am not a loyal jw. Sorry my depression is because of the nasty unkind bullies, who I have let get to me!

I will no longer be bullied.

Looking forward to 2014. x

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