Pfffff... some subject you trigger. My JW-wedding wasn't very special, although at the time I thouht it was awesome (being 18 and getting all that attention, which I never had).
The wedding was cheap, I bought a dress from another sister (that day someone came up to me and asked "isn't that *sister's name* dress?" ), my mother didn't like the dress and never said anything nice about it, not even on the wedding day. She also didn't like the groom very much. In fact my parents told me weeks before the wedding that they were not going to give permission (not being 21 yet both my parents had to sign that they allowed me to marry), so I told them I would write a letter to the queen to get HER permission. In the end they were probably afraid what other people might say about them, so they gave in and signed.
We had a talk in the KH. Nothing very special. We asked an elder-friend of ours, but he wasn't a very good speaker... Usually there would be some illustration in the form of a gift. I've had seen lots of special gifts for couples and hoped we would get something special too... but we got a bouquet of thistles with one rose in the middle... I was supposed to be that one rose. But okay, I didn't show my disappointment of course.
Before the talk we spent a while in my parent's house with my family, then we drove 25 kilometers to my husband's parents to meet with his family, then we drove 13 kilometers to see my uncle and aunt (he was my witness beside my parents... in Holland both need at least one witness to sign, like a 'best man'), since my aunt gave birth to my niece the day before so she couldn't be at the wedding. Then we drove back to my inlaws again and from there we drove to the KH for the talk, also about 15 kilometers away. (Nice relaxed wedding day huh? NOT! )
After the talk we drove in 'procession' to a restaurant fairly close to the hall. There we had just a reception, no party, no dancing. We didn't have money for a party. But because my groom was son of an elder who gave talks everywhere he knew LOADS of JW's, and I came from a city where they switched and changed congregations regularly, so I knew a lot of JW's too... so we sent invitations to about 7 congregations! So we've been standing nearly all evening, just shaking hands from all the people that were literally standing in a row for half an hour (the row went on til outside!!) that wanted to congratulate us. My jaws and cheeks hurt from the smile I had to keep on my face (which wasn't sincere anymore after an hour or so, it felt like a mask) and I was asking myself why in heaven's name we invited all those people that I didn't even know!!! Over 350 people, including family, came to our wedding.
Of course most of them brought a present, so the day after the wedding we were busy unwrapping everything (and counting money haha, which was almost enough to pay for the reception) and we had our empty house full with stuff...
I would have wanted a weddingcake, as a little girl I always dreamed of a beautifully decorated wedding cake... So my parents said they were willing to pay for it, but only if we paid for a dinner for all our family members. That would've been a dinner for over 25 people! We couldn't afford that! So we refused to have a dinner, therefore my parents refused to buy a wedding cake. So there was no wedding cake, just ordinary pie from the restaurant.
On the wedding pictures were of course mostly JW's, but since we've been divorced since 12 years now I never look at them anymore. In fact, I don't have them. I think my daughter confiscated the album (which I made myself, the pictures were taken by a brother and that was his gift to us). The last time I saw those pictures (after I was DF'd) it felt awkward seeing all those people. Lots of them I didn't even know who they were, most of our 'friends' were already out of our lives, JW friendships aren't usually very strong and we had moved to another town. But some of them were long time friends and they have dumped me immediately when they heard I was no longer a JW.
My second wedding with absolutely no JW's around was amazing, it was a fairytale wedding, I felt like Cinderella, and I finally had my wedding cake with marzipan roses and silver coloured pearls And I had the husband that I originally had wanted for the first wedding!
