by DuvanMuvan 33 Replies latest jw friends
Interesting comment. My worldly friends never discussed religion with me, nor tried to get me to leave. I did not associate with them much, but when I did, they never tried to force me to get drunk, have sex or smoke. On the other hand, I did most of those sorts of things with my JW friends.
When I had a recent school reunion, my school friends were all very interested that I had finally left that crazy religion.
Outlaw - "Where Did All The Fornicaters Go?!.."
Authoritarians always accuse others of what they themselves are doing or want to do.
The reality isn't black and white like they put it. Not everyone outside is all bad just cause they don't conform to the standards of a JW. I'm a born in and still young, but I never really had any friends in the congregation even while still believing in religion. I did notice while growing up, that there were some younger JWs who would do things they shouldnt have like date, swear, smoke, and hang out with the wrong people. At the Kingdom Hall, they were seen as good young people in the congregation. I never did those things but it got me to question what we were being told. Plus I always had "worldy" friends at school, and even though there were times when it was difficult to relate to them, they still respected my religion and didn't push me to do bad things. They didn't really care if I was a JW and were helpful, good people. What is interesting is that I felt like I could be more like myself, and more relaxed with them and with people at school than at the congregation.
My point being: it's more about finding the right people who are good to be around with. What the Watchtower does is use fear tactics; they demonize and highlight the bad on the other side to scare people, and when the people swallow those ideas, they avoid the others. It creates a separation, a barrier and a way of control.
@Faithful Witness no I'm not baptised and that thing about the support was the whole reason I joined this forum
@jwfacts I'd like to thank you personally. I was having doubts because despite the many holes in the story of noah's ark, everyone seemed to be positive that it happened. I took a huge risk by going onto your website but it really paid off. It was a really good stepping stone that allowed me to start questioning the other things I was taught. This one time my mum invited a brother (one of the more knowledgable ones) over to try to convince me that it had happened. Unfortunately he was using the same material that both you have covered and that I had looked at personally before coming to the conclusion that it didn't happen.
looks like I'm out of posts for the next 8 hours or so. Guess I got a bit carried away there... I'll make a separate thread about my current beliefs and stuff later because that seems easier
Welcome DuvanMuvan, Are you still living at home? What are your plans to become financially self-sufficient to reduce being pressured to get dunked? As long as you don't get dunked, your family may not shun you in the future - NO gaurantees though.
Although JWfacts is an awesome website about the WTBTS, you may want to visit www.freedomofmind.com to help you learn how to communicate better with JWs so that you can avoid being shunned. Reading Steve Hassan's books (i.e., "Combatting Cult Mind Control", "Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves", and (his latest book) "Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults and Beliefs"), visiting his website, and/or watching his videos, should help you communicate better with JWs' authentic personas to minimize the possibility of being shunned by JW relatives and friends.
Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,
Robert.
I have been more hurt and disappointed by my jw friends than my "worldly" associates.I always kept my friends even after being baptised.I never thought Jesus would have turned his back on people who had been kind to him, regardless of their religous affiliations.
Don't keep all your eggs in one basket.
Welcome, DuvanMuvan!
Two things I've learned since leaving is how wrong my perceptions of "worldly" people had been, and how conditional the friendships I had in "the truth" were.
@Abiblestudent hopefully this answers your questions. I didnt want to post it here because it was a bit off topic.
also I was trying to find a quote where it said that Christian youths attract more friends or something. I don't remember the article but I definetely remember two pictures of an jw teenager at school getting these looks from some girls at school then in the next picture he receives a text of a picture of that girl. (Dw the picture was fully clothed and really cheesy) it might have been an article about dating though.
You know I've been going to school with "worldly" people for quite a while now and I have never been offered a cigarette but the ypa books and stuff make it seem as if that's all people do.
Is it me or are they trying to scare the parents more than anything else?
That's a very good suggestion. And while we're at it, it's mainly the JW mothers who will see these pictures and fret over their poor innocent kids having to associate with those ungodly worldly kids who will corrupt them. It's natural for parents to be protective of their children's innocence (and the world has its share of helicopter moms), but the Society exacerbates that protective feeling until the emotionally manipulated and stunted parent becomes a stifling burden to their child's development. The worst manifestation of this is home schooling.
(Just to be clear, I'm not knocking home schooling; I'm knocking JW home schooling as the ultimate attempt at a parent preventing their kid from ever having a chance of learning about the outside world except through their own JW filter.)
