Please write: show but not tell.

compound complex

Greetings, fellow posters!

Movies can easily show emotion on an actor's face, or depict what he's thinking by his actions.

Not so easily in writng. Abstracts like love and fear and courage and loyalty are a challenge to show. Sure, you can say the boy is brave, you can say Mom is loving and devoted. How do you show human characteristics in words as you write about the people in your story?

Would you kindly write a few lines -- or more -- depicting a human trait (good or bad) without actually saying the person is loving, courageous, hateful, loyal, etc.

THANKS!

CoCo

Bruja-del-Sol

The young woman took the older woman's hand in hers and gently started to stroke it, all the while singing to her, with a soft voice not to disturb the old woman in her afternoon nap. Feelings overflowed the young woman... she couldn't bare the thought that this old lady would soon no longer be a part of her everyday life, no more small talk, no more stories about times long gone, no more laughter like they were two high school broads... No she couldn't bare even imagining the loss she was about to suffer... She was glad she had been able to enlighten the last years of the old lady with laughter and just her presence. The memories made in these past few years would soon be all there's left...

The old woman opened her eyes and she smiled when she felt the young woman was still holding her hand... eyes met, smiles on both faces... and four eyes started to fill with water...

compound complex

Beautiful, Bruja!

Thank you so much for a wonderful start . . .

Loyalty, admiration, affection. Something to ponder as I head out the door in a few minutes to meet today's challenges.

With gratitude,

CoCo

Bruja-del-Sol

You're welcome CoCo, was my pleasure. It was a memory... except for the tears in the end, they were real time in only my two eyes when I wrote it.

rip van winkle

Wow, responses so fast! Ugh!

I have been writing a bit and will just post the first part.

____

First, just one tear--and then-- another, slowly made its way from the corners of her deep- set, blue-gray eyes, when she first caught a glimpse of her son-- now a young man--coming towards her outstretched arms. Her heart leapt and began to rapidly fill her ears with the sound of its beat . Her boy was saying something, but she couldn't hear him, as his quickening pace made his way, up the steps of his home's ivory porch and into the tightening arms of a mother's loving embrace.

.

She thought to herself, I will never again let him go...

.

____

(Sorry, CoCo, this was a challenge for me, but I tried! May try again later!)

Bruja-del-Sol

Thanks Rip, another one of this kind of stories and I'll keep sobbing all evening...

rip van winkle

Brujy, yours is so good!

I wrote another 2 paragraphs, because I'm OUTTA CONTROL!!

Bruja-del-Sol

Yours was good too Rip! Really, I feel her emotion... the feeling of having lost and finally found again. Good job, really! Keep them coming!

rip van winkle

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((Brujy))

Bruja-del-Sol

Aaaah thanks... I'll try to write another one... different feel... let me see...

He knew he hit bulls eye with her! Yesss, he did it! He got even! Watching her, sitting there, back against the wall, curled up with her arms around her knees, head down, crying her eyes out... he just knew he gave her what she deserved, she had it coming BIG time! He didn't even have to hit her like the last time. Words were his weapons this time and that was enough. Now she knows how he feels after all she's done to him. He will never let her come as close to him as she was before, she blew it... What made her think that she could talk and flirt around with that other guy anyway?

Please write: show but not tell.

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